And why are the guys in tuxes for a 3 pm wedding, anyway?!

[Rabrrrrrr]

What the fucking fuck?!

Bad enough you make your "friends" buy ugly fucking dresses they'll never be able to wear again, and bad enough you're making your "friends" rent fucking buttugly tuxes, bad enough you put the gift registry in your invitations, bad enough you had the reception at a place that served sandwiches on plastic plates and served drinks (even "cocktails") in plastic cups and made your guests pay for milk and soda and it wasn't a fucking picnic,

BUT YOU'RE WEARING TUXES FOR A 3 PM WEDDING?!?!?!?!

Sorry, Charlie. Tuxes in early afternoon don't work; and tuxes for a wedding that ends with a reception in which everything is served on plastic, uses plastic utensils, and puts drinks that the guests have to pay for in plastic cups - that kind of wedding doesn't need tuxes.

Let's be consistent.

Oh, and let's be tactful, too, please.

[Shoeempress]

1. I agree completely. Weddings have gotten totally out of control.

And I HATE that people put the registry in the invitation, smacks of a gift shakedown. If I am close enough to you to be invited, I should be close enough of a friend to be able to call and ask where you are registered. I got invited to a "friend's" wedding in which I finally learned she moved and I don't have her phone number. So obvious she just wanted a gift.

[Shell Beau]

2. Well the groomsmen at my wedding wore tuxes for afternoon

and that is the way I wanted it. Tradition!!!! My bridesmaids picked out their own dresses. So they were happy! I was a very easy bride to get along with!! Very laid-back.

[liontamer]

3. what's wrong with tuxes

it's still a wedding

[tjwmason]

5. They're for dinner.

This is a habit which is starting to cross the Atlantic (dinner jackets at weddings I mean), I'm very unkeen on it personally.

[Shell Beau]

7. Not necessarily. If it is a formal occasion, suits or tuxes

are appropriate!

[tjwmason]

8. In American ettiquette

As I said, this nefarious practice is swimming the pond.

for day events - lounge-suits or more formally morning suits

for evening events - lounge-suits, more formally dinner jackets, even more formally (these look utterly gorgeous) white-tie.

It destroys the logic of the dinner jacket to wear it during the day.

[Shell Beau]

16. Who cares about logic? It is what the bride and groom want!!

[tjwmason]

17. That's choice

Not what is appropriate or inappropriate (As you said previously).

If a bride and groom with to get married in bermuda shorts (as mentioned below), then it's fine by me - that's choice.

I dislike dinner jackets for weddings because they are not the natural, logical or most appropriate garments.

[Shell Beau]

19. Well if I am decked out in an expensive gown and hubby's in a tux,

and my church is a very formal church, and there is a dinner following then it is appropriate!!

[northzax]

25. you want your husband to look like a waiter?

I can't, for the life of me, figure out hot tuxedos became 'fancy dress' I blame Prom night, actually. Morning dress for daylight hours, dinner jacket for dinner, tails for dancing.

what's the problem?

on edit: if that's the way you wanted it, then it's your wedding, everything's cool. I think bow tie tuxes should be worn by waiters, and the odd usher only.

[Shell Beau]

26. His tux was very unique and he looked nothing like a waiter!

He wanted the tux. Some of them can look very elegant! Some can look like a waiter! I have great fashion sense and would never let my hubby look like a waiter on his wedding day!

[northzax]

27. with you watching out for him

I'm sure the guests tipped well... :evilgrin:

[Shell Beau]

35. It paid for our honeymoon!!

[tjwmason]

32. I disagree - it's your choice, and good for you

But if it's during the day-time then I respectfully disgree about it being 'appropriate' (a very questionable word).

If it's during the day-time the 'appropriate' wear for men is a morning suit.

But as I say, your wedding, your choice - wear mourning suits, wear dinner jackets, wear bermuda shorts - makes no difference to me.

[auntAgonist]

14. I was married in 1977 and the men wore tuxes

2pm wedding. Nice dinner afterwards. It's tradition. Guests wear what they want, wedding party dresses formally. Bridesmaids ( in my case the maid of honour chose her own dress) have a say in what they wear.

nothing wrong with it.

[tjwmason]

4. English tradition is a morning suit

But then we don't call it a tuxedo either (though that term is sometimes used for the light coloured jackets worn with black-tie in hot climes) but a dinner-jacket - which rather implies that wearing one earlier is not quite right.

[matcom]

6. i hate Hate HATE weddings!!

loathe them. WAKES are more fucking fun.

and i have to go to one on 4TH OF JULY WEEKEND!! x(

who the fuck has their wedding on a LONG, HOLIDAY WEEKEND! :grr:

[SOteric]

10. *snicker* See my post below.

[SOteric]

9. Hee! I dunno, a lot of my friends are into 'theme' weddings.

About the best I ever attended was a couple who got married on the 4th of July at a large backyard barbeque.

The couple wore Bermuda shorts and Hawaiian shirts, the bride carried a bouquet of sparklers. Cold beer and soda were pulled from a cooler to toast the couple. Hamburgers, hot dogs and tofu weiners were grilled to order by the couple themselves. 10 pans of apple pie sported little plastic hula girls rather than the plastic couple so popular on cakes.

They'd both been married before and had two houses and three kids between them so they didn't want any loot. Those of us in attendence got together and made a big photo album of the two of them together and individually in our lives.

A good time was had by all. No one minded the plastic plates.

[matcom]

11. LOL!

unfortunately, this is FORMAL. "chicken or fish" sit down, formal, first dance, best man, shit AFTER a FORMAL service :grr:

[DS1]

34. Chicken or fish? Sitting down?

You should be on a flight to Vegas, and Reno, where there's a good supply of booze and hookers so you can get your wallet emptied and your knob polished by the true professionals

[Rabrrrrrr]

12. That's a wedding that sounds great!

The kind I would love to be part of.

i wouldn't have minded the plastic in this wedding if it wasn't a "formal, sit down" inside dinner. Had they made it a picnic, it would have been awesome!

But tables with tablecloths - and plastic everything? And making your guests buy their own fucking MILK?!

[Left Is Write]

15. Wow - I'll bet they loved that photo album!

What a great gift.

[Kingshakabobo]

21. I'll never forgive my brother for making me dress in tights

and a Robin Hood hat at his "medieval" wedding.:grr:

I avoided the cameras like the plague and shredded every picture of me that I could lay my hands on.

I got to keep the cool sword though.

[BeTheChange]

22. That sounds like a beautiful wedding..

My cousin just had a potluck reception that was so full of love. Everyone made special dishes and included a recipe for the new couple. Then the bride put them all together in a simple yarn bound packet and sent them out as thank you gifts. Its so great to have all of our family's recipes.

[Left Is Write]

13. We had no tuxes at my wedding.

My husband wore a suit of his own, as did his best man. My sister was my matron of honor, and she wore one of her own summer dresses.

We had our wedding at 11am, followed by a lunch reception at my parents' house. We served meat, cheese, an assortment of bread, vegetables, fruit, cake, punch, champagne, soda, and coffee, and no guests had to pay for a thing. But yes, we did use plastic cups. :) And we had nuts and mints. I had a thing about having the little paper cups of nuts and mints.

It was a nice afternoon reception, over by 3:00. By 9:00 that night, we were settled into our lodge on the north shore of Lake Superior, having our wedding supper in the restaurant there.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

31. That sounds like my kind of wedding!

:hi:

My cousin and his wife did a similar type thing. It was very nice. We set up a huge tent in our yard and just served lunch. The bride even got a grass stain on her dress. :P

[progmom]

18. because they hate you?

:hi:

[Rabrrrrrr]

24. Probably

:P

[Kingshakabobo]

20. My must you denigrate the institution of marriage?

What are ya gay or somthin?


:sarcasm:

[Rabrrrrrr]

23. Not gay, just liberal, and marriage scares me because I hate families

:P

[Niccolo_Macchiavelli]

28. we had a (real) wedding in fantasy-rpg setting

in a castle-ruin, with a entire pig over the fire with all dressed in some LARP clothing with medieval music bands.

We performed a druidic ritual

It was awesome. Sadly they are now divorced and hate each other.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

29. Really, what is the big deal?

Rabrrrrr, you know I'm always agreeing with you on things... but this isn't that big of a deal. I've been a bridesmaid and had to buy one of those fugly dresses, my brother's had to be a groomsman and rent a fugly tuxedo. But it's also THEIR wedding day, not yours. I'd want my wedding day to be laid out nicely too... and so maybe it's not your ideal, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices for other people. Who cares if a tuxedo in the afternoon violates some unspoken etiquette rule? I wouldn't care about that type of thing either, at my wedding. I'd go for what looks the best. I guess I just don't see where this is a big deal :shrug:

[underpants]

30. I did

so did my grooms men.

[Patiod]

33. OK, I don't get the whole big wedding thing

I understand every culture does it, blah, blah, blah It's certainly a cultural norm, I'm not dissing anyone who had one, but it's not for me.

My S.O. has proposed several times over our 13 years together, but the mere thought of planning a big formal wedding makes me physically ill. I've convinced him that we should elope somewhere interesting. We were thinking of Tombstone, but it's been done to death (although we know the mayor, which would make it kind of cool)

The small/cheap weddings I've been to have been bearable, but even so...maybe I just worked too damned many weddings at the local country club while I was in college

[Nikia]

36. My husband wore a tux for our even earlier wedding

As did his best man. My sister, the maid of honor, picked out her own dress. We had disagreements about the planning all the way along with both sides of the family and us with some things planned before others. We had a nice lunch/dinner at a local supper club that didn't open until dinner time. The whole thing was over before 5 p.m.
A couple months before we got married, we did attend a inconsistent wedding like that. The ceremony was medevil themed and very formal. Then the reception was at an American legion with picnic type food on plastic, including plastic table cloths.

[GreenPartyVoter]

37. Sorry, My hubby wore a morning suit for our Victorian wedding..and

we married even earlier than 3pm. (I wore white too, but that's a topic for another thread. ;) )

[Rabrrrrrr]

39. Yes, but that is appropriate

So you're okay.

:7

[GreenPartyVoter]

43. Phew! *g*

[the_spectator]

38. You've got it, but people are hopeless these days -

Yep, people should NOT wear tuxes ("dinner jackets") during the day.

But what can you expect? Thanks to the brain-dead "taste" of Hollywood at the Oscars over the past few years, what in hell has happened to the tuxedo anyway? Now it's just a black suit, with a black LONG tie, and maybe a black VEST also (which you are NOT supposed to wear with a dinner jacket - its supposed to be a cummerbund!)

The "modern" version of the tuxedo just makes people look like OVERDRESSED UNDERTAKERS!!!!

That's what has struck me about the Oscars over recent years -- while the women look like strippers, the men look like undertakers!

[Rabrrrrrr]

40. It just kills me

there are so many GOOD looking tuxes out there, good, classical, nice tuxes - but if you go to a tux rental place, the good classical ones (or nicely appropriate more modern ones) are only about 20% of the inventory.

The rest are crap.

Now, I will say - THANK GOD THE 70s and 80s ARE OVER! No more powder blue, powder green, powder fucking whatever that was so popular and now makes every wedding picture from that era, in which the brides (who generally were without taste in their MAD FUCKING RUSH TO HAVE THE PERFECTLY "WOO WOO" WEDDING) chose those godawful abominations.

But still, so many of the "tuxes" that are available at rental places look awful.

[Rabrrrrrr]

41. Here's some help:

Good tuxes:



Here are shitty ones:

[Rabrrrrrr]

42. And ladies, don't do this to your bridesmaids:

[Ekirh]

44. I'm glad

I've gotten my way (for now) and I can dress casually without a tux when I attend a friend's wedding next year.


I've only worn a tux once (For Senior Prom) and I hate dressing up like that... ugh.