HELLO AGEN AL U CRAZEY LIE-BRULS!

[CanuckAmok]

WEL HEER IT IS IT IS THE NEW SUMER AND I AM SHURE AL U WEERD PAGIN HEETHINS ARE DANCING AROUND MAYDAY POLES AND WELCOMING THE URTH MOTHER GODIS WHO PROBLY LOOKS LIKE HITLERY BUT WITH 8 ARMS AND A TRUNK AND DARE I SAY IT NO PENES!! LOL!!

BUT NOW IT IS THE GOOD WETHER AT LEEST U AND ME CAN AGREE ON THIS. AND BOY IT IS SHURE HOT HEER THIS YEER. I AM LUCKIE THERE IS NO WATTER LIMITS AT THE NEW TRALER PARK WE MOVED IN TO BEECUS THE KIDS WOOD MELT FROM THE HEET I TELL U WAT! WELL ACSHALLY THERE IS A WATTER LIMIT BUT I DON’T THINK IT HAS COME HEER YET BEECUS THERE IS STIL WATTER POORING OUT OF THE HOSE SO I GESS THERE IS SOME LEFT.

AND THAT IS GOOD BEECUS MISTY SAIS THAT THE LAST THING SHE WANTS IS TO WURK AL DAY AT THE NEW COFEY SHOP AND COME HOME TO A PULE WITH NO WATTER IN IT ESPESHALLY WEN SHE SPENDS A OUR BLOWING IT UP! SO SHE IS IN THERE NOW WITH DERMOTT AND CAITLIN AND BRANDIE AND MISHEL AND 2 KIDS I DIDN’T RECOGNIZE BUT FIGURE ARE ARS. MORE ON MISTY AND THE NEW COFEY SHOP LATTER AND U WONT BEELEEVE WAT I SAY!

AND I AM AT THE LIBERY AND THAT IS WY I HAV TIME TO RITE TO U LIE-BRULS AGEN AND POINT OUT THAT U R STILL RONG AND STOOPID STILL!!!!!! I HAV NEVER SEEN THE LIBERY HEER SO BISY THANKS TO AIR CONDISHINING!

INSTEAD OF DUING MY USHOOAL LONGWINDID SPEEL OF HOW RONG U AL R I HAV DEESIDED TO GO POINT BY POINT SO U CAN SPEND LES TIME ON THE COMPUTER AND MORE TIME SODIMISING MAIL GOATS OR WATEVER U AL DO!!! LOLOLOLOL!!!!

OK

1 GEORGE W BUSH IS THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA AND PROBLY ALWAYS WIL BE AT LEEST IN THE MINDS OF REEL AMERICANS WHO NO WATS WAT. U AL SHOOD REESPECT HIS DESISHONS BEECOS AS I HAVE POINTED OUT BEFORE HE IS GODS TOOL ON EARTH. SO EVEN WEN WAT HE DUS MAKES NO SENCE IT MAKES SENSE TO GOD SO U SHOOD DO IT OR NOT DO IT DEPENDING ON WAT IT IS. SO WILE AL GORE WAS BISY INVENTING THE INTERNETS (LOL!!) GEORGE W BUSH WAS BISY WORKING HIS WAY THROO LOTS AND LOTS OF COMPANYS AND BISNESSIS LERNING HOW TO RUN THE COUNTRY LIKE A CORPRATSHUN. HE WORKED IN LOTS OF PLACES TO GET LOTS OF EXPEREENCE AND HE IS A GOOD MANAGER IT IS OVIOS BEECOS NOT ONLY IS HE IN CHARGE OF THE IRAQ EVERY BODY WHO WORKS RITE UNDER HIM SES THAT THEY HAVE TO WORK WAY HARDER WEN HE IS AROUND! HE IS A GOOD MOTIVATER! PLUS IF U LOOK MOST OF THOS COMPANYS WENT BUST NOT LONG AFTER GEORGE W BUSH LEFT THEM! SO DONT TELL ME WE WOOD BE BETER OFF WITHOUT GEORGE W BUSH! SO IT NOT ONLY IS GEORGE W BUSH THE REEL PRESIDENT BUT NOW IT IS TOO TERMS AS IT! SO THAT MEENS THE SAME SISTEM WITCH ELECTED HIM THE FURST TIME DID IT THE SECOND TIME TO! SO U SEE DEMOCRISY WORKS UNLIKE THE COMY SISTEM U LIKE SO MUCH WERE AL U WOOD GET FOR CHRISTMAS IS FELT AND RENCHES IN YOR RUBER BOOTS OVER THE FIRE. PLUS U WOOD GET ARESTED FOR HAVING CHRISTMAS ANYWAY AND GO TO A GOOLASH AND PROBABLY LOOSE YOUR CRAPPY RENCHES AND FELT ANYWAY I TELL U WAT! BUT U NOW WAT IS INTRESTING ABOUT COMY RUSSIA? THERE IS NO PORNO THERE SO THEY MUST BE DOING SUMTHING RITE EVEN IF IT IS NOT TO IMPRESS GOD IN HEAVEN. MABEY IT IS BEECOS THERE WOMENFOLKS R TO FAT LOL!! THAT WOOD ALSO EXPLANE WHY THERE HAS NEVER BEEN A DAVID LEE ROTH VIDEO WITH GIRLS IN RUSHIN FLAG BEEKEENEES!

2 OK THE GUYS WHO ARE IN GITMO R THERE FOR A REESON AND THAT IS TO BE TORCHERD INTO BEING GOOD FOR AMERICA! NOW AL THAT IS ON THE LIE-BRUL MEEDIA IS HOW THE AMERICAN SOLJERS IN GITMO R BEEING MEEN TO THE PRISONER CAMIL JOCKYS WE COT IN THE IRAQ. BOO HOO TO THAT! AND I SAY THEY DEESERVE THAT FOR 9/11 (RIP BRAVE AMERICAN PATRIOTS—NEVER FORGET!!). IT GOES TO SHOW THAT SOME PEEPUL WILL NOT SHOW RESPECT FOR ARE FREE DEMOCRISY UNTIL ITS TORCHERD OUT OF THEM!

3 STILL CANADA IS UP THERE BEING COMYS AND NO BODY SEEMS TO CARE IN THE GOOD OLD US OF A! THEY COOD WALK RITE IN HERE AND TAKE US AL OUT ESPESHALLY AS ARE ARMED FORCES ARE ALL OVERSEES INVADING AND OCUPIEING CONTREES THAT DON’T BEELEEVE IN DEMOCRISY! EVEN THE SITIZEN SOLJERS ARE IN THE IRAQ AND WHO THE HECK NOS WEN THEY WIL BE HOME WITH MISTER BUSH TELLING THEM TO STAY PUT BEECOS OF AN EMERGINSY. BUT LIKE I SED BEEFOR IF THE GOOD LORD GOD DIDN’T WANT THE PRESIDET TO KEEP SOLJERS IN THE IRAQ FOR TWICE THERE GARANTEED TIME HE WOOD SAY SO WITH A LITNING BOLT OR A TUMER OR SOME THING! SO I GESS NO BODY WILL CARE THAT CANADA CAN INVADE AMERICA UNTIL WE AL HAVE TO DRINK ICE TEE WITH SHUGER IN IT AND EET FRENCH (NOT FREEDOM!!) FRYS WITH MOLDY CHESEE ON THEM. AND THEN IT WILL BE TO LATE TO SAY ANY THING ECEPT BONJOR NABORS HELP YOR SELFS TO THE NUKES AND THE GOLD IN FORT NOCKS!! AND NOW THEY ARE TOKING ABOUT HOW THEY WOOD TAKE IN US MILITRY DESSERTERS CAN U BEELEEVE THAT?! AS IF ANY OF ARE BRAVE PATRIOTIC SOLJERS AND ERMEN WOOD DESSERT! MABEY ALL THE FROOTS KKKLINTOON LET IN BUT HOO NEEDS THEM IN THE MILITRY ANY WAYS?! LET THEM GO TO CANADA WERE EVERY BODY IS HOMO FRENCH AND TIED TO SATAN’S METRICK SISTEM!!! I TELL U WAT!!

4 PARIS HILTON IS NOT FRENCH SO STOP SAYING THAT SHE IS FRENCH U LIERS! SHE IS A GOOD MEET EETING AMEICAN GAL FROM A GOOD FAMILY AND YOR JUST JELIS. TOM CROOS IS ALSO AMERICAN BUT IS IN PARIS RITE NOW MARYING THAT KID WHO IS HAFF HIS AGE. HE IS PROBLY NUTS AND IN THAT SIFI CHURCH SO MABEY THE FRENSH SHOOD KEEP HIM LOL!!! PLUS LOOK AT THAT NOSE AND TEL ME HE ISNT FROM A SMELLY UROPEEN FAMILY ANY WAYS!

5 SLICK BILLY KKKLINTOON IS STILL UP TO HIS OLD TRICKS BUT NOW AT LEEST IT IS AT HOME! U CANT BLAME HIM FOR STEPING OUT A BIT THO WAT WITH BEING MARRIED TO A SHNOWZER. AND HE HAS A BOOK OUT CALED MY LIFE AND U CAN SEE WY HE DIDN’T CALL IT MY WIFE BEECOS NOBODY WOOD BY IT LOL!! WE GET THE SAME KIND AROUND HERE. ALL THEM ARKANSONYANS THINK THEY ARE SO SMART! U NO WAT? PEEPLE FROM ARKENSAW ARENT SO BIG AS THEY THINK AND WE SAVED THERE ASSES IN WORLD WAR 1!

6 SO NOW I HEER THE LIEBRUL MEEDEA IS TRYING TO MAKE AMERICANS FORGET ABOUT THE TERIBEL DAY OF 9/11/01! AND I HAVE TO SAY WAT?! WY DO U LIEBRULS WANT TO FORGET SUTCH AN IMPORTANT DAY I ASK U?! I NO U WANT TO HAVE ORGYS IN THE STREETS AND NOT JUST ON MARTY’S GRAW AND I NO U WANT TO MAKE US AL STOP EETING HAMBURGERS AND ONLY EET NUTS AND BERYS BUT WY DO U WANT TO MAKE US FORGET THAT TERIBEL DAY? THAT IS AL WE NEED IS TO HAVE A NUTHER BUNCH OF CRAZEY TERERISTS FLY PLANES INTO THE SUPER BOWL OR INDEPENDANCE DAY OR SOMETHING EVEN WURST BEECOS WE FORGOT TO LOCK THE HENHOUSE. U LIEBRULS WOOD PROBLY LIKE THAT! BUT IT IS NEVER GOIG TO HAPPEN BEECOS REEL AMERICANS LIKE ME (AND LIKE THE PRESIDENT WHO U NO WILL TOK ABOUT THAT TERRIBEL DAY EVERY DAY HE SAYS ANYTHING AT AL) WILL NEVER FORGET THE TERIBEL EVENTS OF THE DAYS OF SEPTEMBER 9 2001!

8 AND NOW IRAN IS BEEING BAD AGEN AND IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAV TO GET IN THERE AND OPEN MORE WHOOPASS ON THEM LIKE WE DID IN 1980. U DON’T REMEMBER THAT DO U? NO OF CORSE NOT WELL LET ME REFRESH YOR MEMORYS WITH A HISTRY LESSIN. WILE JIMMY CARTER WHO WAS A PENUT FARMER WAS FLYING HELICOPTERS IN TO THE DESERT HARD GOOD OLD RONALD REGAN WAS SEECRETLY KICKING ASS IN IRAN TO GET BACK THE HOSTIJES THEY STOLE! AND THAT IS WHY EVERYTHING IS BEEING RENAMED REGAN THIS AND REGAN THAT AND NOT CARTER THIS AND CARTER THAT. PLUS CRAZEY OLD JIMMY CARTER WAS ATACKT BY A RABIT AND SAW A FLYING SOSSER HOW NUTTY IS THAT I TEL U WAT! ANY WAYS MISTER REGEN SED WE HAD TO GET INTO IRAN BEECOS OF THE FUNDIMENTAL MOOLAHS AND NOW PRESIDENT GEORGE W BUSH AND MISTER CHEENIE ARE ADAM ANT THAT WE NEED TO GET AL OVER THE MIDEL EAST TO GET ALL THE MOOLAHS WE CAN!

9 SO ISRAYIL IS MOVING THE SETLERS OUT OF THERE HOUSES FROM THE STRIPPED GASA AND I SAY WAT AGAIN?! NOW I AM NOT BIG ON JEWS AND HAVE NEVER MET ANY ONE WHO ADMITED TO BEING ONE OF THEM BUT THEY ARE IN THE DESERT BEECOS THEY BEELEEVE IN GOD AND AS FAR AS I CAN TELL IT IS THE SAME GOD AS WE CHRISTIAN AMERICANS BEELEEVE IN AT LEAST FOR THE FIRST FEW CHAPTERS OF THE HOLY BIBLE. I THINK THEY ARE CONFUSED ABOUT THE STUFF LATER ON LIKE JESUS CHRIST A BIT BUT I AM SURE ONCE THEY GET SETLED IN TO THERE NEW RELIGIN THEY WIL SORT IT OUT. AND AS FAR AS I CAN TEL THE ONLY THING THE ARABS WHO ALWAYS INVADE ISRAYIL ONLY BEELEEVE IN BEARDS AND THE CRAZEY HAT! SO IF I HAVE TO CHOSE SIDES IT WILL BE WITH THE ISRAYLEES BEECOS WHO IS GOING TO GET U INTO HEAVEN? A BUNCH OF WISKERS OR GOD? SORRY IF THAT COMES A CROSS AS BLAST FEEMUS. WAT I MEEN IS THAT IF U R WORSHIPING ALLIE OR WWHAT EVER U MITE AS WEL BE WORSHIPING A FLOR LAMP OR A BUKIT OF KFC!

10 AND GET THIS APERENTLY THE NEW POPE IN HOLEY ROAM IS A GERMAN! WAT?! AND NOT ONLY THAT BUT HE WAS IN THE NAZI UTH BUT HE SES IT WAS LIKE THE BOYSCOUTS. THAT TO ME MAKES NO SENSE BEECOS I WAS A BOYSCOUT AND I DO NOT REMBER EVER INVADING POLELAND! AND I WOOD BEECOS IT IS U AL WHO FORGET POLELAND AL THE TIME LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! AT LEEST U CAN ADMIT THE GERMANS NO HOW TO MAKE THE CLOCKS RUN ON THE RIGHT TRACK! SO MABEY NOW THE FRODS IN ROAM WILL GET ON THE BOLL AND STOP WORSHIPING A GIRL AND CASPER THE HOLEY GOST! I NO THEY ARE CHRISTIANS AND SO OUR BROTHERS AND EVERY THING BUT HOLEY COW ARE THEY EVER WEERD WITH THE HATS AND SMOKING IN CHURCH! AND SOME TIMES THEY EVEN HAVE OLD SHRIVELY TOES AND JAWBONES FROM SAINTS IN THE CHURCH!! THAT IS NUTTY WAT IS NEXT A POPE FROM POLELAND?! WHAT A BUNCH OF KOOKS! AND I MEEN THAT WITH RESPECT BEECOS BEEING A CHRISTIAN IS BEEING A CHRISTIAN EVEN WHEN IT GETS A LITTLE WEERD WITH A HANGNALE IN A GOLD BOX OR SOMETHING!

OK NOW AS I PROMISED HEER IS THE UPDATE ON MISTY. ITELL U WAT!! WELL FIRST OF AL THE COFEY PLACE IS GOOD AND GOING VERY GOOD. AND MISTY SEEMS TO LIKE IT A LOT. SHE IS EVEN SPENDING TIME THERE WEN SHE DUSNT HAVE TO BEE THERE AND SHE IS NOT EVEN BEEHIND THE COUNTER! SHE IS SPENDING LOTS OF TIME WITH BROOKE WHO IS FROM THE CHURCH AND WORKED AT THE COFEY PLACE BEEFOR MISTY INHAIRETED IT. BROOKE IS NICE AND SEZ THERE IS LOTS MISTY HAS TO LERN ABOUT HERSELF AND IS WILLING TO HELP HER! FIRST OF AL THERE IS THE GITAR LESONS AND MISTY CAN NOW PLAY 3 SONGS (SORT OF) BY THE INDEGO GIRLS WHO ARE GOOD LIKE DIXIE CHICKS WEER BEEFOR THEY WENT COMY. AND 1 SONG BY DYER STRATES WITCH IS BORRING! NOW I NO WY GEORGE STRATES LEFT THAT BAND! HE IS BETER OFF BY HIM SELF I TEL U WAT!!! I THINK MISTY’S PLAYING WOOD SOUND BETER ON A GITAR THAT IS NOT PLASTIC BUT THE SHOPING NET WORK DID NOT HAVE WOOD ONES. BUT LORD NOS SHE IS SPENDING ENUFF TIME AT BROOKES PLACE THAT SHE SHOOD BE ABLE TO PLUCK ELVIS ON THE 6 STRINGS WITH NO HANDS BUT JUST HER TEETH AND TUNG! LOL!!

ANY WAYS LIKE I SED BEFORE MOST OF THE CUSTIMERS ARE MARINES AND COW BOYS AND NOW THERE ARE LOTS OF BIKERS THERE TO! BUT I DON’T KNOW IF THEY ARE REEL BIKERS AS MOST OF THEM R WEL KEMPED. LIKE WITH FLAT-TOPS BUT WITH NO LONG HARE IN THE BACK! AND SOME OF THEM DON’T EVEN HAVE THERE OWN BIKES AND HAVE TO RIDE ON THE BACKS OF AN OTHER GY’S BIKE TO GET THERE! WAT KIND OF BIKER DUSNT HAVE A BIKE I SAY! SOMETIMES IT LOOKS LIKE SOME OF THE BIKERS ARE THE SAME GYS WHO WERE AS COW BOYS THE NITE BEFORE AND MARINES DURING THE DAY. I WOOD SAY THAT THEY AL LOOK THE SAME TO ME BUT ONLY 2 OF THEM ARE CHINAMEN OR MAYBE IT IS ONLY 1 LOL!!

ANY WAYS THEY ARE ALL GOOD CUSTIMERS AND REALY PULITE IN AND OUT OF UNIFORM. LIKE AL MOST TO POLITE TO BE REEL MEN BUT THEY ARE MAREENS SO NO NEED TO GESS! LORD NOSE U GET TO LERN RESPECT AT PARIS ILAND AND WAT ROLE U WILL PLAY BASTE ON YOR VERSITILITY AND HOW HI TO JUMP I TEL U WAT!!

BUT LET ME TEL U THIS! THE DRAG SHOW I WAS SO XCITED ABOUT LAST MONTH WAS TO SAY THE LEEST NOT MARKETED VERY WEL! I DO NOT BLAME MISTY THO BEECOS SHE DID NOT PLAN THE EVENT AND WAT DUS SHE NO ABOUT DRAG ANY WAYS?! SHE LET A BUNCH OF THE CUSTOMIRS PLAN IT AND THEY NO WAT THEY LIKE I GESS! THE FIRST PROBLEM I COOD SEE IS THE FACT THAT THERE WAS NOT 1 DRAG RACING CAR THERE! NO RAILS OR FUNNY CARS OR EVEN PROSTREET! WAT?! SO I SED TO MISTY TO H-E-DUBBLE-L WITH THIS BEECOS MY FOOT WAS HERTING ANY WAYS AND I WENT HOME. IT TURNED OUT TO BE A GOOD THING I DID BEECOS ARE NEW BABYSITERS PROBASHUN OFICER TOD HER SHE HAS TO BE HOME BY 9 NOW INSTEAD OF 10 AND SHE FORGOT TO TEL US! ANY WAYS MISTY SED THE DRAG SHOW WAS REELY BISY ANY WAYS AND THEN THERE WEER LADY SINGERS TO BOOT! MISTY SED THAT MOST OF THEM WEER DUN UP TO THE 9S AND REELY TALL EVEN MORE THAN MOST OF THE FEECHURS AT MISTYS OLD JOB AT THE TOPLESS PLACE. SO SHE SED THAT THEY ALL JUST SANGALONG TO CDS BUT EVERY BODY LOVED IT NONE THE LESS. AND AT FIRST MISTY SED SHE DIDENT GET WY THEY DIDN’T SING ALIVE AND THEN SHE HERD THEM TOK AND SHE SES IT AL MADE SENCE THEN AND THEY SHOODNT SING! AND MISTY MADE A LOT OF TIPS AND PEEPLE SED HER CD PARTY WAS THE BEST EVER IN THE TOWN! WAT EVER FLOTES YOR BOTE I GESS! LOL!!!!

SO NOW U LIEBRULS HAVE THE LOWDOWN ON WAT’S WAT FOR ANOTHER MUNTH. I FIGER THAT IT’S OVIUS THAT U AL R NOT GOING TO GHANGE YOR HEETHEN WAYS WITH OUT MY HELP SO AS A MAN OF GOD AND A MAN OF BUSH I WIL BE CHECKING IN MORE OFEN!

WEL THE LIBERY IS CLOSING UP SO I HAVE TO GO. I NEVER SEEN IT SO BISY IN HEER AS IT IS SINSE THE AIR CONDISHINER UNIT WAS DONATID BY THE PARRISH

[Redstone]

1. And exactly WHAT do you propose to do to fix

the splitting brain-ache you just gave me?

(Good stuff, that. I'll remember to read in in several sessions next time.)

Redstone

[Zuni]

2. whoa

I just read that :applause:

[uppityperson]

3. Canuck you wanna marry me? Oh wait, I'm alreedy maried.

but i need you.byby

[GirlinContempt]

4. Oh man

I can't even make it all the way through

[mongo]

5. I know where u r cummin from

my employe is at one a dem gosh darn pagan festivuls right now i sure wish i didnt give hime any vacashun but oh well i make him work a cuple of ours every day fer free and he has ta piss in a cup cause he kant leave de regster.

its hard enuf ta find good help these days anyways - somebodie who don't watch porn all day and jizz up de regster arear, or sniker wen a ladie is bying a vibrater - dat is hard enuf for me HAHA!

got ta go put out de new magizeens now. i shure hope de new issue of lolypops is in dere. i like dem yungens

GOD BLESS G W! GOD BLESS AMERIKA!

[LordshipLadyship]

6. Just one question.

Does it scare you that you do that so easily? :D

It always reminds me of Mark and Marc, Morning Sedition, where Marc Maron says 'I'm turning into one of them! Oh Nooooooooo!" I love that show in general and I love that segment.


Ladyship
Listening to Randi on Quake radio in sf. Annd wayving att the sucky fripers causz der HUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(worshipping a floor lamp this very minute)

[sasquatch]

7. GOOD MORNIN' NEO CONS!!!!

:rofl:
Did you hear the one where O'Rielly stole Maron's bash on Boxer?
:D
That's sad when you have to steal ammo from Liberals because you're to pathetic to think of anything yourself.

[sasquatch]

8. I was missing the CanockAmok periodical FREEPLISH posting

:applause:

[elshiva]

9. Please, sir get a hold of yourself!