I am Lothar, King of the hill people

[Ikonoklast]

Bring onto me an assortment of your finest meats, cheeses, and wine.

[48pan]

1. No. You are not. n/t

[Ikonoklast]

2. If you bring no offerings

Lothar will be much offended.

[48pan]

5. TS - Terribly Sorry.

[Ikonoklast]

8. Sorry you shall be

if Lothar remains hungry and unfed.

[48pan]

86. So now you're Yoda of the hand people?

[Ikonoklast]

87. Lothar has heard tales of this great warrior

From what far place does he hail?

[brainshrub]

3. This is the Lounge.

All we've got is SPAM, cheese-wiz and grape-juice.

[Ikonoklast]

6. Is this food? I am insulted!

Do not insult Lothar. The hill people will take great offense to it.

[brainshrub]

9. Be offended all you'd like, that's all we've got on the menu.

Try GD, I hear they have cold-cuts.

[Ikonoklast]

12. Your insolence is truly insulting

Lothar blames your ancestors for living.

[ET Awful]

4. I am Hank, king of the Hills.

Bring me a container of clean burning propane and some propane accessories.

[Ikonoklast]

7. I know of this Hank

my people have told me much about him. He knows not the way of the hill people, as he is a fat-land dweller and a pretender.

[WhollyHeretic]

10. I'm a veggie, would you be ok with a gardenburger?

[Ikonoklast]

11. Lothar is pleased with your offering

You are welcome in the halls of the hill people.

[WhollyHeretic]

13. Is there air conditioning in the halls of the hill people?

[Ikonoklast]

14. Lothar does not know that which you speak of

He is the King of the hill people and the air which we breathe is the clearest, coolest of all the surrounding lands. All things are better in my kingdom. I still hunger for your offerings, and Lothars' patience wears thin.

[Spacemom]

15. Wine and Cheese

Please, admit me to your kingdom, oh great one!

[Ikonoklast]

16. Lothar revels in your hospitality

and the hill people rejoice for their leader! You are welcome in our great hall to share our fire.

[leftofthedial]

17. And I am Hank, King of the Hills

get me another beer

[Ikonoklast]

20. You are a usurper and lowly-born

and are not worthy of the hill people. We are fierce and independent and fools trifle with us at their peril.

[leftofthedial]

21. get out of my alley

before Boomhauer kicks your scrawny "hill people" ass.

[Ikonoklast]

23. You are testing the benevolence of Lothar

few who have done so tell the tale to their offspring.

[leftofthedial]

25. Bobby, cut it out!

You aren't "Lothar."

Does your mother know you are using her bath towels for a cape?

[Ikonoklast]

26. Lothar is now grimly sharpening his war-axe

and you shall soon feel the embrace of cold steel. Swear forgiveness of Lothar or suffer his wrath!

[leftofthedial]

27. okay, put that down

before someone gets hurt

[Ikonoklast]

30. Do you yield to Lothar?

You may swear fealty upon Lothars' blade to spare your worthless life. Lothar shows pity to those that ask humbly, and the hill people respect my mercy to those that would do harm to them.

[leftofthedial]

32. I'm not quite sure what "fealty" is, but I'll make you a deal

Get me another beer, go find out what time supper will be ready, and I'll swear fealty

[Ikonoklast]

34. Lothar weeps for your children

even as he leaves them as orphans. They will be accepted as one of their own by the hill people and raised to be brave and strong, in spite of their ancestry.

[leftofthedial]

35. Dangit, Bobby!

I think it's time for "Lothar" to go inside and do his homework.

[Ikonoklast]

36. Lothar has decided that you are to be spared

only because the gods have affected your mind. Among the hill people it is well known that to hurt one such as you, it will bring dis-favor down upon my people.

[Crazy Guggenheim]

18. aaaaaAAAAAaaaaaaa AH!

[Ikonoklast]

24. A greeting worthy of a warrior

you must bring mead and flesh for we dine tonight at the great table together!

[Crazy Guggenheim]

28. I am "Berserker" Guggenheim. You must show your worthiness!

[Ikonoklast]

31. Of this man Lothar has heard great things

and the hill people respect warriors of great strengh and bravery.

[LastKnight]

19. tell us your wisdom of

walking through the hills with the women of your tribe...

ah... women... cannot walk with em, yet... you cannot club them...



wish that skit ran longer...

[Ikonoklast]

22. The warrior goddesses have smiled down with favor

upon the women of the hill people. They walk with no fear from any in my lands, and those that do not marvel at their strength and beauty are truly ignorant of my kingdom.

[barb162]

29. Oh Great One, we honor you and hope you keep peace with

your countrymen. Here are the meats, cheeses and wine as you requested.

[Ikonoklast]

33. Lothar accepts your offerings of peace

and all should call you a friend to the hill people. Enter the great hall and tell your stories to the children as they see strangers from other lands so seldom.

[barb162]

39. Oh Lothar, you are truly a just and kind Ruler

[Ikonoklast]

41. It is well known throughout all the land

that Lothar is good to his people. We share peaceful borders with those that ally themselves with the hill people, and live peacefully in our halls. The wisdom and justice of Lothar is marveled at by those that dine at his table.

[Blue Belle]

37. I've no assortment of meats and cheeses or wine...

But I do have a fruit roll-up and a Fresca. :)

[Ikonoklast]

38. You have insulted Lothar with this fodder

the swine of the hill people would turn up their noses at such as this. Hunger and thirst make Lothar ill-tempered and angry.

[Blue Belle]

40. Are you sure you don't want the Fresca??

It's very refreshing...

[Ikonoklast]

42. Lothar asks for mead and wine!

and you bring him swill! Lothar is not pleased with your paltry offering. There are limits to the patience of Lothar!

[Blue Belle]

46. What about a Tootsie-pop?? It's Cherry flavored??

By the way, Lothar, how do you keep your long hair so lustrous and manageable?? It's very becoming...

[Ikonoklast]

51. Lothar is baffled at your insolence

and the King of the hill people takes great offense at your tone. Lothar has the mane of a warrior king, and his countenance is striking to those that know him.

[Blue Belle]

53. Okay, Lothar.. I'm getting you some wine...

That way you can drink yourself a little happy :)

[Ikonoklast]

58. Lothar needs not strong drink for happiness

as being the King of the hill people is a joy unto itself. Your offering is accepted; enter the great hall and feast.

[barb162]

43. Lothar only drinks wine and clear icy water from the melted snow

from waterfalls from the high hills of the Hill People.

[Ikonoklast]

47. For one so young, you know the ways of the hill people

Lothar would ask the hill people to accept you as one of their own, a mighty honor indeed.

[barb162]

50. Lothar, your most royal and glorious Majesty,

your greatness and wisdom is apparent to all, including this humble and grateful servant. May all of your people celebrate your wisdom

[Ikonoklast]

55. The hill people will joyfully proclaim your name

as you enter the great hall to sit by Lothars' side. For many long years this day will be spoken of with awe.

[barb162]

64. Thou art the noblest of all rulers.

[Ikonoklast]

65. Lothar rules only by the voiced consent of the hill people

It is as it should be. Tyrants fear swift justice at the edge of a blade, but the will of the hill people is joyful burden that Lothar carries for them.

[barb162]

67. Wisest of all Kings!

[Ikonoklast]

72. The wisdom of Lothar is that of a simple man

trade fairly, govern strongly, defend fiercely, listen wisely, love deeply. That is the creed of the hill people.

[bertha katzenengel]

44. Inside family joke: "Lothar" is what we call antidepressants. Any anti-

depressant that anyone in our family takes is "Lothar."

Example:

Q: "Why is Bertha in such a shitty mood?"
A: "She let herself run out of Lothar."

It started when my sister was struggling for the name "Zoloft" and couldn't remember it. She stammered out "Lothar!" and the rest is history.

:7

[Ikonoklast]

54. Lothar is well-known among those in peril

and will come to their aid when called for in a loud voice. He is a great help to those who are truly in need, and swift justice follows in his path.

[bertha katzenengel]

56. But what if we are not of the Hill People?

:scared:

[Ikonoklast]

60. All those that are fierce and strong

bely the traits of the hill people. Lothar would be pleased to swear an oath of protecion to ally his people with such that desire his sword.

[bridgit]

45. hi Lothar, i'm bridgit, queen of the borg...

would you be so kind as to buckle my head to my ass bone sweety, thanks :thumbsup: oh...and help yourself to our buffet of alien meats, glitchy cyber chips & hydraulic fluids you're welcome in advance ~

[Ikonoklast]

48. Lothar knows not of that which you speak

but he fears for the soundness of your mind. He thinks that it is from unclean living, and sleeping on soft beds. The hill people do neither, and are fierce and strong.

[bridgit]

52. that's fine, my darling, the hills & their peoples...

will make a fierce & strong contribution nonetheless, and this is as it should be: Lothar, King of the Hill People

[Ikonoklast]

57. Lothar accepts his due

and returns loyalty with my protection. Enter the great hall and seat yourself amongst the blessed, and we will tell tales of ancient heroes far into the night.

[bridgit]

61. a glorious accord across space & time...

strewn & cast with stardust & moonbeams is within our grasp this night ~ the hive...has accepted, we are arrived:

[usedtobesick]

49. as King Arthur tells the black knight...

"You're a Loony!"

[Ikonoklast]

62. Of this Artur Lothar has heard

but a man who cannot keep his mate fulfilled deserves not to be a King for long. The mate of Lothar is strong and of fierce beauty, she is the pride of the hill people.

[usedtobesick]

78. it's a lie...

made up by the tabloids, Gwen and I are still happily married. The press is lying! Lancelot is gay, no straight guy can be that good looking and neat. Not that there's anything wrong with that or anything. Camelot is a pretty progressive kingdom.

[Ikonoklast]

79. Lothar hears such things but believes only that which he sees

Beware the bringer of news to your kingdom as those that would harbor malice against you speak smooth counsel in your ear. Lothar has heard as such, but the King of the hill people seeks no advice save that of his people.

[WhollyHeretic]

59. What do you call 10 hill people standing ear to ear?

A wind tunnel.

[Ikonoklast]

63. Lothar now knows that which you seek

but he has a fool to entertain us at supper. The hill people take great offense to insult; Lothar will not stay their wrath.

[WhollyHeretic]

68. I don't wanna talk to you no more,

you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster - and your father smelled of elderberries!

[Ikonoklast]

69. Lothar thinks that he may have room for you as fool

as you made Lothar smile at your imbecility. Lothar knows that you are brain-addled and will be generous with his hospitality.

[WhollyHeretic]

71. What hills are your people from? Ozarks?

[Ikonoklast]

73. Lothar is wise and patient

But there are limits to virtue when pressed. Lothar thinks that insolence should be punished, even that of a fool. The hill people know the wisdom of this.

[WhollyHeretic]

76. Is Lothar friends with The Rock? Or perchance Ricky Henderson?

I'm just noticing a similar fondness for speaking in the third person.

[Ikonoklast]

77. Lothar is puzzled by the manner of your speech

Lothar is friends of the rocks, the rivers, the lakes and forests of the hill people, but of this other person Lothar knows not. He must be insignificant as not one of the hill people know of him.

[Telly Savalas]

66. Kicked and nominated for greatest.

It's time to end the media silence on the plight of the Hill People.

[Ikonoklast]

70. As King of the hill people, Lothar is puzzled

The hill people live simply and in health in their great halls. We are the envy of all that know of us; we only wish that it was so everywhere.

[bottomofthehill]

74. All hail King Lothar

From the bottom of the hill

[Ikonoklast]

75. Lothar, King of the hill people acknowledges your salute

Even those that live at the foot of the hill country know of Lothar and his land. The hill people wish you long life and good crops.

[WMliberal]

80. can I be Boomhauer?

idunnowatchosayriyderboybutisureshowyouwhat

[Ikonoklast]

81. Lothar does not understand your manner of speaking

You must come from afar. As King of the hill people, Lothar understands the many dialects of his neighbors, but your speech is as gibberish and uncouth sounding.

[WMliberal]

82. wellhejusputmedownrightder

:beer:

[Ikonoklast]

83. Lothar wishes you well

and tell those in your own land that he wishes no malice toward them, even if they are barbarians. The gods wish Lothar to be tolerant of those less fortunate.

[WMliberal]

84. itscool imnominatinganbookmarkin disrighthere

boomhaueraintlaughedsohardsincethe ThingsNottoSayWhileWatchingPassionoftheChrist.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x818212

[Ikonoklast]

85. Lothar looks upon those that bring mirth to his Kingdom

as a boon to his people. We are a fierce and independent tribe, yet the stories told by those that pass through my kingdom entertain the children greatly.

[Sugar Smack]

88. I am Shuthar, queen of the hell people.

I was looking forward to making your acquaintance.

I bestow upon you gifts of Havarti and Shiraz.

I will feel free to kiss your ankle, now.

[Ikonoklast]

89. Lothar accepts your gifts on behalf of the hill people

They are pleasing to Lothar. Rise up, and seat yourself at the great table. Tell my people stories of your heroes.

[Sugar Smack]

90. My longest friend, Beatrix, has slain a thousand ninnies.

She came from her journey cold, hungry, and with a backpack. She looked a little like a dust-covered Uma Thurman, actually. We sat. She explained to me the intricacies of the fighting techniques she learned from the cruel tutelage of Pai Mei.

I am now the third master of the five-point exploding heart technique.

[Ikonoklast]

91. These things of which you speak vex Lothar greatly

you speak as one that has journeyed too far from their homeland and have lost touch with their tribe. Lothar has seen such as you become wasted away from longing to sit by their own fire.

[Sugar Smack]

92. Alright, "Bobby".

You just stop being vexed & go to the canteen this instant. The greatest of rulers need tutelage once in a while. Shuthar instructs you to dispatch a bagel with some cream cheese or scrambled eggs at once, to sate thine stomach and to quiet thine lips.

:P

[Ikonoklast]

96. Lothar fears the gods have not been pleased with your forefathers

as punishment to them they have taken affront at your existence.

[Oversea Visitor]

93. "I am Rahtol, from land across many seas"

Rahtol shake his head and laugh
Rahtol see King Lothar subject of Wimpy Chimp Emperor
Rahtol say
" Go forth, you people need you, they are in trouble, waste not the time on feast and beg not from the people for meat and wine. For Evil Emperor Chimp has rob them of much. So King Lathor prove yourself a man or let another lead in you place."

:evilgrin:

[Ikonoklast]

97. Lothar, King of the hill people bows to no man!

Your insults to Lothar are to be the words on your gravestone! Lothar is subject to no one except his own people. You have spoke your last words as a living creature; prepare yourself to argue with the gods why you should not be damned to the nether regions for all eternity!

[Oversea Visitor]

98. Poor Lothar

My words will be engraved on my gravestone as you wish, the insults immortalized for all eternity until the stone shall be but dust. I am not a warrior but a man of words. Sharp is my tongue as its pierce your heart. I but call you to greatness and yet Lothar only want a single hill a King and not an Emperor. Lothar dream of but a single grain of sand on a beach, blind is he for he cant see the beach. Does Lothar wish to travel across the mighty sea to visit me? For if not live I shall and so prove that Lothar is a but a warrior not unlike Groo.

[Orsino]

94. I am Brothar, of the Plains folk.

The harvest gods have not been kind to us. We therefore bring no great stores of meat, nor skins of new wine. We are daunted, though, by the great silence which comes to us from the hills, and bring to you funky fresh jams with which to make merry. Lo! the righteous groove shall motivate Hill People booties, and evil spirits shall gnash their teeth and be consigned to the darkness beyond the clouds. We of the Plains folk bring tunes, and great shall be the clamor.

Also, could I get some of those Cheetos?

[Ikonoklast]

95. Hail and well met, lowland dweller!

Lothar takes pity upon you and your brethren. The hill people are generous with their bounty to those that are truly in need. Bring your merry-making band into the great hall and eat your fill at Lothars' table.