What do you do when you're replaced?

[BlondieK143]

When the people that you care about most in the world no longer have a need for you? How do you move on from a loss that hurts so badly it feels like your heart is ripping into pieces? How do you move on?

You can't. Because somehow they're always going to be a part of you.

[Burma Jones]

1. Years Ago, I turned to the Beatles........

For No One...

Your day breaks, your mind aches
You find that all the words of kindness linger on
When she no longer needs you

She wakes up, she makes up
She takes her time and doesn’t feel she has to hurry
She no longer needs you

And in her eyes you see nothing
No sign of love behind the tears
Cried for no one
A love that should have lasted years!

You want her, you need her
And yet you don’t believe her when she said her love is dead
You think she needs you

And in her eyes you see nothing
No sign of love behind the tears
Cried for no one
A love that should have lasted years!

You stay home, she goes out
She says that long ago she knew someone but now he’s gone
She doesn’t need him

Your day breaks, your mind aches
There will be time when all the things she said will fil your head
You won’t forget her

And in her eyes you see nothing
No sign of love behind the tears
Cried for no one
A love that should have lasted years!

[lectrobyte]

10. I'd recommend some of these:

"Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler,
"Black" by Pearl Jam

Black


Sheets of empty canvas, untouched sheets of clay
Were laid spread out before me as her body once did
All five horizons revolved around her soul
As the earth to the sun
Now the air I tasted and breathed has taken a turn
Ooh, and all I taught her was everything
Ooh, I know she gave me all that she wore
And now my bitter hands chafe beneath the clouds
Of what was everything?
Oh, the pictures have all been washed in black, tattooed everything.

I take a walk outside
I’m surrounded by some kids at play
I can feel their laughter, so why do I sear
Oh, and twisted thoughts that spin round my head
I’m spinning, oh, I’m spinning
How quick the sun can, drop away
And now my bitter hands cradle broken glass
Of what was everything (note the lack of question mark)
All the pictures have all been washed in black, tattooed everything.

All the love gone bad turned my world to black
Tattooed all I see, all that I am, all I’ll ever be.

I know someday you’ll have a beautiful life, I know you’ll be a star
In somebody else’s sky, but why
Why, why can’t it be, why can’t it be mine

[MissB]

2. Unless they are

blood relatives, then time will heal that shitty feeling.

:hug:

[Lavender Brown]

6. Yes

Even if it doesn't go away completely. :hug:

[Beware the Beast Man]

3. ...

:hug: If this helps...

[Justpat]

4. You get through it a day at a time

and you have faith that this loss is making room for something
better to come to you.

Hang in there.

[lectrobyte]

5. Time and perspective.

Heavy drinking in the short term. Nothing is forever.

[GOPisEvil]

7. Take some time to heal yourself.

:hug:

[graywarrior]

8. Acceptance. It doesn't happen til you're ready.

We love ya.

[XemaSab]

9. Keep busy

Power through, and one day you will wake up and realize that most of the hurt is gone.

[MissB]

11. You can't go over it

You can't go under it
Oh no
You have to go through it.

[SarahB]

12. That's it.

Be sad and cry and eventually you get through it and understand yourself better. I'm sorry you're hurting, Blondie. :hug:

[Shoeempress]

13. I rely on bitterness and name calling. For instance, my entire family

are judgmental wing nuts whom I would not piss on if they were on fire. There, I feel better.

[BlondieK143]

14. Thanks all.

I guess after everything I've been through this past month, this is just the icing on the cake. *sigh* Sorry for polluting the Lounge once again with whiny antics. I just needed to feel loved for a moment.

[sniffa]

15. babe

you're Loved.

[gmoney]

18. His loss, BK

I wish stupid guys who can't appreciate a good woman would just STAY AWAY from them, instead of giving ALL men a bad rap based on these bums.

In the meantime, be good to yourself, do what makes you feel good, and be with people who truly appreciate you.

[LynzM]

16. Dude, that sucks

First, you get lots of hugs from your friends:

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Then, said friends take you out for (cyber-)beers:

:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:

Then you cry a bunch:

:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Lather, rinse, repeat. It gets better with time, but it hurts a hell of a lot in the meantime. Hang in there, call me if you want to talk, ok? :hug:

[stellanoir]

17. You can never be replaced

You are wondrous and irreplaceable though you may be for a short time temporarily supplanted.

Look. . . if you have a handful of people you can really rely on over the course of your life, then you are truly blessed.

It's impossible to tell when you first connect, whether someone is a "keeper" or not. Sometimes humans are very simply aligned for brief periods of time. But luckily, other times, it's for the long haul.

You are a total sweetie. Don't forget that.

[welshTerrier2]

19. you don't move on ...

you just be ... you just hurt ... and perhaps, if you pay attention, you grow ... and then you are elsewhere ...

if you figure out how to deal with loss, please let me know ...

sorry you're hurting, my friend ... just do whatever you're able to ...

[GoddessOfGuinness]

20. Make something better...

Then the hurt will only be a memory that you can use to the advantage of others by exhibiting compassion. :hug:

[Champ]

21. What happened?

Does it involve the marine guy? :hug:

[leftofthedial]

22. well, for starters, you can eat ice cream