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Jara sang Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:25 PM
Original message
Make up some shit and post it here.
I once played tennis with Andre Agassi. We played for a $2 bill. I beat him and he still hasn't payed me my two dollars yet.(Not really true, I made it up.)
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Misunderestimator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:26 PM
Response to Original message
1. I grew up at Buckingham Palace and I rode horses with Queen Elizabeth
Then we often had tea.
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:26 PM
Response to Original message
2. i once slept with Andre Agassi, after he cut off his hair
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mzteris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. I slept with him BEFORE
he cut off his hair. I refused to sleep with him again so that's why he cut off his hair .........
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:28 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Well I slept with 50 Cent
and then Eminem and LL COOL J joined in.
The DVD will be coming out soon.:evilgrin:
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:29 PM
Response to Reply #4
6. big fucking deal - i'm really the one in colin farrell's sex tape
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:31 PM
Response to Reply #6
10. Yeah, and the bitch in Tommy Lee's tape
ME!:evilgrin:
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 11:15 PM
Response to Reply #2
31. i hate you
i love andre. (after he cut off his hair.)
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
5. Not only do I eat creosote

I also smear it on toasted CD covers.

Crunch.
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #5
9. Also

I have a pet cow that can sing "Slap my Bitch up"
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:07 PM
Response to Reply #9
22. The creosote made me laugh
(lived about a mile from a creosote plant for a couple years...) but this one made me :rofl:!!!
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Cobalt Violet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
7. I gave Andre Agassi his first buzz cut.
Not true but ya buzz one ya buzz them all.
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roguevalley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
8. I didn't sleep with Andre. I prefer lacrosse players. On the other
hand, I am thin, rich and the proud possessor of a Ph.D in nuclear physics and a BS in BS. :-D
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:32 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. A BS in BS
:rofl:
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FuzzySlippers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:32 PM
Response to Original message
12. I was a lion tamer with the Shriner's Circus.
Edited on Thu Jul-21-05 09:33 PM by FuzzySlippers
I wasn't very good at my job. As a consequence, I have to type with my nose. Tsih si yhw uyo souhld be tlorenat fo my myna tposy.

Edit: tpoy
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Jara sang Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:33 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. You lost me at "I"
:shrug:
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:34 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. LOL!
That was funny!:rofl:
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:04 AM
Response to Reply #12
34. You are a very funny lady!
:hi:
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:33 PM
Response to Original message
13. And

I pop into the dreams of republican politicians from time to time. It's a lot of fun...
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Champ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
16. My mom played tennis against Andre Agassi's Sister
Edited on Thu Jul-21-05 09:36 PM by Champ
And met Andre Agassi when he was 2 swatting balls at the tennis court. This is NO shit.

Now shit, I taught Michael Jordan everything he knows :)
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
17. What's more...

Luckily for me, I have a packet of Coco Pops on a spring. BURP. BWAHAHAHA!
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:53 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. And not forgetting...

Entropy is slowly consuming my "Sometims I think life would be easier if I weren't so Pretty" mug. It's slowly transmogrifying into a copy of Fortean Times.
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Jara sang Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 09:54 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. don't you mean "Pop Rockz"?
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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:04 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. :blank stare:
Edited on Thu Jul-21-05 10:04 PM by baby_mouse
A have NO IDEA what you're talking about.

Are we discussing a crispy popped-rice based breakfast cereal with chocolate flavoured frosting? Because, if not, you are WRONG. If yes, you are RIGHT.



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Jara sang Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #20
25. Pop Rocks
Like rice crispies

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baby_mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:18 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. oo

strawberry flavour!

nice
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Elidor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:06 PM
Response to Original message
21. We're spreading fucking DEMOCRACY in IRAQ!!!
Edited on Thu Jul-21-05 10:07 PM by Hardhead
Ain't that a hoot? They fucking love us ever since we TURNED the MOTHERFUCKING CORNER. Our military bases are even now being turned into Flower Collection Stations, and Dubya will surely win the Peace Prize for his accomplishments there...
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:08 PM
Response to Original message
23. I met Stephen Hawking once....
We had a really neat conversation.

No, seriously.

And, I have Itzak Perlman's signature.

That one, I didn't even make up, I absolutely promise!
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Lilith Velkor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:59 PM
Response to Reply #23
29. Stephen Hawking kicked Jet Li's ass in a barfight last month.
I saw the whole thing.
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 07:48 AM
Response to Reply #29
32. Wow....
That, I'd like to see ;)
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:09 PM
Response to Original message
24. I shot JR!
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MisterP Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:32 PM
Response to Original message
27. Saddam has WMDs! (well, that was easy)
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spacelady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 10:47 PM
Response to Original message
28. I rode a bus with Freddie Mercury.
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Roland99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-21-05 11:05 PM
Response to Original message
30. I'm Batman
Edited on Thu Jul-21-05 11:06 PM by Roland99
Oh wait....that's true!
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 07:52 AM
Response to Original message
33. I am Carol Burnett and Harvey Korman's love child.
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Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:08 AM
Response to Original message
35. Bumble bees will suck out your eyeballs if they land on your head.
My Dad told me that when I was a little kid. He had a bizarre sense of humor.
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Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
36. Neil Patrick Harris stole my car!
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Evergreen Emerald Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:32 AM
Response to Original message
37. I woke up this morning with my cat standing on my chest
Edited on Fri Jul-22-05 08:41 AM by Evergreen Emerald
My usually closed bedroom door was wide open and I saw my small dog by the door looking up at us. "Tell her." I could have sworn I heard my dog talk. I rubbed my eyes and wondered if I were still asleep. "Tell her." It was him! He was talking. His voice was lower than I imagined it would be, and a bit raspy.

My beautiful loving kitty, who sleeps at my feet opened her mouth and whispered in a melodic sing-song voice, "You snored again last night and our water dish is empty. You try drinking out of the toilet." "We can't take it anymore."

I rolled over and looked at my husband who said,"it doesn't taste that bad actually, but it makes your tongue blue." He stuck out his blue tongue.
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kick-ass-bob Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:34 AM
Response to Original message
38. I know for a fact that Freddy Adu is really
37 years old.
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:39 AM
Response to Original message
39. Barbara Boxer doesn't really have that surname. She calls herself that
because she is a boxer, in the sport sense. She also doubles as Howard Dean's and Dennis Kucinich's personal trainer.

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NoPasaran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-22-05 08:48 AM
Response to Original message
40. The feud between Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly is all my idea
You won't believe the next wacky stunt I've written!
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