The Ribbon Collector

[jmowreader]

The other day I got a load of concrete brought to me by an independent trucker. (Most of my concrete comes up from Charlotte on the concrete company's own trucks, so this was a bit out of the ordinary.)

The truck was a Freightliner with a big sleeper, and it was just plastered with ribbon magnets. You name the cause and it was on there. Naturally, I had to ask the guy if he really "supported" all of those causes.

"Ah HELL no!"

Turns out he's a big fan of kitsch, and ribbon magnets are the kitschiest things right now. So when he sees a new magnet he doesn't have one of already, he buys one and sticks it somewhere on his truck. He also had a line of bobbleheads on the dashboard.

The other thing I saw that I thought was kinda funny was this one truck that came in carrying fertilizer. It was another Freightliner with a Caterpillar engine in it. I know he had a Caterpillar engine because both of his doors were decorated with a painting of a cat dressed up like a truck driver complete with bloodshot eyes, gimme cap and gearshift. The hat said "Cat Power!" The door had "Cat Power!" painted in huge letters. The driver's own hat said Cat Power. The driver's tattoo said Cat Power. As did his shirt. So I hadda ask:

"Whatcha got, a Detroit Series 60 in this thing?"
'Why'd you ask that?'
"Cause you spent so much money telling the world you're runnin' Cat power, I figured you went broke before you got the engine." Turns out his wife bought him all the Cat Power stuff to celebrate him getting the truck. And yes, he's got a Cat C-12 in there. He even showed it to me. But he did like the Series 60 joke.

[roguevalley]

1. cute. truckers can be seriously funny and quirky. my dad was.