Soul Mates.

[coloradodem2005]

What does it mean to be soul mates? What does it take? Do both people have to know that they are soul mates for them to be soul mates? This is just a casual question.

[Hugin]

1. It happens...

Soul mates don't always become romantically involved though...

It's just too weird.

[Modem Butterfly]

2. I don't believe in soul mates

I don't believe in souls, for that matter. I think it's a romantic ideal or metaphor, but not really applicable. Besides, the idea that somewhere, out there is your perfect mate means that they may very well be sunning on a beach in Australia or herding sheep in the Ukraine or maybe celebrating their 85th birthday, so how the hell are you supposed to find them?

[Hugin]

3. But, isn't it at all comforting for you to think...

No matter their physical attributes they may exist?

[Modem Butterfly]

10. Not really, no

I think the idea that someone might be just a bit more perfect for you actually puts more stress on your actual relationships. How could your real-life hope to compare with the fantasy?

[Hugin]

12. True... If one is the sort to chase the unattainable.

Some people are never satisfied.

I've never been willing to destroy a sure thing to make
room for a fantasy.

However, I think most of my relationships are perfect already.
So, there's no need to quest for the ideal.

I'm satisfied.

[SarahB]

4. It's hard to say.

Sometimes people find themselves inexplicable linked (sometimes even defying logic and all that fun stuff). I'm not sure if there's any one person for everyone, but perhaps a handful of people we come to know in our lives that mean something beyond just the superficial or transient.

[Bonhomme Richard]

5. What is really weird is.....................

when you have never met them in person and you feel you know that person intimately, and probably never will.
Maybe I'm just a crazy romantic.

[Obamarama]

6. It's hard to explain....something "clicks"

But "something clicking" is an oversimplification.

I think you can have romanitc (partner/husband/wife) soul mates, and those that are involved in your life as platonic friends as well. I have two soul mates...one is my partner of 16 years, and the other is my closest friend (former co-worker) whom I've known for 8 years.

Very early on in the development of both of these relationships, there was a mutual feeling of "it seems like I've known you forever" that did not fade after the inital phase of infatuation and novelty.

The closest I can come to describing it is that for whatever reason people who are soulmates seem to be able to cut through all the external crap and really see and understand the essence of "who" their soul mate is. They often share the same outlooks, idiosynchracies, ideas.

I think what also distinguishes "soul mates" is that even though we know a lot of intimate details about what makes our soul mate "tick" we never use that knowledge to manipulate or take advantage of.

[xmas74]

9. I have one person who fits that.

He and I both admit that we are pieces of each other. We've even been involved w/ each other-at least on a sexual basis many years ago. But we both have admitted that we could never really be together for the rest of our lives-it would never work. We know each other too well and are too much alike.
On that thought-I adore his wife. They met a few years ago and I was even in their wedding. His wife and I immediately connected-just like we were friends forever. The three of us would do anything for each other. We can go years w/o seeing each other and when we do meet up again it's always by accident at a time when one needs the other the most.
Most think that a soul mate is romantic. It's not. It can be like looking in a mirror and seeing everything you like and dislike about yourself all at once.

[xmas74]

7. It isn't necessarily a romantic match.

It's just the person who is the other part of you-sometimes both the good and the bad. It's kind of like you always knew each other even though you didn't. It's really hard to explain.

[StopTheMorans]

8. if you find a picture on an internet dating site, and it makes your heart

jump, that is your soul mate. pretty simple...

[StopTheMorans]

11. this is a kick for the brokenhearted

KICK!

[movie_girl99]

13. i totally believe that there is a person out there for everyone

i met my husband totally by chance in a movie chat room. Not a romance or looking for love but a movie chat room. I love movies of all types and i love to talk about them. He lived in England and happen to be in the same room time after time. We began corresponding by e-mail and then by phone and 7 months later we met. I went there twice and then he came here on a 90 day visitor visa. Long story short, we obtained an immigration attorney and he came to live and we married one year after we met in that movie chat room. He is my husband, my partner, my best friend and the only person other than my kids that I couldn't live without. We have been married almost 6 years and i still get butterflies when he calls and tells me he's on his way home from work. We spend so much time together and enjoy so many of the same things. He's politically on the same level that i am, we LOVE movies ( go 2-3 times a week) he's the most open minded, supportive person I know and i truly believe we are supposed to be together.

This is my second marriage. The first one was for 13 years married and 18 years together total. never in that 13 years of marriage did I ever have any of the same feelings that I have had for my current husband.

[Modem Butterfly]

14. Love's more wonderful the second time around

[arwalden]

16. Or The Third...

My third marriage is more successful than my first two combined.

-- Allen

[Modem Butterfly]

17. Love's more wonderful, the third time around

[enigmatic]

15. My wife is my soulmate

We found each other in our 30's...

She's my other-half; together we make a whole "being". We're best friends, we know what each other is thinking most times, and coming from a confirmed Loner, I can't imagine living without her.

I know there are those who believe the whole "soulmate" thing is horseshit; they have zero bearing on our lives. Let them think that way; I don't care..

[InvisibleTouch]

18. They exist.

It's a recognition of the other person at first sight, completely independent of any other condition or circumstance. A delighted sense of "I've been waiting for you - what took you so long?" It happened to me many years ago. (The association ended badly, through no fault of either of us, but it did change my outlook on romantic relationships forever after.) I don't know whether I believe in a soul or not, but experiences like that do make you wonder if there isn't some truth to having shared previous lifetimes together, to recognize each other again in the current age.

Yes, both people have to know, and feel the recognition - otherwise it's just one person deluding themselves in the throes of infatuation.

[Patiod]

19. CBS Radio Mystery Theater

Seriously.

My S.O. and I each used to lie in our beds as kids with our transistor radios, and listen to CBS Radio Mystery Theater -- creaky doors and E.G. Marshall.

Don't know if it makes us soul mates, but we cherish the thought that years before we met, we were sharing that experience.

[skygazer]

20. It means you understand each other on an instinctive level

The one person in my life who I consider my soul mate is NOT my hubby, who I love and adore and want to be with for the rest of my life. My soul mate is my best friend. On the first occasion that I met him, in the company of a couple of people he'd known all his life, there was an instant connection between the two of us - not romantic, but electric. It was as if we were the only two people in the room and we were almost talking in code - neither of us needed to fully articulate what we meant because the other knew exactly what it was without the words.

On subsequent meetings, it was the same and has been for the last 12 years. He is the person to whom I can tell anything and know he will understand fully and I am that for him as well. Even the most complex and irrational fear or concern is crystal clear to him and it is incredibly comforting to know I have that.

We've never considered a romantic relationship because we really, really need each other as friends (not that you can't be friends within a romance but because we both have only one real friend - each other - to bounce off concerns about our romances with. If we were together, who would our sounding board be?).