Text of the greeting card I received from the moving company:

[eyesroll]

(Keep in mind they helped my soon-to-be-former spouse and me move into separate apartments.)

Homecoming
Hoping the season delivers you the gift of togetherness and a home filled with joy and warmth.

OK, so I have a well developed sense of irony, so I laughed pretty hysterically. Still.
:eyes:

[Wickerman]

1. One size fits all

doesn't really work for a big company, huh?

:toast:

to better days!

[Skittles]

2. LOL

glad you took it well, eyesroll. :D

[sundog]

3. This gives me an idea:

A broken home series of Holiday Greeting cards

I'm sure it would do quite well.

He/She Won't Be Coming Home

Hoping the season doesn't sucks too bad. Here's to keeping the bills paid. Try to stay warm. Avoid festive areas that may make you pine for the past.

[eyesroll]

4. Eh. I'm doing OK, thanks...

Still cracks me up, though, the inappropriateness of a whole lot of things that have popped up during this process.

[sundog]

6. glad

you're surviving - was worried a bit about you... next year will be better :hug:

[terrya]

5. Imbiciles! What part of "moving into SEPARATE apartments"...

didn't they understand??

Sheesh. :-)

T

[eyesroll]

7. then again...there was that motivational poster at the divorce court

office...

T ogether
E veryone
A chieves
M ore

(Probably intended for the employees, but visible to the visitors)

[TyeDye75]

8. How dare they say 'may the season'

This is the Lord Jesus Christs birthday... amen

Celebrate your heathen festivals if you must be prepared to spend eternity with Lucifer and all his implements of Evil.

[Magrittes Pipe]

9. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

:D