Please make my neighbors STFU!

[Nevernose]

I live in an apartment, an expensive one, in a nice area of town. The first month here was lovely. Then they moved in.

They have 6 kids in their 3-bedroom aparment. 6 kids who have no discernible bedtime, or volume control. I guess it must be crowded in there, becuase they spend all of their time outside -- ALL of it.

They barbecue (both gas and charcoal) on the covered porch. Once I caught them w/ the gas grill INDOORS. The 5-year-old (a real sweetheart) knocks on my door to say "hi." They stand outside my window, and THEY NEVER SHUT UP.

The father drinks beer, outside, from the time he comes home from work until he passes out. The mother just drinks all day long, period.

The mother once said to me, "I don't see why they say I shouldn't smoke in bed -- I do it all the time."

She also tells me DAILY that, "I don't believe all that bullshit about smoking and drinking being bad for the baby. I got 6 kids already, why should I stop for the one on the way? Doctors are just trying to rip me off, anyway."

She was pregnant until a few weeks ago. Where does she give birth? The bedroom next to mine. It was planned; she had a midwife. Is it wrong of me to think that a rented apartment next to mine is the wrong place for childbirth?

Where does she take the baby when it screams? Outside. Next to my window.

Do they listen to me? No. Do they listen to management? No.

They're in a drunken argument as I write this.

I'm beginning to suffer from sleep deprivation. The noise is so continous, so incessant, I am literally on the verge of tears.

[LittleApple81]

1. Move right now. It won't change. They'll have another baby.

[radwriter0555]

33. It's time to move...

The management isn't obligated to create your peace of mind, unfortunately. This is because some other person could well be completely tolerant of the noise level.

There is NOTHING you can do to change the situation. You have to be the one to move. Talk to the management company, this is just business. One option might be another unit somewhere else, BTW.

But arrange with them to break the lease.

Then, on moving day, call child and family services.

[radwriter0555]

34. Right, DO call the cops during drunken arguments....

why not? You're moving anyway.

[Catherine Vincent]

2. A couple with six kids in a 3 bedroom?

I thought most apartments have a rule about how many people can live in an apartment? My niece and her hubby and their 3 kids lived in a 2 bed-room but once their youngest turned a year, they had to move to a larger apartment or move all together.

I think you should notify the manager.

[Maddy McCall]

3. Can you talk to management about this?

Have you talked to them? Do they know that they are disturbing you?


(This is why I live in a cabin in the woods instead of in an apartment in town. I lived next door to a baptist church for years---your neighbors have NOTHING on my former neighbors. ;-) )

[prolesunited]

4. It sounds like this family needs some serious intervention

that is NOT a healthy environment for children. And judging by your post, just sit tight. They'll probably be evicted any day now.

Good luck and buy some earplugs.

[toddzilla]

7. you might be able to

transfer to another apartment within the complex. talk to the management and tell them what's up. they have a responsibility to keep control of their tenants.

[jus_the_facts]

5. got the same sorta thing happening downstairs from me.......

....it's a fucking nightmare...I can totally relate...I use my headphones a LOT...but it's a freak show down there Man....24/7...and he's only been here a few weeks...so just know...you're not alone in the mad mad mad mad world of apartment hell I promise!! :mad: :grr:

[madmax]

6. I'm so sorry but when I got to the part about

where she gave birth I started laughing and I still can't stop. That's funny.

Sorry, I know it isn't funny for you. I hope you're open to the idea of moving because it's only going to get worse. Baby now will cry every few hours for at least 6 months.

Poor kids, all that smoking and drinking.

Can you sleep with music on? Drown them out.

[jiacinto]

8. Maybe you call Social Services

I am worried about children being trapped in such an environment.

[Nevernose]

10. I WORK for Family & Youth Services, LOL

Apparently they're not breaking any of the laws of this bass-ackward state.

[prolesunited]

12. Oh the irony of that!

Hang in there.

[jus_the_facts]

15. I've lived in two apt. complexes in the last 12 years....

....if you did that then ALL the kids would be institutionalized!! I swear some of the shit I've had to witness...unfuckin'believeable....this idiot is outside right now yellin' into his cellphone....chain smoking outside...where he STAYS ALL THE TIME...loudly whines about his wife non stop while his little boy runs around...then the wife comes over and they yell at eachother and the poor boy...while slammin' beers and the doors...in/out/in/out/in/out...yak yak yak yak....and this place is tame compaired to the last one...there I was downstairs...hearing every move the couple upstairs made...their newborn screaming all hours of the night....woke me up long before it woke them up.....apartment live sucks and none of the management gives a flyin' fuck through a flamin' hoola hoop about anything...if you complain....there's something wrong with YOU...sad but true x(

[einsteins stein]

18. Think twice

and then twice again, before calling Social Services on a family.

You can ruin a family that is functioning, just because you don't like their lifestyle.

Not that I think the neighbors in this case are functioning well, and not that I want to defend them.

This is just an immediate reaction I have whenever I hear someone preparing to call CPS, or any other org. They can do good, but they can screw up a persons life on the basis of a little evidence.

If there is NO other recourse, call them. If you see a child in clear danger, call them. Just think, thats all.

One day, it could be some freep bastard calling about the way you raise YOUR kids...


This has been a public service message from the "Government Workers Aren't Always The Best Judges Of Family Values" action committee.

[Emboldened Chimp]

9. Call the cops

if they won't listen to management. It should shake them up enough to STFU. If not, get the hell out. Good luck.

[Ediacara]

11. call the cops

[thom1102]

32. Variation on a theme...

Talk to your other neighbors, and get them all to call the cops when these putz get too loud. If all of you call the cops often enough, you don't look like the bitchy neighbor. (Child protective services might also be an appropriate phone call, if the parents are too drunk to be able to take care of themselves, I'm sure they aren't able to care for 7 children)

[populistmom]

13. Sorry

Moving might be the only option if they aren't doing anything illegal. These kinds of parents piss me off. I've sacrificed so much to do a decent job with my children. I'm not perfect, but we do have rules (like bedtimes). It keeps them well rested and me sane. The parents sound like they need rehab. Geesh, I feel guilty if I have a drink or two after the kiddies go to bed. I can't even imagine.
Don't have them if you can't raise them!

[Nevernose]

14. Thanks for your responses

It's nice to know that there are semi-normal human beings out there.

Management doesn't care. Occupany rates in Las Vegas are apparently at a record low. My lease doesn't expire until March, so why should they care?

It also bears mention that I feel pretty guilty about even posting this. These are the nicest people in the world. If these folks are inbred rednecks, they're closer to "The Beverly Hillbillies" than to "Deliverance." :-)

Thanks for listening, or rather reading -- I really appreciate the sympathetic ears.

[GalleryGod]

26. It's been a while,but sounds like "Constructive Eviction" to me

In other words-for all intents and purposes, you have been "evicted" from the quiet enjoyment of your apartment. If you indeed, work for the State... Start "burning up the phone lines at work" and get some up to the minute advice on Landlord Tenant Law,PRONTO!

Vaya con dios, my friend!

[gkdmaths]

16. learn to love it.

My GF and I had exactly the same problem a while back when we lived in an apartment. A nice, upper-middle class couple with a pair of sons and an infant moved in above us.

The noise was amazing - and they'd look at us like we had been doing something wrong. After about a year, we finally said something to the manager. Evidently everyone else was complaining about them too.

We finally said "fu*k-it" and bought a house out in the countryside.

In truth, nothing has changed really, except we dont have anyone to complain to when the guy next door mows his lawn when he gets off the night shift or the sunday night parties at the other neighbors place.

And, shit, we bought a brand-new house in a really nice, rural part of BFE. Go figure.

good luck. go out on a date. get a broomstick and start pounding the walls/ceiling.

[jenm]

17. noise cancelling headphones

http://www.sennheiserusa.com/pages/products/aviation/hdc451.htm

[Lone_Wolf_Moderate]

19. I thought my neighborhood was bad.

That sucks. Have you considered moving?

[E_Zapata]

20. I can't even begin to believe any of what you have declared here.

It's like a really bad movie.

god bless you -- but move. soon.

Check the ordinance for the number of people that are allowed to be there. I should think it's 2 people per room. 6 kids, a baby, a mom and a dad. It has to be against the ordinance.

Just tell the landlord you won't say anything if he lets you out of your lease.

[Nevernose]

21. As God is my witness, it's all true.

Even the natural childbirth!

Three kids per bedroom, the baby can stay w/ the parents until 24 months old.

"Just tell the landlord you won't say anything if he lets you out of your lease."
Blackmail. I like it. I like it a lot.

[Elidor]

22. So THAT'S where they moved to...

Seriously, though, I've come to believe the apartment underneath me is cursed. There have been 3 different tenants there in 3 years, and each of them drove me to stomping on the floor, yelling and cursing. I currently live above a small herd of elephants who pound the floor so hard it sounds as if they live on an imaginary third floor above me - because the ROOF SHAKES with their footsteps! They also like to slam the door so hard the building shakes with the reverberations.

Before them, there was a Prussian Drill Team performing complex maneuvers at all hours of the night. They also had a stereo. I used to stomp the floor and call them fuckheads at the top of my lungs. Usually did the trick, but I finally went down and chewed them out face to face.

As for the current buffoon squads (both yours and mine), their time is rapidly approaching. It is our lot to educate them on the finer points of consideration for others, and while we may have to perform this valuable service for free, there is nothing - not even the social contract - that says we have to be pleasant about it.

[Nevernose]

23. Remember--

If you tell anyone what you're going to do, the District Attorney will have proof of "premeditation." :evilgrin:

[NJCher]

24. If I could add a few things

First, the noise cancellation technology is great but only under certain noise conditions (like planes taking off). The best thing is to use them plus input sound you want. I live in a noise-infested hell myself and it works well. I have them hooked up to my computer and play CDs or listen to the radio when it gets too bad outside. When I work outside, I plug them into a portable radio and that also helps. Sometimes I wear earplugs with the noise cancellation and turn up the volume of the radio. Sounds odd but it works.

Next, you could demand that your landlord move you to another unit and absorb the cost if he will not straighten these tenants out. Check the landlord tenant law in your state--easy to do; just go to your local library and you can find the volume. A shortcut would be to see if there are any tenant rights groups in your area.


Cher

[Barad Simith]

25. I have no advice, only empathy

I guess there's some hope for you, because you live in an expensive apartment - these people might not last long. Mine's a shithole, so the managers will never even pretend to care what happens here. I am surrounded by loud, stupid, white-trash chain-smokers. I bake in here in the summer, because opening the windows means breathing their second-hand smoke. None of them have jobs, and like your neighbors, they never shut up.

I'm sorry I don't have any advice. Even though my situation is not as bad as what you've described, I know how you feel.

[REP]

27. Flamethrower

"Special" Kool-Aid

Okay - move into a different apartment in the complex?

I'm knocking wood as I speak, but I've never had to endure that kind of bullshit for more than a few hours, when a neighbor's DemonSpawn nephew visits and s c r e a m s for fucking hours. How parents put up with that, I'll never know (thanks be).

[LynneSin]

28. You need to address the issue

Moving shouldn't have to be an option. Moving is expensive and they are the ones causing the problems.

I've been there before and you can fix this problem

First - talk to your other neighbors. They may also have the same issues and hopefully you can all band together when you move on to the next steps. If you do this solo it'll be "US vs. Them" and you'll get no where.

Second - talk to your neighbor. Gather up all the information you have and a few of your neighbors who might also have issues and gently approach them. Tell them you're trying to resolve this issue without getting the management involved. Asked that they have their kids turn down/off the music at a reasonable time each night. Be kind and gentle when talking to them and explain to them that you're hoping to resolve the issues in a friendly manner and how you would prefer not getting outside help from apt. management. Most times this solves the problem. These noisy neighbors may not be aware that the rooms are not soundproofed and might just need a gentle reminder from the neighbors for them to keep the kids intact. But also remind the noisy neighbors that if the noise continues to be a problem that you will get the apartment management involved to solve the problem

Third(if necessary) - If they do not do anything about the noise then address this to the apartment management. You may even want to address your concerns about them using an outdoor BBQ indoors (BTW, check your lease - some places forbid those things being used too since they can be a major fire hazard in apartment complex). Once apt. management gets involved make sure your neighbors are aware that if it still continues you'll get the police involved (i'd stay away from threats to CPA, let the police handle the matter).

Fourth - if after 2 warnings they still refuse to act then get the police involved. End of discussion. I had noisy neighbors that had parties every night of the week. I tried to be nice but after 2 weeks of promise that they'd keep the noise down I called the cops. 2 days later they moved out.


And ps - call your local redcross for information about how dangerous careless smoking, especially in bed, really is. I've volunteered for redcross disaster recovery and believe me this was one of the biggest issue with all the apartment fires we dealt with. One of the other ones - careless use of appliances (aka - that damn grill).

[leftyandproud]

29. Do this

You may want to consider investing in a decent ($200-$300) sound system with some nice quality speakers. Put it on the wall where most of the noise comes from, pointing towards the center of your room...and play some nice classical music to drown out the noise. Keep the radio on the classical channel, or any channel really...but I found classical CDs to be the least distracting...They drown out the sound and help you relax. If the neighbors get REALLY loud one day, turn the speakers towards the wall and blast your stereo at full blast...When they see how easily the sound goes through walls, they might be more considerate. If this fails, the next time they get into a fight, call the cops...It's a noise violation, and a domestic disturbance...The cops probably won't do anything except scare them a bit and tell them to keep it down, but they WILL get the message. If it happens again, give the cops another call...and keep complaining to the landlord--Tell him/her that you planned to renew the lease for another 12 months and refer your brother/sister to the apartment complex, but have reconsidered since nothing is being done about the noise. Money is a good motivator, and if the landlord thinks he will be losing you, referrals from you, and possibly your other neighbors, they WILL do something about it.

[davsand]

30. May I suggest the Wiliam Tell Overture?

I found it worked wonders at 5 AM with the awful neighbor who cranked his stereo to max volume every night at 1:30 AM. He tended to favor crap music and that made it even more painful to endure.

I tried talking to him about it, and he got rude with me. I figured it must really suck to wake up EARLY after you wnt to bed so late. Nothing like a bit of nice classical music to get going in the morings!

Laura

Oh--and for the loud downstairs neighbors? Take up dribbling a basketball whenever you go from room to room. It is a big hit!

[Padraig18]

31. Call the police

You've tried the in-person and management route, which is all a reasonable person could ask of you. The police will sort them out, and will probably make a social-service notification, as well.

Think about the kids.

[tkulesa]

35. Check your lease

Most apartment complexes use some variation on a standard lease. One of the clauses in there will state that it is a violation of the lease to cause disturbances that affect other tenants.

Your neighbors signed the same lease. So if your lease contains that clause then they are in violation of their lease.

Remind your buidling managment of this. It gives them leverage to get those people out.