Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:24 AM
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I managed to piss off my girlfriend last night and I'm quite sure that I'm being ignored this morning.
She mentioned yesterday (pre-blowout) that she needed an oil change.
Nice gesture/start to change it for her? Also, what else should I do?
Fight Scale (1-10) - 7.
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RubyDuby in GA
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:25 AM
Response to Original message |
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Also, give her some space. I know when I have a blowout with someone, I just want to go to my own corner and cool down.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:29 AM
Response to Reply #1 |
4. Thanks - Good idea. nt |
matcom
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:26 AM
Response to Original message |
Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:29 AM
Response to Reply #2 |
5. Haha, I can't afford that:) nt |
Richardo
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #2 |
6. Start with $1 for a Clark bar |
matcom
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:44 AM
Response to Reply #6 |
kick-ass-bob
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:27 AM
Response to Original message |
3. You didn't tell her she was fat, did you? |
Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #3 |
7. Oh hell no - would never do that...plus she's not fat - Were you |
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just lookin' for an excuse to use the new yoinks?
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Shell Beau
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:33 AM
Response to Reply #7 |
10. You missed a funny thread yesterday about fat wives I assume! |
Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:34 AM
Response to Reply #10 |
12. Hmmm...guess so - Odd because I stared at the monitor all day:) |
Shell Beau
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:36 AM
Response to Reply #12 |
13. That is odd b/c we made a huge deal |
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of it yesterday here in the lounge.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #13 |
16. Ah...I'm not a lounge lizard - usually don't check it as much as I |
Shell Beau
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:45 AM
Response to Reply #16 |
matcom
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:31 AM
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GiovanniC
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:30 AM
Response to Original message |
8. Depends on What the Fight Was About |
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I withhold judgement until that detail is revealed.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:34 AM
Response to Reply #8 |
11. ugh...didn't wanna go here but what they hey: |
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I mentioned in conversation that I'm not sure if I believe in love - the fairy tale type.
So then she wants to know what she is doing in this relationship - and fight ensues...
Yes, yes, I'll gladly accept the dumbass award for DU today - but it was really just said in passing and not meant to be taken as a doctrine that I base my life on.
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Spinzonner
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
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Edited on Wed Jul-13-05 10:46 AM by Spinzonner
What are YOU doing in this relationship.
Which she is also asking herself and perhaps not liking the answers.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:42 AM
Response to Reply #14 |
17. Ah I see...I didn't think of that. |
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OH crap - I'm beginning to see that I really messed up. *^$#@ - So what do you recommend?
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cally
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:50 AM
Response to Reply #17 |
24. Umm..explain that you don't think love |
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happens all at once like in fairy tales but love occurs through really getting to know someone and sharing like you are doing with her. Or something that is somewhat honest for you. Problem solved.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:53 AM
Response to Reply #24 |
28. Not bad...not bad at all... |
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I really do like her and I can see it developing into love but I just don't like the fluffy dreamy type of love that doesn't exist (and most people mistake for lust, IMO). I believe in the down to earth, "I just saw her pick her nose and eat it but I still want to kiss her" type.
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Spinzonner
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:50 AM
Response to Reply #17 |
25. First, figure out what you meant when you said that |
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And be honest when you discuss it with her.
Don't go into it with the intention of trying to 'fix' it. Let her decide what your answers mean to her and your relationship.
You may at least get credit for emotional honesty and sincerity.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:54 AM
Response to Reply #25 |
29. Yea I think that's what I need to do...it will be a bit difficult |
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though because it was a fleeting comment - I need a snapshot of my mind at that moment:)
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Mizmoon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
15. Freud says the only true jokes are puns and other language jokes |
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All else is veiled hostility.
Just something to think about ...
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:43 AM
Response to Reply #15 |
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So that means I was being hostile towards her - any suggestions as to why I would be that way?
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Mizmoon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:50 AM
Response to Reply #18 |
26. You'll have to see a therapist for that |
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I just do the armchair stuff ...
:)
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Richardo
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:49 AM
Response to Reply #15 |
23. I'm 'afreud' she's right... |
punpirate
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #23 |
36. Sorry, you're just... |
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... too Jung to make that assessment.... :P
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GiovanniC
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:45 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
21. You Shouldn't Have to Feel Bad About Beliefs |
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Or lack/uncertainty thereof. It sounds like she got mad at you for voicing an opinion. Now you are apologetic about your opinion and want to do nice things for her in response to the argument.
Sometimes it makes sense to try to do nice things and hope that a fight blows over. But be mindful that you don't give in or apologize for all of your beliefs or one day you'll find that that you have given up all of your convictions to a girl who has left to go find a guy who has firmer beliefs.
I guess what I'm saying is, I can see where saying you're not sure about the "fairy tale" kind of love might be upsetting to your partner. But at the same time, that's not really something she should get mad at you about.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:49 AM
Response to Reply #21 |
22. I couldn't agree more - and that is why I wasn't as worried |
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about it as I am now. I didn't consider the option that was shown me in post #14.
The hearer of something tends to look deeper into it than the speaker...or so it seems to me.
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nini
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:51 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
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if not.. or you don't KNOW you do... you should end the relationship.
When you love someone, you know it - you really know it and wouldn't even question it - in other words you wouldn't say you believe in love the way you did. Maybe she's just not the one to spark those emotions in you.
Hope it works out for you.
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 10:57 AM
Response to Reply #27 |
30. No I don't think I love her - and don't think I should end the |
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relationship because of that.
Based on that idea, only people who fell in love at first sight and knew it would ever stay together.
We haven't been dating the length of time that I would consider a reasonable length to be in love.
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nini
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:09 AM
Response to Reply #30 |
33. I should have said.. 'do you think you could love her' |
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not do you at this moment. I misunderstood your situation.
My take on fairy tale love is not the love at first sight type.. It's just that 'feeling' you get. When you have that feeling you will know why some people compare it to something magical.
Hopefully, you will find that one day, be it with her or another.
good luck
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Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:13 AM
Response to Reply #33 |
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And I think that that feeling you are describing was there.
Thanks for the good wishes:)
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lukasahero
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:03 AM
Response to Original message |
31. You could always just apologize |
Hosnon
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:08 AM
Response to Reply #31 |
RedCloud
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Wed Jul-13-05 11:26 AM
Response to Original message |
35. Duplicate thread. We already know about the 25,000 mile oil change. |
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First, if you have never had a fight before, apologize immediately and take steps not to do it again.
Now if you do fight periodically and she apologizes but you never do, you had better do so.
If only you apologize during arguments, there are many dating services that could help you...
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Thu Apr 25th 2024, 02:17 AM
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