It's time for "Happy Fun Ball"

[Technowitch]

(kids)
It's Happy!
It's Fun!
It's Happy Fun Ball!

(announcer)
Yes, it's Happy Fun Ball,
the toy sensation
that's sweeping the nation.
Only 14.95 at participating stores!

Get one Today

(background voice)
Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.

Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Happy Fun Ball contains a liquid core, which if exposed due to rupture should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.

Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs:
* Itching
* Vertigo
* Dizziness
* Tingling in extremities
* Loss of balance or coordination
* Slurred speech
* Temporary blindness
* Profuse Sweating
or
* Heart palpitations

If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.

Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration.

Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.

Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.

Happy Fun Ball has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee.

(announcer)
Happy Fun Ball! Accept no substitutes!

[slackmaster]

1. The disclaimers sound like a prescription drug ad

Do not taunt Vioxx!

[Technowitch]

2. Vioxx, Nexium, etc, yep, you get the idea

Only Happy Fun Ball is... well, fun!

:bounce: <-- only lethal sometimes

[tedoll78]

3. I can still hear Phil Hartman narrating it..

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Hills/7945/Coverhead.wav

[Technowitch]

5. Me, too. I can't for the life of me figure why...

...this suddenly popped into my head.

It's started with "Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball..." Still makes me giggle.

[no name no slogan]

4. Oh shit, I just taunted Happy Fun Ball

:o

[Technowitch]

6. Careful, Happy Fun Ball grows angry with thee, foolish mortal

:bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

[Cathyclysmic]

7. you forgot 'explosive diarrhea'.....

truly the best side effect of 'happy fun ball'

[Cannikin]

8. Probalby my favorite SNL commerical

[Technowitch]

10. The first to surpass the Super Bass-o-Matic '76, IMHO

Spokesman: How many times has this happened to you? You have a bass, and you're trying to find an exciting new way to prepare it for the dinner table. You could scale the bass, remove the bass' tail, head and bones, and serve the fish as you would any other fish dinner. But why bother, now that you can use Rovco's amazing new kitchen tool, the Super Bass-o-Matic '76. Yes, fish-eaters, the days of troublesome scaling, cutting and gutting are over, because Super Bass-o-Matic '76 is the tool that lets you use the bass with no fish waste, and without scaling, cutting or gutting.

Here's how it works: Catch a bass, remove the hook, and drop the bass - that's the whole bass - into the Super Bass-o-Matic '76. < drops the bass into the blender > Now, adjust the control dial so that the bass is blended just the way you like it. < turns blender on and grinds it to a pulp > Yes, it's that simple!

Bass-Drinker: < drinks a glassful of bass > Wow, that's terrific bass!

Spokesman: We've got fish here, fast and easy and ready to pour, mmm-mmm! Super Bass-o-Matic '76 comes with ten interchangeable rotors, a nine-month guarantee, and a booklet: 1,001 Ways to Harness Bass. Super Bass-o-Matic '76 works great on sunfish, perch, sole, and other small aquatic creatures. < blends one of each >

Super Bass-o-Matic '76 - it's clean, simple, and after five or ten fish, it gets to be quite a rush! Super Bass-o-Matic '76 - you'll never have to scale, cut or gut again!

[Deja Q]

9. I bought 2 of them. I looove playing with my happy fun balls!

And when you buy two you get a free broomstick to bat them around with!