gtp1976
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Sat Dec-25-04 12:22 AM
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another joke. Funny or not? |
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A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the bag on the counter. The bartender walks up and asks what's in the bag. The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about one foot high, and sets him on the counter. He reaches back into the bag, and this time pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter as well. He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano. The little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a beautiful piece by Mozart.
"Where on earth did you get that?" says the bartender.
The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says: "Here. Rub it."
So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke, and a large genie is standing before him. "I will grant you one wish. Just one wish ... each person is only allowed one!"
The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says, "I want a million bucks!"
A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks and they keep coming! The bartender turns to the man and says, "Y'know, I think your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."
"I know," says the man, "do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"
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TroubleMan
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Sat Dec-25-04 12:23 AM
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1. I like that one....I used to tell a slightly different version |
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but the punchline is the same.
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LiberalVoice
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Sat Dec-25-04 12:28 AM
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TreasonousBastard
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Sat Dec-25-04 12:33 AM
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3. Combined a couple of jokes... |
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besides the 12" pianist, there was the one about the guy who walked into the bar with a head the size of a grapefruit.
Turns out he found the lamp and a gorgeous genie popped out. Made Barbara Eden look like a nerdy boy.
"I can grant you one wish."
"Oh, baby, we gotta make love."
"Nope, can't grant that one."
"OK, how about a little head?"
And ducks?
Duck walks into a store-- "Got any duck food?"
"No."
This goes on for a couple of days until the owner says "You ask that one more time and I'll nail your little webbed feet to the floor!"
Next day the duck walks in "Got any nails?"
"NO!"
"OK, got any duck food?"
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gtp1976
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Sat Dec-25-04 12:39 AM
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the one I heard about the man and his wife.
Man would always ask for sex, wife would always say she had a headache. Finally one night he wised up and offered her a few aspirin. She said, "What for? I don't have a headache." He said, "good, then let's make love." :-)
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NYC
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Sat Dec-25-04 01:15 AM
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A man walked into a bar with a dog. Ordered a drink.
Man to Bartender: My dog talks.
Bartender: Yeah?
Man: Yeah. I'll sell him to you for $10.
Bartender: You dog can't talk.
Dog to Bartender: Please buy me, sir. Please. He beats me, he's mean to me, he starves me. Please buy me, sir.
Bartender to Man: Hey, your dog really does talk! How come you want to sell him for $10?
Man: Because I'm tired of his fucking lies.
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DU
AdBot (1000+ posts) |
Fri Apr 26th 2024, 01:34 PM
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