fuck popularity contests... we should have a popularity OLYMPICS!!!

[sundog]

contestants we be judged in three major categories:

general humor
snark
ability to land a triple salchow

i will not be entering this olympiad, as i will be busy full time judging the men's platform diving :P


**********DU 2005*********

[trof]

1. Is there going to be a Miss/Mr./Ms Congeniality?

I very good at that.

[sundog]

2. absolutely... it's all in the planning phase

:P

[trof]

8. Great! I've got a lock on MC.

[sundog]

18. who should we get to light the torch?

[eyepaddle]

20. Okay, now you see,

that statement is just begging for a wise-ass response. However, I think I'll let a fellow Duer step up to the plate for that! :P

[sundog]

23. i'm waiting...

:boring:

[eyepaddle]

29. Oh, now that's a total shot,

We can make a choice, and get all GD and have a flame war light the torch. Or we could.....well, I bet you can guess, but since I have never met any gay DUers I'm not sure who'd be the best choice! :P

You know, we could have that be a whole pre-olympic event!

:boring: indeed. Harumph. :(

[sundog]

38. bwhahaha... light the torch from gd!

:rofl:

:P

[FuzzySlippers]

3. I got the triple salchow part down.

:P

[sundog]

6. directly followed by a triple axle WHILST posting

[Jara sang]

4. Can archery be one of the events?

I'm a damn fine bowman.

[sundog]

5. archery???

:eyes:

what does archery have to do with the lounge?

you dork :P

[eyepaddle]

7. Do I dare ask

"What's a triple salchow?" :dunce:

[trof]

9. You just had to be there. Read on...

Figure skating jumps are not difficult to understand. Any fan with a quick eye, who knows forwards from backwards left from right can learn to identify common jumps. The Salchow is named after skating pioneer Ulrich Salchow. This is why the word is always capitalized. The Salchow is a very easy jump to identify. Like all other figure skating jumps, the Salchow has three parts: take-off, rotation and landing.

For most skaters, the Salchow is considered to be of intermediate difficulty: very few skaters identify the Salchow as their favorite jump. And certain high profile skaters say that the Salchow is their least favorite jump, among those are Todd Eldredge and Kristi Yamagucci. The Salchow is often seen in pairs skating as a throw jump, where the man throws his partner into the air creating more lift.

In singles, the Salchow is often performed as a solo jump rather than part of a series or combination. A combination is when several, usually two, jumps are performed one after another with no steps or turns between them. When seen in a combination, the Salchow is almost always the first jump. Typical combinations are triple Salchow-triple toeloop or triple Salchow-triple loop. It is possible to perform the Salchow as the third jump in a three jump combination by executing triple toeloop-half loop-triple Salchow. This is not common in elite competition, but it is seen. The last skater to perform it regularly was Tara Lipinski, the 1998 Ladies Olympic champion.

The Salchow looks somewhat like the flip because they take off on the same edge. The flip has a toe assist which makes it slightly easier for some and slightly more difficult for others. This is a matter of personal preference to the individual skater. Some skaters prefer the “edge” jumps, those which do not use a toe assist. Other skaters prefer the “toe” jumps, which use the toe pick to assist. Michelle Kwan is a prominent “toe” jumper. Tara Lipinski is considered to be somewhat of an “edge” jumper.

For a counter-clockwise jumper, the Salchow takes off on the left foot. There is no toe assist, which is one of the things which makes the Salchow easy to identify. The jump rotates in the counter-clockwise direction, an even number of times, and lands on the right foot. For a clockwise jumper, the Salchow takes off on the right foot, rotates clockwise and lands on the left foot. In the Salchow, the skater is taking off from a back inside edge. There is a firm “hook” on the edge just before a Salchow leaves the ice which looks a great deal like a capital J.

There are several acceptable techniques for holding the free foot (the one the skater is not standing on) during the take off. Some skaters have a way of bending the ankle sideways which, though very ugly, is not a deduction. Russian ladies often seem to have this technique. Other skaters leave the foot on the ice like a canoe’s outrigger. This outrigger method is not technically a deduction, but it is frowned upon by good judges. American Timothy Goebel is noted for using an outrigger technique.

The Salchow rotates an even number of times: once for a single, twice for a double, three times for a triple and four times for a quadruple or "quad." The quad Salchow was first performed in Junior level competition (rather than in Senior level) by the, then seventeen year old, Goebel. There was some dispute about whether the jump was legal because of Goebel’s use of the left foot as an outrigger. He was confirmed as the first man to land a quad Salchow and the first American to land a quad in competition after the judges reviewed the attempted jump on tape.

Though using the free foot as an outrigger is not considered an error, there is one common deduction for the Salchow. Unlike the flip where the toe assist normally keeps the jump from being “cheated” the Salchow can easily have some of the rotation take place on the ice. It is acceptable, and good technique to have a tiny bit of rotation take place on the ice. As noted above, the J curve on the edge must be firm, but if the jump rotates more than about one quarter of a rotation before it leaves the ice, it is called “cheating” the jump and is a deduction.

For both clockwise and counterclockwise skaters, the Salchow lands on a back outside edge; however, just landing the jump is not an indication of quality. A good quality jump has good speed going and coming out. The skater is supposed to flow out of the jump smoothly, with no wobbling, no touching the ice with her hands and no hopping. Moreover, the skater should have a strong, upright carriage, a gracefully held leg and turned out toes. This is the essence of skating.

[sundog]

10. it's one of those jumpy twisty things iceskaters do & 9/10 times they fall

and everyone in the audience gasps or cries or secretly says 'yes' under their breath...

then the skater will continue to skate while holding back the tears & all that drama :P

[eyepaddle]

11. Ah ha,

notice the juxtaposition of these two answers!

Both are appreciated! :D

On edit: I bet you can guess what kind of sport I want there to be!

[sundog]

13. haha

two sides of the coin... i always go for brevity...

and i assume you want sort of questionable paddling sport :bad:

for shame! :P

[eyepaddle]

14. Just out of curiousity, what do you think when you see my username?

If there is anybody who knows the pulse of the lounge it's Sundog. What, with his legion of "acolytes"

(Of course that's before you read my updated sig line!) :P

[sundog]

17. you're trying to drag me down to the gutter!

and i already own waterfront property there :P

[eyepaddle]

19. LOL!

well that answers the question then!

I never suspected it might have "saucy" undertones!
:rofl:

Someday if you are all nice I'll tell my "gardening" story--it's not racy, but it's a Three's Company-like misunderstanding where people laughed behind my back for MONTHS!

[SOteric]

12. That's scandalous!

That you would even consider a Winter Olympics sport in June fer Cripes Sakes! :wow:

[sundog]

15. who said anything about winter??

triple salchow on the slip & slide

[SOteric]

16. Ah. That's different then.

Nevermind. :hi:

[Zuni]

21. what about "general studliness"

actually that wouldn't be good as I would be a shoe-in. :o

I am pretty good at snarkiness too, so watch out DU

[sundog]

25. pic?

:evilgrin:

[Zuni]

58. stop trying to turn me gay sundog

I am on to you and your "homosexual agenda" :P

[sundog]

63. haha... dammit! i need some stronger voodoo!

:rofl:

[Zuni]

72. Sundog got his Mojo workin

and it just won't work on me...:evilfrown:

In the future, try getting your mojo hands from someplace other than Walmart. :eyes:

I suggest your local Gypsy Woman :bounce:

:hi:

[sundog]

74. look! i consulted a high voodoo priest in the swamps dammit!

these things take time, however...

taunt me all you want...

WARNING!

he who laughs last...

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

22. I have one thing to say.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

:rofl:

[sundog]

24. you win for most obnoxious post TO FUCK UP MY SCREEN!!!

:nuke:

[RevolutionaryActs]

26. I got a little carried away

So sue me! :P

[sundog]

27. i DIVORCE you! i DIVORCE you! i DIVORCE you!

now what contest are you entering?

[RevolutionaryActs]

30. But.....

You can't divorce me! What about the children? :o

[sundog]

33. JimmyJazz ran away cause of all the pressure you were putting on her

all i have are her shoes to remind me :cry:

[RevolutionaryActs]

34. Must.... not..... laugh....

oh fuck it! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[sundog]

35. you laugh now...

i laugh now AND later :rofl:

[RevolutionaryActs]

37. Now and later

:9

[sundog]

39. smarties

[RevolutionaryActs]

40. laffy taffy

[sundog]

41. jolly rancher

http://www.cadysonline.com/images/productImages/$1_Jolly_Rancher.jpg

[RevolutionaryActs]

44. bottle caps

Edit: I'm getting hungry. x(

[sundog]

45. mary janes

[RevolutionaryActs]

46. Damn it.

Now my mom wants to know why I'm laughing hysterically. :rofl:

[sundog]

47. trying to get this thread flaming so we can start carrying the torch...

to the grande lounge stadium & ceremony & all that shit

[RevolutionaryActs]

48. Sweet!

I'm more then happy to help.

So tell me, what kind of events will we have? :shrug:

[sundog]

50. i see you have not read a single other post in this thread

:grr:

and i do NOT plan on repeating myself, young lady :P

NOW... who will be first to carry the torch?

[RevolutionaryActs]

52. What?

I'm suppose to actually read what you say? Will shit.

[sundog]

54. you WILL read it... now!!! pop quiz in fiteen minutes!

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

55. Is it multiple choice?

:P

[sundog]

56. no, essay

:evilgrin:

[RevolutionaryActs]

59. Fuck!

Ok um... there was some talk about speedos(where's Kleeb?) and measuring things. :o

[sundog]

62. What was the general consensus regarding olympiads' entrance into the

area?

Well?

[RevolutionaryActs]

65. Hm.

there was something about lighting the touch in GD, but I don't know about the actual entrance into the arena though. :o

[sundog]

66. ticktickticktickticktick

BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

WRONG!

flags! you forgot about the flags already?

oh - i suppose you have some excuse for not being at the board meeting :eyes:

[RevolutionaryActs]

68. Show me

where in this thread it talks about flags? Except for right now. Hmmm where? :P

[sundog]

70. in the part before you lallygagged in here a half an hour late!

:grr:

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

71. I'm not late.

You're early.

[sundog]

73. you're a mess! brush your hair & teeth & tuck your shirt in!

this is official shit!

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

75. Dude..... how do you know what I look like today?

:o

[sundog]

77. psychic... part of the benefits of my new voodoo...

does everything but attract the guys x(

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

79. Whoa,

creepy. :scared:

[sundog]

81. it's NOT creepy...

you are :P

[RevolutionaryActs]

83. Oh, so it's not creepy that you're spying on young girls

using your psychic abilities? :o

[sundog]

84. oh please.. i only received a psychic fashion alert

and i saw a vision of you in my wonton soup

[RevolutionaryActs]

86. BWHAHAHAHAHA!

:rofl:


Really? I'm sorry you had to see that. :o

[JimmyJazz]

69. I. Hate. You.

Now bite me, sundog :P

[sundog]

76. bwhahahahahaaaaa

:rofl:

i knew i'd get you out of your hiding :rofl:

[bridgit]

28. i'm gon'na support this notion...

:rofl: but you need a name dropping digicam event Big Time, holmes :thumbsup:

[sundog]

31. BRIDGIT!

just thought i'd drop your name :P

i see it in lights!

fame is ours!!!!!!!! :bounce:

[bridgit]

60. fame is ours dammit!!!

we stole it fair & square :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[sundog]

61. BRIDGIT! BRIDGIT!

see!

stick with me sweetheart!

they won't know what him them! :P

[bridgit]

64. k, you got it, just don't think less of me if you wake up...

and find me on all 4's :blush:

[sundog]

67. bwhahaha

:rofl:

:spank:

[xmas74]

32. May I be your assistant?

I would like to be the person who makes sure that all of the divers wear the correct size of Speedos.
You really have to do alot of touching and feeling to make sure that all is snug but not too snug.

[sundog]

36. yes... you can stand by my side, take notes, and whisper things in my ear

[xmas74]

42. Can I also bring a ruler?

We must measure all of the contestants!

[sundog]

43. hahahaha

:rofl:


we can take turns :evilgrin:

[xmas74]

49. We must!

They must be qualified to compete in our events.

[sundog]

51. i'm in agree with you! what you said!

:bounce:

[xmas74]

53. I knew you would be.

We must wear our slut monikers well and do them justice.

[sundog]

57. i'm getting it tattooed on my right shoulder

[xmas74]

78. Really? Cuz I was getting mine tatooed on my ass.

I don't have a tat there yet.

[sundog]

80. on my neck & left nut too

:rofl:

[xmas74]

82. Sexy!

[Redstone]

85. Oh, Christ, you're not going to have DICK BUTTON doing the

announcing, are you?

There's a guy with a unique gift: He can manage to be infinitely boring, AND infinitely infuriating, both at the same time.

Redstone