I sure hope the freepers got their

[MichaelHarris]

Y2K05 patches installed and put up some canned meat and bullets. What was the deal with that anyway? Did they think that when Jesus returned they would have to shoot him to keep him out of their potted meat?

Next time around, when Jesus comes back maybe they'll set up a screening of the Passion movie and get him to endorse those replica nails.

[BigMcLargehuge]

1. WOOHOO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!!!!!

Man oh man this was funny -

Did they think that when Jesus returned they would have to shoot him to keep him out of their potted meat?

fucking tears running down my cheeks from laughing...

[MichaelHarris]

2. LOL

just popped into my head and I don't even drink.

Seriously though, when the Y2K thing was going on I knew people in Spokane that actually did this stuff. They traded all their money in for gold, had a basement full of food and water and bullets. Had daily canning and prayer meetings. When God didn't show up they seemed so sad.

I was happy cuz I bought their generator and gold for a good profit. Didn't get their canned meat though because we all know thats just blade scrapings.

[nine23]

4. "food and water and bullets..." Oh well. I'll always have Paris...

[MichaelHarris]

10. mmmmmmm

Parid Hilton, potted meat, and the Rapture.

[RandomKoolzip]

6. I was managing a kitchen in late '99 in nAshville, Tennessee.....

And I had several employees of mine tell me that they couldn't guarantee that they'd show up for work on January first, 2000, cuz, y'know, the Rapture might happen and all.

A couple were sweet enough to call out ahead of time.

Fuckin' fundies. I hope the Rapture DOES happen this year, so we can get a hold of their real estate.

[MichaelHarris]

7. That brings up a good question

Does the Family Medical Leave Act cover the rapture? And if so how many months do they give ya?

[RadicalMom]

24. They give you just enough time to find your underwear again.

[MichaelHarris]

26. so there is an

underwear clause in the FMLA?

[RadicalMom]

32. Pardon my ignorance, but que es FMLA? No never mind, I

just figured that out (hits self in head with heel of left hand).

[Fiona]

31. right on...

I wants me a double-wide.

[MichaelHarris]

34. double-wide =

tornado food

[RadicalMom]

22. I gotta get me some o' that potted meat! n/t

[MichaelHarris]

28. I read the ingredients on a can of potted meat once

it said: pork anuses and pig snouts. I'm dead serious, it was an off-brand.

[fortyfeetunder]

36. So how does one eat that type?

I mean does one go for heads (snout) or tails (anus)?

[MichaelHarris]

37. I don't

do the blade scrapings, even when I buy weenies I read every ingredient.

[RadicalMom]

38. OMG! I always said those Vienna Sausages were made of...

piggy dicks and snouts. I didn't know it was TRUE! OK, here's something disgusting from my "archives." My late brother used to like to joke about the new Campbell's Chunky Soups (slogan:"The Soup You Can Eat With a Fork") flavor he was inventing : "Campbell's Asshole Soup - The Soup You Can Eat With A Crochet Hook." I miss him.

[Not_Giving_Up]

3. That's too funny

Somehow though I think they'd be shooting libruls to keep us out of their potted meat (ewww) so that they could make it until Jesus came back.

[Erika]

5. Big Smile :-)

They have their priorities. Potted meat is simple enough that they can maintain a focus.

[MichaelHarris]

9. Hell

most freepers I know need instructions for potted meat.

[MichaelHarris]

8. It's weird though

They stockpile food and bullets to go to heaven, do the angels really need pork rinds and Armour potted meat? How do they know what caliber bullets the angels need?

[Tsiyu]

12. They may have to drive off hordes of heathen first

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink or what you will wear. Is not life more important than food....?"

Guess they didn't read that part of Matthew.

I did put some stuff back "just in case" because I had kids. In any event, it's not a bad idea to have a few supplies in case of emergencies. Some people have to go overboard with EVERYTHING.

Your post is funny. And glad yur woman's safe and sound without the slaying of any dragons or meth heads. :bounce:

[MichaelHarris]

13. T/Y

I have Mormon friends who stockpile and stuff, they say it's for natural disasters.

She's safe, it was only a couple of zombies and we went all "Walter Payton" on them. They so slow, we juked um.

[Tsiyu]

16. good for you

We watched Bubba Ho-Tep tonight. How did you do it without Elvis in a wheelchair?

[MichaelHarris]

18. I've heard of that

movie but haven't seen it anywhere yet.

[Tsiyu]

19. You HAVE to see it

Elvis and JFK are residents in a nursing home fighting a soul-stealing mummy. Best fight scene ever. Well, except for the hospital scene in Kill Bill.

[MichaelHarris]

20. is it at the movies

or on DVD yet?

[Tsiyu]

21. One son gave it to a younger son for Christmas on DVD

So, yeah to the latter.

[MichaelHarris]

23. I'll see if I can find it tomorrow

I dig those kind of movies.

[Lone_Star_Dem]

11. What? Didn't you know Jesus has a thing for potted meat?

:shrug:

[MichaelHarris]

14. I read that book

The Passion of the Potted Meat

[Lone_Star_Dem]

15. I hear Mel Gibson is working on the screenplay.

It's sure to be an epic production!
:silly: :D

[MichaelHarris]

17. LOL

I always wondered, when Jesus comes back do you think the first thing he's gonna want to see is a big death cross? Wonder what he thinks about those guys selling replica nails?

Did Bill Cosby wrap production on "The Passion of the Pudding" yet?

[RandomKoolzip]

25. Wgat about June Lockhart's 'Passion of the 'Depends' Undergarments?"

Or my favorite: Ryan O'Neil's tell-all documentary, "Farrahnheit 9-11."

Of couse, there's also Judge Reinhold's "Passion of the Cool Ranch Doritos" if you're into that kind of thing. It's on DVD, y'know.

[MichaelHarris]

27. hahahahahaha

Bill Oreilly's "Passion of the Loofah"

[RandomKoolzip]

29. Yo- you may joke about O'Reilly, but dat shit's for real, dog.

[MichaelHarris]

33. LOL

this will get me banned but here goes:

"Skinner and the Passion of the Chihuahua"

[solinvictus]

Y2K...

Actually, a lot of the extra foodstuffs we purchased came in handy later in the year as our income was substantially reduced. Food in the pantry (at least if it's bought at sale prices) is like $$ in the bank. We used our canned and dry goods to supplement our meager grocery allowance. Also, disaster can happen anywhere and the chain of supply to a retailer can easily be disrupted. We try to maintain extra stores of canned vegetables, canned meat, and water just in case.

[MichaelHarris]

35. all kidding aside

I have like 3 cans of refried beans. It'll be bad if Jesus comes because I'll be real gassy.

There's only 2 of us so we don't stock up alot on groceries.

[RadicalMom]

39. Look out, you'll be smirking like Bush does. It's just gas with him,

you know. I've been trying to get that word out, so people willunderstand him.

[MichaelHarris]

30. Seriously trolling freepers

you all know you fell for the Y2K deal, your preacher people told you it was the end and you bought it. Did you ever hold them accountable? Did you ask them to buy that generator that sits in your shed now? Will you fall for it again? We are seriously gonna get a laugh out of your dumb-asses for at least the next 1000 years.