th e-mail exchange between the the Ultimate Warrior and the web guy

[Zuni]

on the Top 10 Idiots page (it is a link) is so funny I almost wet myself

[autorank]

1. You mean "lowtax" of somethingawful.com. That was amazing.

That's my other favorite site on the internet...DU being my home page.

[Zuni]

2. It was a riot

this whole Ultimate Warrior buisness is one of THE funniest, most memorable battles with modern RWers that I can remember

[Heidi]

3. Lowtax is some kind of genius. Jury's still out on what kind, though. eom

[autorank]

6. Zuni & Heidi: lowtax is a "genius for our times."

He won me over with his JeffK persona in the mid/late 1990's. He'd actually go out and hack obnoxious sites as JeffK, uber gamer and haxor. He took over a swingers site for about three days. The dyslexic and smart ass JeffK taunted site users while maintaing contrnol. It was just hilarious. I've got JeffK's site as a URL in my profile. The SA forums are also quite entertaining and strange.

:hi: to both of you.

[Heidi]

7. I've laughed for hours . . .

at the pranks section of SA. Have you seen JeffK's website at SA?

[autorank]

10. Oh yeah, it's in my DU profile. Keep waiting for someone to ask me

if I'm JeffK (haha). Did you ever read GeistMag or l'il cowpoke. Those were on his web ring in the 90's. God, they were good! They're both gone but the editor of Geist is now with SA. :hi:

[Heidi]

11. Never heard of GeistMag or l'il cowpoke . . .

but my husband is a techie and he introduced me to SA. We will never have kids because they could easily grow up to become JeffK, so we're afraid, very afraid.

[autorank]

12. haha...

I come into contact with a fair number of JeffK's in my work. They're a trip. It's kind of like "Children of the Damned" with a great sense of humor and insight galore. You and the mister would have either tamed him enough to make it fun or put him 'on the net' to earn his keep!

[Heidi]

13. My sister-in-law's cat

is JeffK with fur. She has made her contribution to society.



:rofl:

[autorank]

14. One of the best DU cat pics ever! haha Like the collar.

I've got a couple that are nuts myself. Supposedly, pets lead to a longer life; well it's certainly funnier.

[Heidi]

15. The cat in that photo . . .

is names Barley, and he's is my cat's brother. What you see in the photo is what I see every morning at my patio window. Barley is the dorkiest cat who ever lived . . . He always has this expression like, "Hey, whatta you guys doin' in there?"

[autorank]

16. That's about right. I've got a 13 year old diabetic cat. Gets shots

every day and is doing great. We keep the food on a counter so the dogs don't wipe it out. About five or six times a day, I walk by this spot the the cat (who used to be able to jump six feet from a standing start) meows at me very sharply. This is my signal to lift her up and place her in front of the food. My wife (who gives her the shots dutifully) and daughter walk by all the time and not a peep. It's hilarious because I generally gripe after the 3-4th time and the cat just meows more until I comply. I'd call Fufi my cat wife but my wife is so much less demanding.

[Zuni]

17. they certainly make it more weird

cats :eyes:

[GiovanniC]

4. Excerpt

Poor Chris Lewis harbors some sort of rage at me because the only phone number he can find is that of my fathers, and every time he calls my father, who I haven't lived with in about 10 years, he fails to reach me.

My dad actually called me last night to say, "Some crazy guy phoned the house here. He called me a 'candy ass' and then hung up."

I replied to him, "Oh yeah, that's this guy representing the Ultimate Warrior. He pretty much has an airtight legal case against us, which is why he's spending his Sunday night calling you, my father."

My dad doesn't understand the Internet as well as I do.

[elehhhhna]

5. LINK, here:

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=2790

Dear Chris Lewis, Director of Internet Detective Skills,

I have noticed your awesome legal strategy has shifted from "threatening to sue for fictional claims" to "insulting my physique and commenting upon my rosy-red cheeks." This is a very clever move on your part, as many legal issues have been resolved this way. Did you know that's how the FBI captured Al Capone? It's true; they sent him a letter talking about his "rosy-red cheeks" and then berated his arm size! Capone had no choice but to storm into FBI offices, at which point he was captured and thrown into jail. I don't remember what for, I think he molested kids with the Pope or something.

I am LMAO.

[Nevernose]

8. The guy writes WELL

I've often lamented the fact that I have the authorial talent of a participant in a Sciavo family reunion, but this, from the front page, is really clever writing:

This fact-filled leap into the deceptively complex world of alien invasion drags a series of interesting questions to the surface. For example, why are aliens attempting to take over "the Earth's Arctic regions?" I've seen plenty of IMAX movies about the Earth's Arctic regions such as "The Earth's Arctic Regions" and the sequel, "The Earth's Arctic Regions 2: Bloodlust," so I like to believe I'm an expert when it comes to the subject of watching movies. Unfortunately, I cannot recall a single instance of aliens wanting to conquer our Arctic reasons, and I cannot even fathom a guess as to what motivation would stir such a desire. Do inter-dimensional spaceships run on ice? If so, should I grab my shotgun and camp outside my freezer for the next week? I guess I'd have to blackmail my wife into guarding the freezer, as I'm currently armed and camping outside the sink because I heard the Chupacabra enters houses through the drain, and I can't let him back in again because my insurance liability rates will skyrocket.

[proud2BlibKansan]

9. Yes that is hilarious

And if that guy actually files a lawsuit, I want a seat in the courtroom.