An Open Letter to the DU Lounge

[CO Liberal]

My wife posts something referring to her family as being "white trash", and she gets flamed. I come to her defense and I get flamed. Yet someone else can post something about "rednecks" and people think it's funny.

Do you see a double standard here?? Well, I sure as hell do.

What gives anyone here the right to make someone else feel bad?? Why are some people constantly attacking me and my wife, and nothing is done about it? Why do other DU-ers do nothing, and sit by as silent witnesses to this abusive treatment?

I honestly believe that much of the abuse heaped on my wife had occurred after she posted her picture, and people decided to attack her because of her size. If she were thin, she never would have gotten the crap she's gotten.

And you know what? The Princess is proud of who she is, and I'm proud to call her my wife. And if some of you have a problem with a fat woman and the man who loves her, then that's YOUR problem.

If you don't see any posts from me after this, it's because of the shabby treatment we've been getting around here lately. I hope you people are proud of yourselves.

CO Liberal

[redsoxliberal]

1. good God

bye.

[Name removed]

3. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[redsoxliberal]

5. that's somewhat amusing

seeing as I haven't talked to you (bar the racist thread yesterday) since you conceeded that you hate children, which was months ago.

If you're complaining about something that happens one every few months... good god.

[Name removed]

14. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[redsoxliberal]

16. ok... you hate sub-18 posters at DU

better?

[CO Liberal]

20. I Don't Hate Anyone

But as a 52-year-old man, I refuse to regard a 16-year-old as my equal, or my intellectual peer. There's just too much of a lack of life experience in teh under-18 crowd.

[Wat_Tyler]

23. Let's keep away from the personal attacks, CO Liberal.

That won't help matters.

[Name removed]

4. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Blue Gardener]

2. Put the mean people on Ignore

That's what I do.

[JanMichael]

6. Yep!

Seriously, just go through that post, and put the people you can't stand on "ignore."

It really does work; just don't be tempted to log out and "peek." (this is Stephanie, not Michael btw---) I log out and peek all the time!!

Steph

[Taverner]

8. I second that

Just like life, in DU you are bound to piss someone off, or someone is bound to piss you off. Some people's chemistry is just that way.

Put the posters who attacked you on ignore, and post what you want. As long as you don't come accross freeperish (and you guys never do) who cares what other people say?

[name not needed]

7. Here we go AGAIN.

[redsoxliberal]

11. exactly.

[Bluebear]

9. I did not see said post......

but man alive I enjoy having you both as part of the gang. Please please put the offenders on your ignore button, that is what it is there for. I can't guarantee no one will ever treat you shabbily on an internet message board but I do guarantee that your voices are as important as anyone's.

[RevolutionaryActs]

10. I hope the two of you keep posting.

I love your posts, and I think Princess is hilarious!

I'm sorry some people get over zealous and think this is GD. Please stay! :cry:

[NightTrain]

12. I, for one, would miss having you around.

However, I certainly would understand if you left DU. Truth be told, I've thought about it myself!

[XanaDUer]

13. She was *flamed* for that joking post!?

I never went back to look at it-I cannot imagine why she would be flamed-but does not surprise me.

I don't come onto DU too much anymore-it has seemed to turn into a place where some come onto here to just kick each other around.

So yeah, use ignore. I used to say I never would use it-now I click it all the time. But I could understand if you want to leave. Sorry your feelings got hurt. I know how you feel.

[Name removed]

17. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[XanaDUer]

18. Let me put it this way

at one time, DU was my lifeline. I used to think it would be great to go to a meetup.

No more.

:hug:

Sorry about what happened to you and your wife.

[Wat_Tyler]

15. As long as people think about and take responsibility for what they post,

there shouldn't be much of a problem. Not sure what any of this has to do with your wife's size, though. You wouldn't be using that to guilt people would you?

I'd advise against developing a martyrdom complex. It never works out the way you want it to.

Hope you can resolve your issues.
Wat.

[Misunderestimator]

19. I agree that both threads bordered on offensiveness...

I do hope you aren't including me in this address simply because I pointed out that some people find the term "white trash" offensive and shouldn't be surprised if people express their feelings about it.

[Bouncy Ball]

21. I don't understand the whole weight angle.

As for those of us who "sit by as silent witnesses to this abusive treatment" first of all, this is a voluntary board. You have to allow yourself to be "abused" here, being as there are ignore buttons, hide thread buttons, etc.

I guess I'd be one of the silent ones. But that's because I miss a lot of those threads. And when I do see one that looks like a flame-fest, I don't tend to get involved.

And this place is, IMO, what you make of it. I find it to be a great place. I take what's good and leave the rest. If I truly felt persecuted by some people, I'd first try to figure out what patterns in my own behavior might be contributing to it (since my own behavior is the only one I can do anything about) and then, if needed, I would put them on ignore. Period.

[Moderator]

22. Locking...

If you do not like someone, the proper resonse is to ignore them.

If you would like to make a complaint about a certain member, use the alert function.

Do not flame them back.

The moderators delete ALL personal attacks without regard to who posted them or whom they are about. None of the moderators have treated you unfairly.

If you have a comment or a complain about DU policy, please direct it to the Administrators.


Thank you.

DU Moderator