"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"

[KurtNYC]

No. I did not hit a pedestrian nor did I write that sentence.

These are from a collection of the things people write on insurance claims related to auto accidents. Classics:

Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."

"The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him."

"The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end."

"A truck backed though my windshield and into my wife's face."

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment."


Many more: http://rinkworks.com/said/insurance.shtml

[LDS Jock]

1. I've seen some of these before, but they always crack me up

thanks for the link.

[MissMillie]

2. too funny!

# "I was on the way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."

[LDS Jock]

3. reminds me somewhat of the church bulletin mistakes

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone come for a fun time.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7:00 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.

Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.

and many more http://www.ouryouthgroup.com/funnybulletins.html

[KurtNYC]

5. Liked those

Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor.

Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.

[Donkeyboy75]

4. That's about as unbelievable as

stories about Keith Moon and babysitters.

[billyskank]

6. My favourite is:

"I had to swerve several times before I hit the gentleman."

[billyskank]

7. Ooh, ooh! I forgot:

"The accident was caused by me waving to the man I hit last week."