my seventeen-year-old niece Nairs her arms -- her forearms

[Bertha Venation]

She is extremely self-conscious about her arm hair and removes it regularly with Nair. She also wears long sleeves. Everywhere. Always. No matter the weather.

Yet she has terrible acne, for which a dermatologist treats her, and she's not self-conscious about that.

Anyone ever heard of such a thing?

[Midlodemocrat]

1. My daughter is very self conscious about her forearm hair as well

...but I wouldn't let her remove it. I helped her to bleach it and that seemed to make her happy.

[Bertha Venation]

8. I suggested that my sister bring up bleaching

and she said "ew" and that CB likes her arms smooth anyway.

[Left Is Write]

2. My daughter shaves her forearms.

I think it's a little weird. She's seventeen also.

She winds up with itchy arms from stubble, and I keep asking her WHY she does that. She claims she's too hairy, but her hair is very fine and blonde. I don't get it.

[AllegroRondo]

4. Ouch. Doesnt shaving make it grow in thicker?

[SheilaT]

10. Shaving does NOT make

hair grow back thicker. The stubble feels that way because it's a blunt-cut end, compared to the tapered end of hair that has grown out.

If that worked, no man would ever have to worry about going bald. All he'd ever have to do is shave his head every so often.

[Bertha Venation]

13. Hmm.

It's good to know CB's not the only one.

[Demit]

3. Oh man, I did that for a prom in the 60's. It looked SO stupid. Everybody

has hair on their arms. If you don't have any, it draws more attention than if you'd done nothing! Tell your niece it's much better to bleach it.

[Modem Butterfly]

7. Bleaching- WAIT A MINUTE!

You MUST take into account your neice's skintone. I am rather dark-skinned and have black hair. I used to have a find mustache before I was old enough to let waxing finish it off (wax and tweeze long enough and the hair stops coming in altogether). Before picture day in Middle School, my mother helped me bleach it. I ended up looking like a reject from a "Got Milk?" ad. NOT good- it seemed to take forever for the white lip to go away.

[Eurobabe]

5. if she's dark haired, have her tested for PCOS

could be a hormonal problem with androgens.

[BiggJawn]

6. Is she dark-haired?

That could explain it. More noticable. I wonder if other girls her age do that?

I don't know what to tell you, Bertha, obviously, she's not comfortable with herself...

[Bertha Venation]

11. she's a blonde, just like her mom and her aunts

poor kid. I hope she gets over it.

[Phillycat]

9. I wax, and the hair on my arms is pretty blonde.

I don't do it in the winter, but in the summer I wax my forearms. I just don't like forearm hair. :) I think it's perfectly normal.

[Bertha Venation]

12. Thanks, jane. I'm getting a lot of good info here -- thank you everyone!

:bounce:

[auntAgonist]

28. I wax too. The hair on my forearms has come in a LOT lighter

since I've started doing this. I've always had excess hair. Waxing has been my saving grace. I no longer have to have my eyebrows waxed they don't come in near as unruly as they used to, I just pluch the odd stray once in a while. Facial hair is much about the same. Waxing imho is the way to go. AND it lasts a LOT longer than shaving ever would.

[THUNDER HANDS]

14. she sounds like a weirdo to me

but I used to shave my arm hair when i was a kid, and I'm a boy, so what do I know? :D

[seaglass]

15. My 15yo daughter shaves her arms - and she has light hair.

I think it's very odd but I know there are a lot of guys who shave body hair and I thought that was odd too.

I'm not sure that it's harmful so I don't bug her about it, she doesn't obsess about it - she just likes to be clean-shaven (I think she shaved her stomach once too or maybe she does it all the time).

[redqueen]

16. I don't think the removing the arm hair is a big deal

but wearing long sleeves everywhere, no matter the weather... that I find a bit troubling.

[Bertha Venation]

17. yeah, redqueen, that gets me even more than the hair thing

My niece is the most self-conscious, painfully introverted person I have ever known.

On the one hand I'm glad -- selfishly, I know -- because I know it means she won't date and have sex. I'm paranoid of STDs and pregnancies, let alone rape. The girl & our family have enough problems. But mostly I hope she can get her mind & emotions a little more even before she starts dating. (I didn't date until I was over 30.)

But on the other hand, I used to be exactly like that. It is an extremely difficult way to go through life.

[Phillycat]

18. Are you sure she's not a cutter?

[Bertha Venation]

19. no, but I'm pretty sure my sister would tell me -- if she knew

:scared:

I'm going home in February and I'm spending some time alone with the girl.

[Phillycat]

20. Moms are usually the LAST to know.

I hope to god I am wrong. Please keep us posted. I think it's even worse for girls now than when I was an adolescent--and I was MISERABLE. Fingers crossed that it's just a harmless phase. :)

[Bertha Venation]

21. her whole life is a phase, jane

Her mom and both her aunts have been suicidal. Our mom committed suicide. Environmental crap has contributed but there is definitely a genetic predisposition to major depression & other mental ailments.

I keep very close tabs on everyone even though I'm 2,600 miles away. When I go home and can spend time alone with each of the kids, I'll feel better -- no matter what I learn.

Did you cut? (May I ask?)

[Phillycat]

22. No, that wasn't something that occured to me.

I did use running and tattoos as a way to get into physical pain, so as to avoid the emotional pain though.

And several suicide attempts.

The more people she has in her life whom she knows care about her and love her and that she can confide in, the better. You are doing a good thing. :)

[jukes]

26. good insight, janesez

SI is more common than is realized. & the depalidation might be a bit of disinformation to disguise the reality.

& the 'rents seldom are aware.

this situ is odd enough to warrant discrete & gentle investigation, bertha.

[radwriter0555]

23. She nairs her arms but doesn't wash her face? Amazing... BUT

she can't SEE her face, so she obsesses about her arms, which she CAN see.

The child needs something productive to do.

[Bertha Venation]

24. Where did I say she doesn't wash her face?

Have you ever had pizza-face acne? :eyes:

[Phillycat]

27. Acne is not caused by not washing your face.

And that is a really ignorant and insulting thing to say to the probably thousands of hygenically clean DUer's who've suffered from embarassing and scarring acne. I am not one of them, but my best friend and my mother, both scrupulously clean people who've tried EVERYTHING to make their skin better...well, you've raised my hackles in support of them. Grr.

[auntAgonist]

30. ANYONE with ANY skin problem SEES their face everytime

they look in the mirror. What an IDIOTIC thing to say. NO where in that post was there mention of that young lady NOT washing her face! Your ignorance is glaring! I have roseacea, IT has nothing to do with hygiene either, yet I have horrid breakouts at times, fortunately for the most part controlled by medication. I hope and pray that you don't look with disgust at ANYONE suffering the effects of acne. You'd only serve to hurt them. Again, ACNE VULGARIS has nothing to do with hygiene. Ignorance is always the fault of the one who REFUSES to learn.

auntAgonist.

[bleedingheart]

25. As a woman with Southern European Hair and Northern European skin

I can understand it to some degree.. However I have never shaved arm hair...but I have had electrolysis for the past 22 years and recently have had some laser treatments.....(this is for facial treatment alone...nothing else..)

[barb162]

29. If she Nairs her arms why is she still wearing long sleeves? Is she

embarrassed about her arms in some other way (once the hair is gone that is)

[CO Liberal]

31. If It's Not Heredetary, Maybe She Should See an Endocrinologist

She may have a hormone imbalance.

[Catchawave]

32. As long as she doesn't Nair her "tee-tee" area.....

like my daughter did, and $600 later at the ER. She's fine now, but her "lips" swelled up to grapefruit proportion.

[curse10]

33. I did the same thing when I was a teen

fucking hated hair on my arms as much as hair on my legs. Hell, I still don't like it and wax.

If you are close to her I would ask her about it, but don't be judgmental :-)