Help, I'm being held prisoner by my girlfriend

[Elidor]

I got out tonight after three days and nights at her place.

I guess I brought it on myself. I've spoiled her rotten with affectionate attention and lovingkindness, and I turned her on to green oats (avena sativa) which recently caused her to have ten orgasms in 3 hours.

She was so upset at the prospect of me needing a night to myself that it took an hour of mutual tears and my assurances of rapturous love to extricate myself for a few hours of rest and solitude. I'm spending five nights a week at her place, and I'm starting to feel that I have to beg to have some time alone. She has a hard time understanding that I spent seven years ALONE and I ENJOY solitude, I need it like people need AIR. I love her deeply, but ye gods, I can't sustain the energy level this relationship is requiring. I'm fucking worn out.

I think the capper came a few nights ago when she suggested that we could do the solitude thing "together." Uh...yeah. Group solitude. Could you explain that to me again? It consisted of sitting together in a room reading books, with her diligently ignoring me, and me wondering what the hell was wrong because she didn't tell me about this togetherness solitude thing until after it was over.

Ah, hell, what am I bitching about? There are much worse problems to have. Like not having a girlfriend for seven years. And she's a wonderful lady, a pure delight, a gentle heart, beautiful and sunny, intelligent and artistic, built like a you-know-what and a fantastic dancer into the mix. God, I'm so lucky I can barely comprehend it all.

[Dookus]

1. LOL...

I know exactly what you mean.

I LOVE my boyfriend to death, but after a few days of constant proximity, I *NEED* some time alone. And he doesn't quite get that. He feels hurt when I tell him I want to be alone.

It's a tough one.... I don't know the answer.

[anti_shrub]

2. *opens notepad* *writes down "green oats"*

ahem. Move along now. Nothing to see here.

[baby_bear]

3. ummm, regarding these green oats.....

Are they applied or eaten?

s_m

[Cloud]

5. Yeah

How do these green oats or whatever work? Come again?

[Elidor]

7. Green Oats are eaten in caplet form

Both men and women can eat them. Try three or four caplets about 30 minutes before you want to get it on. You'll notice it when it comes over you. It's a purely sexual high. You feel enhanced arousal if you're making love, but nothing if you're not. It can make it difficult for a man to achieve orgasm, which is usually a good thing in the eyes of women. :evilgrin:

It's better than the big V for helping a guy to go for hours, but the intense pleasure it causes can compromise the whole thing and make you come even quicker sometimes.

Edit: I just realized I should qualify that - it's better in that it's infinitely CHEAPER, but it won't necessarily turn you into Priapus - individual results vary, even from one night to the next.

Try to avoid products that mix other things into the green oats: especially yojimbe, which is merely an irritant rather than an aphrodisiac.

[Skip Intro]

4. and I was all primed for a little bondage thread

please, please man, elaborate just a little on the "green oats" thing...

[Booberdawg]

6. tell me more about the green oats!

inquiring woman needs to know! :P

[Elidor]

8. LOL - all the times I've mentioned green oats and suddenly

Everyone wants to know more! lol! I love spreading the gospel of green oats. Everyone should try it. It's like flooding the world with cheap viagra for men AND women! :D

*individual results may vary.

[Booberdawg]

11. You get them at a health food store?

Hell yes! Did you say - 10 orgasms in 3 hours? :D

[Dookus]

12. *grabs whip and a chair*

Down, Boober! Down!!

[Booberdawg]

13. Can't hold me back Dookus! I'm on a mission now!!

I gotta have some o' this!! Get outta my way!

on edit: do I have to pull out "that" pic again?

[Elidor]

14. ROFL - yes, the health food store

Some no longer carry them thanks to the marketing juggernaut behind Viagra - oats are much cheaper, far too cheap to compete with a $10 pill. Here's a link to some green oats for sale:

http://www.americanherbalcompany.com/proddetail.cfm?prodid=58&brandid=7

[Booberdawg]

15. Thanks!

I have a GNC card - I'll check that out too.

Thought I was gonna have to post that erection killer pic to fight Dookus off. whew! :hi:

[Dogmudgeon]

9. No-Go on the oats

Tried it. Got nuttin', honey.

My own problem is that I have never had a successful love relationship, and my past few "encounters" have been such sphinchter-clenching experiences that I've become convinced that love just does not exist for me -- or even most people. Even in college, just "getting laid" was a Herculean effort.

After a while, I quit the whining and the struggle, and it didn't change a damned thing. Well, I did have less anxiety and more free time, but Miss Wonderful did not materialize.

Actually, she did, but she was "involved".

Sexual misery, I think, comes mainly from misery in love. I'm happy that you and your girlfriend have found each other. With a little luck and a lot of work, you may overcome the recent flood tide of intergender madness. You should give it a try, because otherwise, the species will die out.

But, unfortunately, the last thing I need is a erection.

--bkl

[Elidor]

10. I thought the same thing

That love didn't exist for me. I'm quite surprised to see that I was wrong. It took a lot of patience to find the right woman. I'd just about given up on it, but hope springs eternal. Don't give up on it. Just keep it in the back of your mind so you're ready when it comes along. You'll know it when it hits you.