Which lecture will I get from my grandparents tonight?

[eyesroll]

OK, two weeks ago, my parents visited my new place. Tonight, it's my grandparents' turn (oh, and my parents are coming, too...yippee). This is the first time I will have seen them since telling them about my divorce (which, in my family, is a rarity).

They are very stereotypical Jewish grandparents.

There will be a lecture at some point. Question is -- which one?

[Southpaw Bookworm]

1. A combination of all of the above?

Best of luck to you, and remember that you don't have to take their crap.

[Wickerman]

2. all of the above lecture?

My grandmother wasn't even Jewish and she could've hit 3/4 of those before she crossed the threshold to whatever shithole I was living in a tthe time. And, I miss her.

[eyesroll]

4. Mine tend to take a theme and run with it.

But any one of those lectures could pop up in some form.

And, yes, I love them dearly, of course.

[StopTheMorans]

3. definitely the"you know you can't start dating until the divorce is final"

don't want to bring undue shame upon the family don't you know:)

[Donkeyboy75]

5. The baby lecture.

I don't know your grandparents, so I'll have to go with that one. You and I are about the same age, IIRC, and I'm getting a bit from the in-laws.

[eyesroll]

6. Baby lectures are fun when you're newly single!

They've wanted great-grandchildren forever. Now that my cousin's producing them one (because, see, it's all about them), the pressure's off me (they surely don't want illegitimacy in the family).

I think I shall offer to pick up a guy at a bar and make him my Baby Daddy if it'll make them happy. That should end the lecture.

[Donkeyboy75]

7. Ya think?

I just think they'll dip into their "in case of emergency" lectures.

[feminatty]

8. Lots of sex

Tell them you are having lots of unprotected sex with anonymous partners. I doubt they will ask you anything else after that.

[underpants]

9. I picked the liquor license one

What about the "if you wore some more make-up..." one?

[eyesroll]

10. OOOH! I forgot that one completely...

Although that tends to come from my mom. She'll just stare and then after the "what are you looking at?"/"oh, nothing" back-and-forth she'll finally tell me my eyebrows need tweezing.

:eyes:

[underpants]

12. This comes from the Lisa Loeb video of ten years ago

I think I was flipping around the TV at my folk's place about 10 years ago at this time of the year and I ran across the Loeb "Stay" video so (I knew what she would say) I ask my Mom what she thinks of her....she takes a second, sizes her up and says "Well she'd be very pretty if she did something with herself"

:bounce:

I KNEW that was what she would say!

[Love Bug]

11. I picked the all-purpose "we only want what's best for you" lecture

Which will probably be followed by the "You look chilly--here take my sweater--that's ok, I've lived my life" lecture/guilt dump!

[mark414]

13. aw you're from milwaukee??

king and north...ha! i used to work not too far from that intersection...

[Catchawave]

14. May I add my "baggage"....a catholic's version

- your natural hair color is so much prettier
- your too thin, eat something
- you really should go to church
- well, in my day, we didn't have that option/money/choice
- I know a nice young man/woman, who still lives with his/her parents
- (see above) and he/she's 43, such a good child

[kick-ass-bob]

15. Landline.

Lord knows you get murdered every day.