Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes.

[Blue-Jay]

That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes.

-Jack Handey

[MissMillie]

1. Wise words, for sure!

:yourock:

[redqueen]

2. If trees could scream would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?

Maybe if they screamed all the time for no good reason. - Jack Handey

[Misunderestimator]

3. Love it!

[nytemare]

4. Neanderthal kids

I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.~Jack Handey


Loved the Deep Thoughts!!!

:)

[dolo amber]

5. I can picture in my mind a world without war,

a world without hate. And I can picture attacking that world, because they'd never expect it. --JH

:D

[SarahB]

6. That's an Elvis song.

Walk A Mile In My Shoes

If I could be you, if you could be me
For just one hour, if we could find a way
To get inside each other's mind
If you could see you through my eyes
Instead your own ego I believe you'd be
I believe you'd be surprised to see
That you've been blind
Walk a mile in my shoes
just walk a mile in my shoes
Before you abuse, criticize and accuse
Then walk a mile in my shoes
Now if we spend the day
Throwin' stones at one another
'Cause I don't think, 'cause I don't think
Or wear my hair the same way you do
Well, I may be common people
But I'm your brother
And when you strike out
You're tryin' to hurt me
It's hurtin' you, Lord how mercy
Now there are people on reservations
And out in the ghetto
And brother there, but, for the grace of God
Go you and I,
If I only had wings of a little angel
Don't you know, I'd fly
To the top of a mountain
And then I'd cry, cry, cry


Someone's gotta hold down the Elvis fort around here anyway. :P

[Blue-Jay]

7. Please keep Elvis out of the Jack Handey thread.

I'm not gonna warn you again.

:P

[johnnie]

9. I'm doin my best

Forrest has disappeared again..lol.

[SarahB]

12. He has lousy internet access.

I hear from him from time to time though. He's doing well (well, better anyway). :)

[johnnie]

13. Oh good

I haven't talked to him in a few weeks. If you see him, tell him I said "hello".

[SarahB]

15. Will do.

:hi:

[WeRQ4U]

8. If you ever fall from the Sears Tower...

Just go limp, and maybe someone will try to catch you, because hey, free dummy.

[ghostsofgiants]

10. I can still recall old Mister Barnslow getting out every morning...

...and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to the old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he'd yell out, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy. But then we had some growing up to do.

[Debbi801]

11. It takes a big man to cry...

But it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
- Jack Handley

[ghostsofgiants]

14. If I lived back in the wild west days...

...instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like ‘Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!’ and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, ‘That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice.’ Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink.