"I hear you from tone of bitch:" Most unintentionally funny subtitles

[Elidor]

The above was an english subtitle from Monster, where a guy says, "I see you're from Daytona Beach."

"One day the bitch party is over." "Whole white world." Dirty words are cleaned up, but clean words suddenly become, "Asshole." "Fuck them" becomes "Fuck you."

I laughed my ass off. The whole movie was butchered in translation. I swear the subtitle guy was Japanese. You can tell from his translations–L sounds were habitually confused with R sounds. Here's this horrible murder story, and you're laughing your ass off at the translations, which have nothing to do with what the characters are really saying. One of the main characters, Selby, was always translated as "Sovy."

Priceless. Any others?

[Lydia Leftcoast]

1. The subtitles on a Japanese movie called The Makioka Sisters

were mostly pretty good, but in one scene, the maid could be heard moaning and groaning in the next room, and the actual dialogue runs something like this:

"What's wrong with the maid?"
"Oh, she has a splinter."

But what the subtitle said was, "Oh, she has a sprinter."

[Elidor]

2. I'm not going to touch that one :)

Oh, temptation

[Lydia Leftcoast]

3. Why else do you think I thought it was funny?

;-)