Whats the most unromantic thing a partner has done after sex?

[madison2000]

How about getting up to read Fortune magazine...

:freak: :freak: :wow: :freak:

[arcane1]

1. talked?

:evilgrin:


current partner is excluded from the above smart-assedness :loveya:

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. asked "What are you thinking?"

ugh.

[Bouncy Ball]

15. Don'tcha hate that?

[vixengrl]

62. Oooh, I hate that question. (mini-rant on subject)

There is no right answer. You can say "Nothing." In my case this is usually true. I just happen to have a thoughtful face, but really I'm zoned out or listening to music or whatever. This is greeted with skepticism if not suspicion. Of course you're thinking about something. If I try "Oh, just thinking how happy I am, being with you," it sounds insincere, because it was insincere if I had no intention of ever saying any such thing except in response to a trick (yes, I said it, trick question). And it's regarded as such. Or I can blow it off. "I'm thinking about increased tax revenues would naturally fall out from raising the wage base through a living wage proposal..." in the most deadpan voice I have. Still a strike. You are never given a walk on that question.

[Rabrrrrrr]

64. Nope, there is no right answer to that question at all.

It is, as you say, a trick question.

Like asking someone "Do you still beat your wife?"

No way to answer it.

[Q3JR4]

85. OMG (lots of drama here ;)

My ex used to ask me that not only after sex. I would go to his house to pick him up (or vice-a-versa) and that would be amongst the first things he'd ask me.

[Q3JR4]

92. On further edit to my last post,

My post seemed to start out with lots of drama.

Just wanted to clarify.

[sleipnir]

97. Worst question ever. It's a killer

I know of more relationships that have ended sometime after this question has been asked. Generally, shit hits the fan about 10 minutes after.

Worst question ever, and if you want the truth, trust me you don't.

[AngryAmish]

115. Always say "I was thinking about Debbie"

Debbie was your most recent ex-girlfriend.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

3. Made himself a sandwich

[Rabrrrrrr]

4. Asked, "So - cash or credit?"

[BrklynLiberal]

5. ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!

[LincolnMcGrath]

12. ROTF

[BrainRants]

23. I'll have to try this one...

n/t

[cestpaspossible]

54. Good thing she took IOUs, eh?

[edbermac]

Called up their spouse?

That definitely puts a damper on things...

[tavalon]

83. Not if you're poly

I would only get annoyed if I didn't get to say hi.

[davidinalameda]

6. you mean you all have partners?

wow

I'm impressed

yes, it's been about a month for me

:grr:

[madison2000]

9. you can answer the question if you've ever had a partner

do something unromantic after sex

[Q3JR4]

86. I don't,

it's going on three years for me.

(And the category for most pathetic person on the thread goes to...)

:P

[MonkeyFunk]

7. Said, "I'm glad we're done. I really have to go to the bathroom"

Thanks for sharing. Glad I could be of assistance.

[LincolnMcGrath]

8. Showed me a pic of her Hubby

I keed I keed

[Bouncy Ball]

10. Threw me a wad of tissue.

[Bouncy Ball]

17. But I guess that's better than one woman I know

whose husband throws her a dirty hand towel.

:puke:

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

81. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww....... ROFLMAO

[asthmaticeog]

11. Injected large doses of antibiotics.

:shrug:

[SemiCharmedQuark]

13. Asked me if I could find the pimple that was bothering him

[Misunderestimator]

77. Ew... That WINS in my book!!

[jackelope72]

14. I swear to God, he actually said:

"Wow! I'm definitely gonna get that divorce now!"

I had no idea he was married. Just goes to show, ya gotta really do some digging into the person's life before you take that big step.

BTW, my reply to him: "Don't bother. Now, get off of me, I'm going home."

[chelsea0011]

16. got a back slap for finishing first

being #1. didn't that use to be good?

[Bouncy Ball]

18. I thought of another one with a former partner

Got up and said "Well Lisa, I really have to run."

(My name isn't Lisa.)

[madison2000]

21. ROTFLMAO!!

:hi:

[AngryAmish]

25. I've only done that twice

[DawgHouse]

60. HISTERICAL!

:wtf:

[SemiCharmedQuark]

19. Compared me to his last skanky whore of a girlfriend.

[kuozzman]

20. Told me she was volunteering for the Chimp campaign the next day

I got dressed and left.....

:wtf:

Just kidding(about the second part)

[Tweed]

132. You shouldn't be!

[Joe Power]

22. Broken up with me

I lived. ;)

[LiberalinNC]

24. Made me sleep on the wet spot!

;)

[BrainRants]

26. Windows screensaver kicked in.

[Q3JR4]

88. ROTFL

[SemiCharmedQuark]

27. You'd probably have a shorter thread of romantic things done...

if my crappy love life is anything to go by.

[complain jane]

28. 1) Told me to make him dinner.

2) Called me ex's name.
3) Called ex on phone.

On edit: #1 was one person, #'s 2 and 3 were another.

[WilliamPitt]

29. I hesitate to tell this story

but one time in college, in the middle of my giving...erm...the 'oral pleasures' so to speak, she...well...she passed gas. Profoundly. Blew my hair back from my brow.

I guess that is a 'during' story, instead of an 'after' story.

[iconoclastic cat]

31. Poor bastard.

[Bouncy Ball]

40. Oh my God.

I would be mortified if I were her. That is a nightmare.

Um, can I ask how one handles such a situation? I mean, do you just pretend it didn't happen or say "Well THAT kinda destroyed the mood, didn't it?"

:shrug:

[madison2000]

43. I'm sure she hopes he's forgotten it by now...

[Bouncy Ball]

44. BWA!

But it looks like he probably never will and who can blame him?

Urg.

[redqueen]

50. BWAHAHA!

Will, you know that had to be on purpose! Who doesn't know that's coming? Especially at a delicate time like that?

What did you do to her, anyway?! ;)

[SarahB]

71. Maybe take it as a compliment?

You were so good that she just completely lost control. :shrug:

[name not needed]

73. I found something even more disgusting.

Warning, this story is probably the most disgusting thing you may ever read. Don't click it if you object to bodily functions and graphic descriptions of bad sexual experiences.

http://www.tuckermax.com/tuckertriesbuttsex.html

[Bouncy Ball]

89. Ok I'll admit I read that

and yes it was disgusting, but was it bad that I laughed really hard, too?

[madison2000]

94. thats the most disgusting thing I've ever read

even the smells were coming through... :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:

[kick-ass-bob]

102. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

82. OMG! How embarassing, er, for her!

[Lex]

87. Hmmm. Back in college, eh?

Too much beer for her that evening, mayhap?

[davsand]

93. OMG! I know the perfect date for her!

I dated a guy (a journalism student, BTW) who got a bit carried away and started farting on every in-stroke.

Imagine if you will, some guy trying to be all macho with this "I'm gonna fu...thzzzbt...ck you like you have nev...thzzzzbt...er been before!"

I started laughing and couldn't quit. He got really pissed off at me for laughing.

He called several times after that and I just couldn't deal with him. It wasn't the farting thing so much as the fact that he had ZERO sense of humor. I just can't deal with anybody without a sense of humor--especially when it comes to sex.

Seems to me that he'd be a great match for that girl. They could fart and NOT laugh together. Just better hope nobody around them is a smoker, however...


Laura

[Liberal Veteran]

30. If you happen to tell the story about that little "gag reflex" incident...

....it was more the gin and tonics that caused that, and I am still embarrassed.

[sonicx]

32. "Oh, sorry babe. Maybe next time."

:D

[Jessica]

33. Ummm ... how 'bout a Dutch Oven?

How's that for romance??? Needless to say, we're no longer together. Idiot.

[redqueen]

51. Um

What's a "Dutch Oven"?

[Jessica]

58. It's when ...

someone *passes gas* in bed & then pulls the covers tight above your head & won't let you out. I hate it hate it hate it.

[madison2000]

106. ok. I learned something here

But this "sex" thread seems to be turning into a "bodily function" thread! :puke: :bounce: :toast: :silly: :hurts: :boring: :spank:

[youngred]

34. "maybe we should see other people"

after 4 months of dating. Kinda took the happy glow off

[BiggJawn]

90. Yeah, that does suck...

Needless to say, we didn't do it 6 times that night...

[youngred]

117. we ended up having sex the next day

and a year later on my birthday with my then-gf (they're surprise present). And I just found out recently she's getting married so that'll be about it

[BiggJawn]

119. No more 3-ways?

Maybe she'll talk her new hubby into a 4-way!

[youngred]

120. who knows

she moved away after college and I went away to college so we're rarely in the same area, but who knows :evilgrin:

[vpigrad]

35. Said "You know I don't love you."

That was after my first time. It's been downhill since then.

[Bouncy Ball]

41. GEEZ

[KittyWampus]

57. Harsh!

[donheld]

80. You shoulda said

"that's ok it wasn't that good anyway."

[dr.strangelove]

36. I once called my roommate to tell him how good it was.

I just finished. Rolled over and grabbed the phone. She asked what was up. I called and told my friend who I was with and what we just did, in very graphic terms.

That was during the dark years when I was a very bad person. That was over 10 years ago. I can't believe I did that now. Believe it or not, I am still somewhat friendly with the girl. My wife and her are friends.

[Bouncy Ball]

42. WHAT A PIG!!!

Just kidding. Glad to hear you've "reformed." Man I woulda smacked you, gotten dressed, and left! LOL!

[dr.strangelove]

100. I was a Pig!!

It was really tasteless of me. The girl was very angry. At first she thought it was a joke, but when she heard the voice on the other end of the phone, she started to throw pillows and clothes at me. She kicked me out. Don't blame her at all.

I only did it because the girl was way out of my league. My friends and I had this girl on a pedestal. That one of us could have sex with a girl as beautiful as her was unthinkable. It is a poor excuse for ignoring a very nice person's feelings. She eventually forgave me after a significant amount of groveling and begging.

This is one of those things I really wish I could change. It was during the drug and heavy drinking part of my college life. I did all kinds of stupid and immoral things then.

[Bouncy Ball]

109. Hey, didn't we all?

And if that's the WORST thing you've ever done, you're doing pretty good!

[Heddi]

37. Well, I vomited after me and my husband did it once

ha!

He was rolling over for seconds and I just bolted out the bedroom.

He didn't know what was going on. He's like "So, are you in the mood for more?"

I said 'Raalllfffffffff"

He said "Oh. My. God. Was it that bad?"

I said "Hurrrrrrrrghggghhh"

He cried

I puked

It took years..YEARS of reassuring him that I was very ill and it just hit me right at that time, and that I wasn't puking because of his sexual performance or propisition...but rather from a vile stomach flu that hit me then and stayed with me for a week. I think he still has a complex, though.

[Red State Rebel]

65. Oh no!!!!!

Poor guy, I can see getting a complex after that!

[Arbustosux]

38. Let loose a series of VERY loud Varts

mmmmm....that sound is just soooooo romantic! ;)

[Heddi]

45. ha ha. I love when that happens

I asked my anatomy teacher if there was a clinical term for Queefs, and she looked at me and said "you have alot of time on your hands to wonder that".

She never answered me, and I still am dying to know.....

But like I tell my husband...when air goes in, it HAS to come out somewhere, and unless he wants to install a pressure valve somewhere, he's just gonna have to deal with the queef ha ha

[Bouncy Ball]

49. Oh now THAT's different

and I just got that they spelled it with a "v," that's the first time I've ever heard of varts.

Queefs are just funny.

Did I really just type that out?

Urg, I have to get out of this thread!

[Skittles]

67. ya, even farting a symphony

no freaking good

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

72. Queifs is the technical term...no?

[Nikia]

39. Not sure

My husband and I have been together 7 years and have had sex often. We have done almost every sort of things people do in their lives right after sex.

[johnnie]

46. I got up once afterwords

And grabbed my wallet, pulled out a buck and tossed it on the bed. LOL She laughed though, that's my humor.
I don't know what was ever done to me though.

[Bouncy Ball]

47. How about the most unromantic thing YOU'VE ever done right after?

I think I once immediately said I need to call my mother (unrelated to what had just happened). But he was a bit offended that I was already thinking of my to do list and he had just barely finished.

Another time.....er......I, uh, thought I heard my boyfriend coming (yeah, cheating a bit) and I left so fast, the guy probably didn't even know what happened. I just heard him say "Wha?"

[Red State Rebel]

66. Got dressed and told him it was a good thing I didn't throw away

my, uh, "battery operated device" when I met him.

It was the 2nd time and he was a selfish jerk with absolutely NO conern for my gratification. I thought maybe the first time was nerves or something....

[noshenanigans]

69. I said "hey, would you mind sleeping on the couch?"

What can I say, he wasn't getting the job done, and I was 20.

[fleabert]

48. Threw up. too much wine and too much motion do not work well together.

we ended up marrying, btw. one time event. :-)

[Deja Q]

52. See you later.

[cestpaspossible]

53. Called her 'driver' to pick her up.

[Ariana Celeste]

55. LOL. Oh, man.

1) My current: Pulled out as fast as he could to try to make me queef, it worked. :eyes: Men will be boys. :D
2) ex: Put his pants back on and went back to playing GTA- which he had been playing for hours beforehand.
3) Current: Got up and did a naked dance, penis a flyin'. Unromantic but cute and funny as hell!:D

[slutticus]

56. Sprung a leak.

*snicker*

[bettyellen]

59. He said, "Eh, why don't we just get married already?"

dumbest. question. ever.

[HeyManThatsCool]

61. Fell Asleep

and 5 minutes later he.....

PEED. THE. BED


Sadly up until that second it had been one of the greatest nights of porn type sex ever. I guess all the beer at the frat party earlier that night, added to the hard workout, left him unable to control his bladder.

I never looked at him the same after that. I was always nervous to fall asleep or lay in bed with him after that.
It was over 3 weeks later.

[noshenanigans]

63. on our last night before he was going on "vacation" to Thailand..

(he now lives there, btw, but this is when he was going to visit for what ended up being a month.)

He said "by the way, I can't make any promises I won't sleep with anyone else while I'm there."

WTF ever, man. I really regret not breaking up with him right then.

[NewJeffCT]

121. Should have said

Should have said that you couldn't make any promises that you won't sleep with anybody while he's gone...


Sorry to hear that happened to you.

[noshenanigans]

123. Well, my actions spoke louder than words..

In some kind of weird karmic payoff, he came back and said "I stayed true to you", meanwhile I had been sleeping with my best friend that he was always jealous of.

Oh well. :shrug:

[NewJeffCT]

125. LOL

I hope the guy is a Republican.

But, if I ever intended to cheat, I can't imagine saying something like that. That's just giving the person an excuse to dump you. But, the times I've been away on business trips and probably could have found opportunities, I did not seek them and was too tired, anyhow.

[noshenanigans]

127. The guy was a jerk..

He's the guy that has a huge SUV and likes to tailgate little cars.

I honestly don't know what my problem was that I stayed with him for as long as I did, but I have, like, radar for jerky guys.

[NewJeffCT]

129. lots of women do

Not sure how old you are, but younger women especially seem to be attracted to the jerky types, while nice guys finish last. At least that is how it was when I was in my teens & 20s.

[noshenanigans]

130. I'm 25 now..

I was 23 when I was dating him (and he was 30). As I've matured I think I've come around to what the nice guy has to offer.

I just had (and still do to a lesser extent) the ability to read complete egotism as self-confidence, while egotism more often than usual simple overcompensated for lacks in other areas.

[mitchum]

68. I have a friend who got out of bed and started rolling pennies...

in coin wrappers. And he still can't understand why she got pissed.

[madison2000]

78. ok, that's worse than reading Fortune!

[Undercover Owl]

79. that's bad!

unspoken thought...my penny collection means way more to me than you do, babe.
LOL!

[Taxloss]

70. Text-messaging a friend. Within seconds.

As if they desperately had something to share.

I must admit, I freaked. "WHAT ARE YOU WRITING? WHAT? WHAT?"

[Jesus H. Christ]

74. He had to fix the bed.

After we (well, mostly he) broke it. It wasn't rude or anything, just really unromantic with him swearing and griping about dustbunnies.

[SarahB]

75. Let's not go there.

Too many years of it. I will just make sure as much as possible any future lovers are compatible before I do would anything with them.

[Undercover Owl]

76. so unsexy!

I thought I really liked this guy, but he turned out to be really unappealing in bed: hiding his weiner from me, acting embarrassed.

During the act, he hardly moved his body at all. Then suddenly, in a ho-hum voice he said "I'm done".

That was about as fun as scrubbing the toilet.
I never took his call again.

[Bouncy Ball]

91. "hiding his wiener from me"

ROFL!!!! Why in the world????

(Post script: I think everyone, at one point, has to be with someone really supremely bad. I mean BAD at it. My really BAD one was so bad, I didn't even consider for a SECOND becoming his Personal Tutor. No, I knew about 7 seconds into it that this would be the first and last time unless he improved dramatically immediately. He did not. Let's just say he had the strangest sense of rythym of anyone I have ever known. I never knew where he was going with his rythym. It was so damn confusing. And he was so into it, he just screwed his eyes shut REALLY TIGHT and it was like I wasn't even there. Ug. Get me the hell outta here.)

[WMliberal]

84. woken up

[DaveinMD]

95. farted

[CO Liberal]

96. Went Home

:-)

[HEyHEY]

98. Said "Hey where are you going?"

Some chicks just don't dig romantic whimsy

[shesemsmom]

99. My first Hubby was stupid

after sex he had to fart, took a lighter to his naked ass and light it and farted, burnt all the hair off his butt hole. I decided right then I needed a DIVORCE>

[TyeDye75]

107. High-larious... rolmfao...../nt

[Allenberg]

101. Not so much disgusting

as funny. After providing "oral stimulation"...had a hair stuck in her teeth.

:o

[underpants]

103. Faking illness to go watch the SEC championship game

Oh my partner not me :evilgrin:

[regularguy]

104. I (accidently!) locked a woman out of her own bedroom...

Many moons ago in college, a friend of mine and I left a party really drunk and headed back to her apartment. After fun, drunken fooling around she went to the bathroom and the bedroom door locked behind her. I passed out and no amount of banging would wake me up. She slept in a winter jacket only (no blanket) on the couch. She sorta forgave me, I think...

[meisje]

105. He repeatedly smacked me in the face with his penis!!!

Well.... no, I'm only kidding. I'm not even a woman and I'm not gay, not that there's anything wrong with that! I'm really just a uhhhh child living in a mans body... and I uhhh think jokes about the penis are funny.

[TyeDye75]

108. That does actually happen

Where I live people call it Tonking... I remeber when I was at college a female friend of mine became a laughing stock for two weeks after getting a black eye from it.

[Bouncy Ball]

111. I've often said if I could just have a penis for one day

I'd go around just smacking people with it. Just because I could.

Take THAT! And THAT!

I don't know why I would want to do that. The power of the penis, I guess. I would be the biggest PIG of a man, I swear.

[madison2000]

113. I would pee everywhere, just because I could.

:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:

[Bouncy Ball]

114. Oh that too!!!!

I'd go around peeing on trees, trashcans, mailboxes. Just because.

I'd be such an ass. "Get over here, let me slap you with my penis!"

[Beer Snob-50]

110. while giving me a hand job

slicing me open with the diamond on her hand. (it was accidental but still unromantic!!)

[Bouncy Ball]

112. I have a friend who said

she was just surfing the internet one night, both kids asleep in bed, when suddenly she felt something in/on her ear.

She turned and her husband had been sticking it in her EAR!

She said "What in the hell are you doing?"

He looked a bit embarrassed and said he saw it in a movie one time and just wanted to see what it felt like to put his penis in her ear.

I guess it didn't work out the way he imagined.

[madison2000]

116. That would be called "aural sex" right?

:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

[Renew Deal]

133. I've got to try that one.

lol

[TN al]

118. She said...

..."Tell the next guy he can come in now."

[Ganja Ninja]

122. A girl friend bit me on the cheek of my ass once.

I'm sure it was meant to be playful but the pain level was something similar to slamming your finger in a car door. She must have gotten a nerve or something because it hurt like hell. It was the type of pain that shoots up your spine.

[ronnykmarshall]

124. Called me "girlfriend".

[motely36]

126. Told me his name

:P

[catzies]

128. Rushed to the TV to turn on the NBA playoffs.

Oh wait, that was me. :evilgrin:

[Name removed]

131. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

134. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[goodbody]

135. AFTER sex, you say?

hmmm. Does that mean Real Sex or Cyber Sex?

Flesh Sex or Fantasy Sex?

[Moderator]

136. Locking

That's enough.