If I were Tom Cruise's publicist, I would hook him up.... First off,

[henslee]

I would tell him to just ease up on shit. No more proclaiming love, no more dancing, no teeth whitening, no catfights with brooke shields, no more hen parties with oprah. No more talking about religon unless its to get in some girls pants. And since he can't erase hs recent embarassing antics, I would tell him to act even nuttier, to start a nasty feud with Oprah and call her a bitch on tv and and to start calling his old wife the C word. He can start blaming his entire breakdown on Nicole -- we all know the American public would accept that his weirdo behavior was due to getting screwed over by a gorgeious nutty, greedy, actress woman from another country. Finally, shoot some tequilla and go on Howard Stern for let it all hang out interview.

[flvegan]

1. I'd pal him up with Christian Slater and Charlie Sheen. Drag the

bad boy that's buried within to the outside.

It'd only take so many photos of him hanging out with Fred Durst at the Playboy mansion to get that image out there.

[henslee]

2. i think you and i need to start a business NOW.

[flvegan]

3. We'll charge 9% instead of the usual 10, and make a killing!