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Liberal Teacher Burns Flag In Front Of Students
By RepublicanPress.com Staff
Jun 15, 2005, 20:40

A liberal school teacher at a high school somewhere in New York burned an American flag in front of his students. The teacher made his students hold hands and sing peace songs as he torched Old Glory.

"I didn't want to be there, but he - the teacher - told me that I would fail his class if I didn't attend." said one student who wished to remain nameless for this story.

"After he burned the flag he made us have sex with each other." stated another un-named student.

"I turned queer afterwards." another unidentified student was overheard to say.

The school where this flag burning took place cannot be mentioned in this article, nor can the teacher be identified. "We can not reveal any names, for fear that the liberal ACLU will sue us and try to win the legal lottery. Former President Jimmy Carter will have us killed." said a spokesperson for Jerry Falwell. The spokesman went on to say,"But we do have video of this awful event happening, and we also have tape of former President Bill Clinton being there. This film shows Clinton having sex with the entire female staff at this school." the spokesperson went on to say as he waved a VHS tape in the air. The spokesperson would not, however, let us or anyone else view the VHS tape. "Just another example of liberal bias in our public schools." were the reported words of Pat Robertson, the founder of The 700 Club.


© Copyright 2004 by RepublicanPress.com

[DS1]

1. This is some of the best parody ever!

From Kathleen Kunlty - GOP Media Dive

Deep Drilling in ANWR

(snip)


I stayed for 22 days with these rugged, horny renegade drillers and then I was off to club baby seals with some devout club toting conservatives. It was there that I began to feel ill. I had clubbed my first baby seal and I was hoping to kill a whale or possibly some endangered species, but sharp pains rocked my stomach and I was sick each morning from then on.

I was taken to see an Eskimo Shaman for the pain I was feeling. I was nervous as I entered into his igloo and noticed that he was an aged man. Yes, he was indeed old, with shaky hands, and I was in pain as I stripped naked and placed my feet into the stirrups. Doctor Frankie Seal Fur was his name. I waited for him to do his thing upon me. I felt so cold and alone. As his trembling hands entered me, “down there," I knew something was amiss. “OOOPS....” Doctor Frankie Seal Fur as he examined me with a rusty old coat hanger.

“Did you get it?” I asked in an anxious voice.

He nodded his Eskimo head in the affirmative and I knew that once more I had been cheated out of motherhood by a liberal activist doctor. Once again, the sanctity of life had been forsaken. After I recovered from Doctor Frankie Seal Fur’s botched cooter exam, I sat out again to examine the liberal lies. I could see nothing but snow covered land just aching to be drilled. "This land wants to be drilled, and drilled deep and hard.....I know how this land feels.” I said to myself and then I got back into my private jet for my long journey home.


:applause:

[republicanpress]

2. Thanks!

Thanks so much!

We try. We're just hoping to spread the word about our site.

[Redstone]

3. You're doing great.

Very, very funny stuff.

Redstone

[NMMNG]

4. OMG

When I looked at the link and your screen name I thought you were a troll. Then I read the article and checked out the site and I can't stop laughing. It's hysterical! I especially love this article:

Lesbianism: A Problem That Must Be Licked
By RepublicanPress.com Staff
Jun 15, 2005, 10:14

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"High school girls can't even go to the restroom, without fear of being stalked by lesibians!" Oklahoma U.S. senator Tom Colburn recently stated. He then went on to say that this was just another example of liberalism in action. It is also an example of how our public schools are being controled by the Teacher's Union.

"I went to the restroom, and I was turned lesibian by 5 lesbians." stated one Oklahoma high school teenager. She chose not to reveal her name for this article for fear that the bull dykes would abuse her. She went on to
state,"Sure, I'm afraid to go straight. I'm afraid to name names, because the ACLU and the Teachers' Union will sue me and my family."

This online magazine went to most Oklahoma high schools and found that most teenage girls have either turned lesbian, or they have thought about it. "I can't stop now!" we were told by another Oklahoma teenage girl, as she sobbed and cried remembering a time gone by when she liked boys.

"I think that is why Oklahoma is known as tornado alley; for it is the wrath of God against lesbians." said Pat Robertson of the 700 Club. Pat Robertson went on to say,"If 10,000 people will each donate 10,000 dollars
to the 700 Club, I will feed some Indians on the reservations in Oklahoma." Pat did not specify what this had to do with lesbians in Oklahoma.

Most of the Oklahoma teenage girls we spoke to were adamant in their lesbianism. We spoke to several that even threaten to turn noted conservative media whore Ann Colter lesbian.

Lesbianism: A Problem That Must Be Licked
By RepublicanPress.com Staff
Jun 15, 2005, 10:14

Email this article
Printer friendly page

"High school girls can't even go to the restroom, without fear of being stalked by lesibians!" Oklahoma U.S. senator Tom Colburn recently stated. He then went on to say that this was just another example of liberalism in action. It is also an example of how our public schools are being controled by the Teacher's Union.

"I went to the restroom, and I was turned lesibian by 5 lesbians." stated one Oklahoma high school teenager. She chose not to reveal her name for this article for fear that the bull dykes would abuse her. She went on to
state,"Sure, I'm afraid to go straight. I'm afraid to name names, because the ACLU and the Teachers' Union will sue me and my family."

This online magazine went to most Oklahoma high schools and found that most teenage girls have either turned lesbian, or they have thought about it. "I can't stop now!" we were told by another Oklahoma teenage girl, as she sobbed and cried remembering a time gone by when she liked boys.

"I think that is why Oklahoma is known as tornado alley; for it is the wrath of God against lesbians." said Pat Robertson of the 700 Club. Pat Robertson went on to say,"If 10,000 people will each donate 10,000 dollars
to the 700 Club, I will feed some Indians on the reservations in Oklahoma." Pat did not specify what this had to do with lesbians in Oklahoma.

Most of the Oklahoma teenage girls we spoke to were adamant in their lesbianism. We spoke to several that even threaten to turn noted conservative media whore Ann Colter lesbian.

Lesbianism: A Problem That Must Be Licked
By RepublicanPress.com Staff
Jun 15, 2005, 10:14

Email this article
Printer friendly page

"High school girls can't even go to the restroom, without fear of being stalked by lesibians!" Oklahoma U.S. senator Tom Colburn recently stated. He then went on to say that this was just another example of liberalism in action. It is also an example of how our public schools are being controled by the Teacher's Union.

"I went to the restroom, and I was turned lesibian by 5 lesbians." stated one Oklahoma high school teenager. She chose not to reveal her name for this article for fear that the bull dykes would abuse her. She went on to
state,"Sure, I'm afraid to go straight. I'm afraid to name names, because the ACLU and the Teachers' Union will sue me and my family."

This online magazine went to most Oklahoma high schools and found that most teenage girls have either turned lesbian, or they have thought about it. "I can't stop now!" we were told by another Oklahoma teenage girl, as she sobbed and cried remembering a time gone by when she liked boys.

"I think that is why Oklahoma is known as tornado alley; for it is the wrath of God against lesbians." said Pat Robertson of the 700 Club. Pat Robertson went on to say,"If 10,000 people will each donate 10,000 dollars
to the 700 Club, I will feed some Indians on the reservations in Oklahoma." Pat did not specify what this had to do with lesbians in Oklahoma.

Most of the Oklahoma teenage girls we spoke to were adamant in their lesbianism. We spoke to several that even threaten to turn noted conservative media whore Ann Colter lesbian.

Lesbianism: A Problem That Must Be Licked
By RepublicanPress.com Staff
Jun 15, 2005, 10:14

Email this article
Printer friendly page

"High school girls can't even go to the restroom, without fear of being stalked by lesibians!" Oklahoma U.S. senator Tom Colburn recently stated. He then went on to say that this was just another example of liberalism in action. It is also an example of how our public schools are being controled by the Teacher's Union.

"I went to the restroom, and I was turned lesibian by 5 lesbians." stated one Oklahoma high school teenager. She chose not to reveal her name for this article for fear that the bull dykes would abuse her. She went on to
state,"Sure, I'm afraid to go straight. I'm afraid to name names, because the ACLU and the Teachers' Union will sue me and my family."

This online magazine went to most Oklahoma high schools and found that most teenage girls have either turned lesbian, or they have thought about it. "I can't stop now!" we were told by another Oklahoma teenage girl, as she sobbed and cried remembering a time gone by when she liked boys.

"I think that is why Oklahoma is known as tornado alley; for it is the wrath of God against lesbians." said Pat Robertson of the 700 Club. Pat Robertson went on to say,"If 10,000 people will each donate 10,000 dollars
to the 700 Club, I will feed some Indians on the reservations in Oklahoma." Pat did not specify what this had to do with lesbians in Oklahoma.

Most of the Oklahoma teenage girls we spoke to were adamant in their lesbianism. We spoke to several that even threaten to turn noted conservative media whore Ann Colter lesbian.

http://www.republicanpress.com/artman/publish/article_36.shtml

[NMMNG]

5. Ooops, sorry for the double posting of the article

When I noticed it later I tried to edit but it was too late :blush: