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Character Assassin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:03 PM
Original message
Southern Baptists endorse 'utter servitude of women'; wives detained
Southern Baptists endorse 'utter servitude of women'; 14 missionary wives detained overseas.

http://larknews.com/june_2003/secondary.php?page=baptist_servitude

PHOENIX — Members of the Southern Baptist Convention voted during their annual convention this week to affirm the "utter and complete servitude of women to men, in all things domestic and spiritual, with no qualifications," their most dramatic position on an issue that has divided its ministers for years.

"We saw this coming, but it's still ugly," said Barry Nagusi, an opponent of the resolution who was beaten by fellow pastors when he tried to speak against the resolution. "My wife wanted to say something, but they shut off the mic and hissed like snakes until she sat down."

Behind closed doors, supporters were jubilant. "Hot dog! We did it," said Roy Bennings of Tulsa, chief architect of the resolution. He stood on a chair and lifted a glass of sparkling apple juice. Others lifted Coors Cutters and began to chant, "Whoo! Whoo!" This prompted someone to turn on "Who Let the Dogs Out," and the men sang with verve and slapped high fives. After a while, Bennings continued with his speech, declaring that the "Millennium of the Man" had begun. He stepped down and shook hands as the Rolling Stones' "Under My Thumb" played in the background.

"This really is a victory for men and women," he said in more subdued tones to a reporter. "It places women in a position of honor where God ordained they should be. We have a lot of respect for women, in their proper sphere."

To show muscle, the SBC International Mission Board immediately sent enforcement squads to several overseas countries and took 14 missionary wives into church custody. The women had ignored demands to sign oaths of servitude mandating that they stop wearing pants and not speak in public. SBC commandos bound them hand and foot, put hoods over their heads and shipped them to a secret detention center to await the results of a disciplinary committee.

A secret panel of U.S. justices said the women could be considered "wards of the denomination" because they had allowed their U.S. citizenship to lapse. The SBC won't say where the women are being held, except that "they're not in Gitmo, or any country where rules of interrogation don't apply."

Some husbands saw the move as sad, but necessary. "You can only thumb your nose at your spiritual authorities for so long," said a missionary to India who wanted to be identified only as Roger. He and his three children are waiting for word on their wife and mother, Martina, who was seized by SBC commandos in a 2 a.m. raid outside Bombay.

(snip. More at link) http://larknews.com/june_2003/secondary.php?page=baptist_servitude
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omshanti Donating Member (851 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
1. This is a joke, right?
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theivoryqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:22 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. Yes, the websites disclaimer states it is satire
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spinbaby Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:08 PM
Response to Original message
2. I sure hope that's a parody site
n/t
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. Parody
I doubt the neanderthals in the SBC are listening to the Stones. ;-)


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Aristus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:28 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. Supernova! How dare you?
That's a horrible thing to say about the noble Neanderthal!
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PVnRT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:27 PM
Response to Original message
5. That is hilarious
n/t
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BlackVelvetElvis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 12:28 PM
Response to Original message
6. There is a fine line between parody and truth
Funny! I bookmarked this site.
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The Backlash Cometh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 02:00 PM
Response to Original message
8. It's like reading the minutes of a Taliban meeting before the Taliban
really became evil.
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YellowRubberDuckie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-03 02:20 PM
Response to Original message
9. It wouldn't surprise me in the least if it were true.
My former pastor was president of the southern baptist convention when I was in high school. That man already believes women belong there. I'm surprised they let us sing the choir. He also believes that God doesn't want us to love homosexuals, but basically stone them until they change teams again. Hell have a nice little place in hell next to Pat Robertson. I don't want to share my heaven with little pigs like that. And yes, I'm bitter at the southern baptists. They are a huge problem in this country.
Duckie
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