For who else did Father's Day suck?

[Brewman_Jax]

I didn't bother. I'd like to say that I'm adopted (that would explain a few things. :P ) but the birth certificate says otherwise. I'm so tired of him just sitting on his flabby ass thinking that he's the gods gift to family and a legend in his own mind. Looking back, being a family man was something he never really wanted to do. He's retired, so time is not an issue. He never got over getting early retired by IBM in 1992. When if my mother needs something from the supermarket, or most any other routine task, I get the call.

The beginning of the end was when my mother was severely ill from pneumonia most of last summer. Three weeks in ICU, about 4 wks in a regular room, 3 wks in the convolesent/nursing homes and I barely saw any of my brothers (I have 2) or my father. No calls or assistance from any of the slack bastards. If she need anything, the task fell on my shoulders.

The youngest is an artist, and has part-time jobs, so his time and resources are limited. The middle one is married and in IT support, so he's better off. He's got severe issues, mainly that they didn't get divorced years ago.

The last straw was that the artist lost the graphics job he was trying for to internal politics. He and his roommate didn't renew the lease, and he told the middle one that there's no room at home and you'll have to rent him a room, if it should come to that.

The worse part is that he isn't someone I'm proud of. At least he did show me how NOT to be a man. I decided that I had enough. I didn't feel like lying anymore, so I didn't bother. I know that some will understand, some will not. This is the abridged version; but, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

edit for spelling and content

[AngryAmish]

1. Mine did too

Dad died last December. I miss him desperately.

[Midlodemocrat]

2. Mine did as well. First Father's Day without my dad.

He passed in August. On the brighter side, my FIL has moved in with us, so it was a nice day for him and my husband, as well as the kids. But for me, it sucked royally.

[tnlefty]

5. My empathies. My Dad died last August and I just tried to stay

really busy and to have fun with my kids and their Dad.

[Brewman_Jax]

7. My condolences

I'm sorry to hear. :cry:

[Beware the Beast Man]

3. Haven't had a reason to celebrate in 25 years.

And if I do recall, that was always the weekend of his big golf trip when he was around. I figure, in a couple of years, I will have a reason to celebrate. :)

[Brewman_Jax]

9. In 25 years?

is your father still alive, or was that when he passed? :(

[Beware the Beast Man]

12. He's still alive.

Only dead in the "beat" sense.

[Brewman_Jax]

13. I do know the feeling

that's the main reason mom didn't divorce him. She figured that would happen, I think that she was right. My brother doesn't seem to comprehend that. :shrug:

[Trigger Hippie]

4. Mine sucked too

My first Father's Day living away from home. I miss my dad. I called my grandfather to wish him a good day and he forlornly asked when I was coming home. It made me sad. :(

[NewJeffCT]

6. mine kind of sucked

But, that was because my wife was sick in bed all day...

[livetohike]

8. Mine did

My Dad died this past November.

[Brewman_Jax]

10. My condolences

That's very recent. I'm sorry to hear. :cry:

[Felix Mala]

11. Third FD w/o Dad, but first I thought about him and not the long

hard illness that killed him.

[Brewman_Jax]

16. My condolences

:cry:

[barb162]

14. Mine did, FIL is an arrogant jerk

[Jokerman]

15. My father died last month, but I don't grieve.

I know this will sound cold and heartless to most of you but my dad was an asshole. Father's day and his birthday were about the only times in the last ten years that I felt obligated to put up with the self-centered jerk.

My seriously dysfunctional sister always told me that some day he would be gone and I'd wish I had spent more time with him. Boy was she wrong.

Truth is that I'll miss the man about as much as I miss the burst appendix that the doctors removed from my body.

Thanks to therapy I realized years ago that my father was cruel, abusive and emotionally distant. I grieved when I discovered that, in many important ways, I never had a father.

Like you, Lurking_Argyle, I view my father mainly as an example of how not to be a man.

[dubyaD40web]

17. Sorry to hear that Jokerman.

I haven't had a Dad in 10 years. He died of a heart-attack at 55 years old.

Now my father-in-law is a different story. I love that man. He's good as gold.

[Brewman_Jax]

18. I know the feeling

My mom said that he was a nice guy, before they got married. No one knows what happened. :shrug:

[supernova]

19. I grieved some. Dad's been gone for 10 years now

this past January.

Some years it hits harder than others. This year was tough. Dad and I did love each other, but he was very shy and didn't say much. He often let my mother speak for him, even to us children. When I grew up and moved away, he hated talking on the phone so mom would say "Dad says 'Hi' " .

I understand him better (I have many of the same traits) now, so I understand where it came from. But I grew up without that confidence and sense of worth that an active father can give you. I'm still working on that.

:hug: To everyone who grew up with much worse situations than mine.

[Brewman_Jax]

21. Thanks

and my condolences to you. :cry:

[Bunny]

20. On Sunday evening, for a brief second, I had one of those "holy

shit! I forgot to call Dad!" moments. But it lasted for only a second. Dad died in '03 - this was my third Father's Day without him. :cry:

[Brewman_Jax]

22. My condolences

sounds like you miss him. :cry:

[Brewman_Jax]

23. One brother did call

but he didn't do anything 'cause he didn't "want to play favorites" since he did nothing for mom on Mother's Day. :eyes: I don't think the youngest one called, but he's working for out of town 'til the end of this week.

[DemGirl7]

24. My father's day sucked....

but that's because my dad died little over a year ago, I spent the whole morning at his grave with my mom, and don't really like going to the cemetary...because it creeps me out alot

:(

[Brewman_Jax]

30. My condolences

it's difficult when your father has passed away. :(

[BikeWriter]

25. One Son IMed me. I didn't hear from the other...

[BlondieK143]

26. Less like a father and more of a sperm donor.

First of all, you're absolutely wonderful for caring for your mother like you did. You're a true stand-up man and you're nothing like your father.

My dad is one of those people that's a parent when it's convenient for him. He's working on marriage number 3 and he's more involved in her children's lives than in his own blood's. It used to hurt me a lot (and honestly, at times it still does). I used to try my damndest to get his affection, but not these days. I called him on his birthday and on Father's Day, but those are the only two times I've talked to him since Christmas.

[Brewman_Jax]

33. Third marriage

at least your father had the guts to get a divorce. Mine is such a tightwad that he wouldn't get divorce 'cause he'd have to pay support. It was embarrassing wearing old hand-me-downs looking like a single parent family and having to admit that, "yes, my father is alive, parents are married, and I dress like crap." :( :hide:

[tsakshaug]

27. spoke to my kids

Their mother took them out of town to see her father-that's OK he has about 6 months to live. I missed them, but usually do.

spoke to my father

[Brewman_Jax]

31. Congrats!

you seem to be better off than most posters here.

[ScreamingMeemie]

28. Father's Day is always tough for MrG. He found his father dead on Father's

Day 2000. So, every year, I try to take his mind off of it.

I'm sorry you had a bad day. :hug:

[Brewman_Jax]

29. Thanks for the good thought

that's very kind of you. :hug:

[bleedingheart]

32. My father died when I was 10....I miss him to this very day

but I tried to make it a very happy day for my husband..

[Brewman_Jax]

34. That's very good

and my condolences. Sorry that you lost your father at such a young age. :cry: