WASHINGTON, Dec. 8, 2016

[artboy]

President-elect George P. Bush announced today that he would reappoint Donald Rumsfeld to another term as
secretary of defense. Rumsfeld has served in that position since he was appointed by President George W. Bush in 2001. After serving two terms in George W. Bush's administration, Rumsfeld served an additional two terms in the subsequent administration of President Jeb Bush. His 16 consecutive years heading the Pentagon is the longest uninterrupted tenure of any defense secretary, and that doesn't include the nearly two years he served in that post under President Gerald Ford. Rumsfeld is 84.

Sources close to the president-elect say that failing to reappoint
Rumsfeld would be taken as a criticism of his uncle, former president
George W. Bush, whose decision to invade Iraq in the spring of 2003 has
bogged down U.S. forces there in a bloody and ongoing conflict that has
lasted nearly 14 years. "George W. is mighty proud of independent
Kurdistan," said one former official who is close to the Bush family.
"He may have regrets about the Islamic Theocratic Republic of Basra,
particularly since they got the bomb, and the PTCZWBOS Temporary Curfew Zone Where Baghdad Once Stood], but he'll never admit
it."

Rumsfeld does not plan on serving all four years of President-elect
Bush's term, one Defense Department official said today. "As soon as
things turn up, the moment the Green Zone is secured, he's out of
there."

One figure in the outgoing and incoming administrations who argued
strongly for Rumsfeld's retention was Vice President-elect Dick Cheney,
who first worked with Rumsfeld in the Ford administration. Cheney
himself is about to begin his fifth term as vice president, a
record-breaking tenure bought about in part by the decision of his
cardiologists in 2008 that he could not safely be moved from the vice
president's office.

Both Presidents George W. Bush and Jeb Bush periodically found
themselves compelled to mount strenuous defenses of Rumsfeld's lengthy
tenure. In a memorable 2006 news conference, a visibly exasperated
President George W. Bush argued that wartime presidents had
traditionally stuck with their commanders for the full duration of
their conflicts. "Lincoln didn't dump McClellan, and I'm not dumping
Rumsfeld," the president declared, leading the White House press office
to issue its now-famous clarification that the Civil War had actually
ended in 1862.

Rumsfeld's most recent term was marked by controversy over the extended
tours of duty that many of the U.S. soldiers and marines in Iraq have
been compelled to serve. With enlistments in the armed services down to
a trickle, and with Congress unable to find the votes to pass the
so-called Sensenbrenner Plan to staff the armed services with unpaid,
undocumented immigrants, many of the front-line U.S. soldiers in Iraq
have been serving there since 2004, their terms of enlistment
repeatedly extended by Rumsfeld's order.

Since the Mutiny of 2009 Defense Department officials have been
concerned that bringing the "colonial army" home would risk infecting
stateside troops with a crisis of morale. "We're fighting low morale in
Iraq," one general said, "so we don't have to fight it here at home."

Rumsfeld's decision to remain at the Pentagon's helm may not have been
dictated entirely by his desire to stay until the PTCZWBOS is secured.
"Don took a bath when the dollar tanked back in 2005," one prominent
Republican said, "and hasn't done all that well since the dollar was
pegged to the yuan. In the absence of Social Security, he can't afford
to quit."

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

1. I have only one thing to say to this:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!