I did two very bad things last night.

[CubsFan1982]

I bought beer at Wal-Mart, and, indirectly related, I ran over a raccoon on my way home from a party.

This is where you make the moral judgment whether I'm a truly horrible person or not. :P

[LiberalEsto]

Go back to WalMart

and buy a replacement raccoon
:evilgrin:

[patrice]

1. I ran over a turtle once. I'm not bad.

[MichiganVote]

2. Your penance is to stand around in the toy dept./ Walmart for an hour

and make a donation to the local humane society. Enjoy the beer.

edit. spelling

[acmavm]

3. Accidents happen, but I bet the racoon wasn't too please with you

right towards the end.

It's the Wal Mart thing that really gets me. I've never been in one in my life. Never will be either. You're grounded for a month.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

4. The racoon's not so bad, although

you will have to go back and clean it up as soon as you read this.

As for the beer at WalMart, well, no, that's just not forgivable.

You're doomed.

Like the racoon.

[RebelOne]

5. I can forgive you for buying beer at Wal-Mart,

but not for running over the raccoon. Did you stop and give him a decent burial?

[CubsFan1982]

13. I called animal control.

It WAS 4am in the middle of nowhere, though.

[Old_Fart]

6. Years ago,

I ran over a right winger that was wearing a raccoon cap in the parking lot of a Walmart and I didn't look back :patriot:

[Maestro]

7. I bought wine today that * drank in Crawford and in DC.

It's hard being an activist.

[sundog]

8. bait & switch!

and i thought you were gonna post something naughty :P

well, i guess shopping at walmart would be considered naughty... and running over the raccoon was your karma for shopping there

[tjwmason]

9. We know what you were thinking of.

:P

[CubsFan1982]

11. You know we can't have sex threads anymore.

:P

[caty]

10. You shopped at Walmart??!!

How could youuu??? That is something I just can't forgive.

[leftofthedial]

12. the beer at Wal Mart is 50 demerits

the raccoon is 25 points

So, you're at -25.

Not that bad. Lighten up on yourself. Slam one of the beers in under 5 seconds and you're back in plus territory!

[CubsFan1982]

14. 5 seconds? That's for amateurs.

Try 2! :D

[name not needed]

15. That better have been some good fuckin' beer.

[CubsFan1982]

16. Oh, it was.

Have you ever had Harp? Good Lord, if they serve beer in heaven, I think it's that.

[Reverend_Smitty]

19. They sell beer at Wal-Mart???

even good imported beer? but still you shopped at Wal-Mart so :spank:

[CubsFan1982]

26. I think it was one of those "classy" Wal-Marts.

If there are such things. I was quite surprised they had non-American beer instead of that horse piss that comes out of St. Louis and Denver.

[obxhead]

44. bought

liqueur in a AZ walmart 3 years back - freaked me out.

[Not_Giving_Up]

17. For your actions, your sentence is

thirty lashes with a wet noodle. If you had stayed away from Wal-Mart, that raccoon would still be alive.

[dajoki]

18. too bad for racoon, however

thank God it wasn't a person:hangover:

[I Have A Dream]

20. Did you hit the raccoon because of the beer? n/t

[CubsFan1982]

25. No, I did not.

That would necessitate me driving under the influence. I always stop drinking at least two hours before I plan on leaving, and drink nothing but water between then and when I do leave. So I was pretty much sober.

[I Have A Dream]

32. Then I think that you have no bad karma.

We can only do the best that we can with what we have at the time.

In reference to Wal*Mart, it's your choice to make. My mother has a Wal*Mart right next to her, and she doesn't drive. Therefore, I was really rooting for it to come into her town because it would make life much easier for her. (Additionally, almost all of the mom & pop stores had already closed down in her town, so it wasn't going to put them out of business.) I know that this was selfish on my part, but I have to be honest -- I really did want them to come to her town.

I never go to Wal*Mart for any of my own shopping, but I go there with her.

Enjoy your beer!

[musette_sf]

21. Three Our Fathers

Five Hail Marys, and go piss on a photo of Sam Walton.

go in peace, my child.

[Wapsie B]

22. If you hit a raccoon

it could've very well been rabid. Therefore you saved a lot of other animals and maybe a child from being bitten.

[warrens]

23. One time my mom was driving to work

She hadn't bought beer at Wal-Mart and she swerved to avoid a raccoon, her car flipped over, the raccoon died anyway, the car was totalled and she spent three weeks in the hospital.

All things considered, you did good.

[madinmaryland]

24. Drink the beer and then return it to Wal-mart.

:evilgrin:

[Seabiscuit]

34. ... in liquid form. You can toss the cans out anywhere. But the beer

itself must be returned to Wal-Mart.

[Floogeldy]

27. Stupid fucking racoon!

Could have messed up your tire alignment, or sumpin'.

B-)

[NMMNG]

28. I forgive you

You had a beer craving that had to be answered, and the racoon was an honest accident. Just don't let it happen again.

Plus I get a hysterical laugh every time I see the pic in your sig line. :rofl:

[CubsFan1982]

37. Well, here it is again. nt

[LordshipLadyship]

29. repent, for it is the raccoon rapture.

[Robeson]

30. Yes, on both counts. Buying at Walmart is inexcusible.....

...and they're are probably some raccoon family members who are still anxiously waiting to see if Mom/Dad will ever make it home....

But the raccoon may have been unavoidable, so I'll cut you some slack on that. But the trip to Walmart.....never....

Sorry, I'll not excuse your guilt....

[CubsFan1982]

35. If it counts for anything...

It looked like one of those orphaned raccoons who had no family. :D

[dbt]

31. It's WAY worse than just being a Horrible Person.

You MIGHT be a redneck now!

:evilgrin:

[CubsFan1982]

36. You have besmirched my good name!

We meet at dawn! Pistols at ten paces! Good day, sir!

[GOPBasher]

33. Well, two negatives cancel and give you a positive, right?

:shrug:

[CubsFan1982]

38. That's what I learned in school.

So it must be true!

[KitchenWitch]

39. Shame on you cubbie!

The raccoon was Karma for buying beer at Walmart

[UrbScotty]

40. The photo (and caption) in your sig line makes up for it.

:D

[CubsFan1982]

43. I can't take too much credit for it.

I got it in an e-mail from a friend. I've noticed there's a DUer whose name I forget who has a slightly different version, too. :D

[rexcat]

41. You are going to burn in hell unless...

you send me a case of my favorite beer, then all will be good with the world.

[CubsFan1982]

42. What do you like?

I'll have the dead raccoon deliver it personally! :D

[rexcat]

46. Beer with road kill...

YUM!!!!! Make mine a Killian with the raccoon medium rare.

:beer:

[JVS]

45. Running over a raccoon is not wrong. Shit happens.

[Mojambo]

47. Phew!

I thought you were going to say you accidentally killed a hooker in Vegas and then cut up her body and buried it in the desert.

Walmart beer and a Raccoon? You'll be fine.

[CubsFan1982]

48. LOL

If only my life were that exciting. :P