Legal clearinghouse for injury claims against sundog for "Squidy Incident"

[Hugin]

Post your PTSD symptoms here.

They will be reviewed by our elite team of shrinks...
I mean. Mental Health Professionals.

[Hugin]

1. I'll get this rolling...

I have nightmares... I can no longer eat calimari...
I can't take my "Joint Juice" which includes "Shellfish
by products".

I can no longer perform my marital duties.

My family claims, "I've changed".

There's also the *cough* explosive diarrhea *cough*

I have a sample here.

[Hugin]

2. Yup... You sound pretty sick to me.

Send the bill to sundog.

NEXT!

[ltfranklin]

3. Well, here's the problem...

Ever since the "Incident", I've become a ravening nymphomaniac. This is really causing problems for me because (a) I'm a guy and (b) I couldn't get laid if my life depended on it these days.

On the bright side, I'm getting some good material for a WB sitcom.

[Hugin]

4. You *want* to write a WB sitcom?

Man! You are sick.

Take this thorazine and straight jacket and report
down to the gentlemen in the white smocks.

We'll hold your settlement in trust... (Yeah, thats it)
'till you get better.

NEXT!

[ltfranklin]

5. Well, part of me does...

...and part of me doesn't.

Hey, that's Schizophrenia!!! Can I get a double settlement for multiple personalities?

[Hugin]

6. Yes.

You have to only spend one half of the settlement while
in each of the personalities though.

[ltfranklin]

7. That's ok...I've got it figured out.

Each of my personalities is going to write a will leaving the other the bulk of the settlement. Then, they're going to draw straws, and one of them is going to throw himself off a cliff.

The survivor gets all the money!

But not me...I'm keeping my share, the other two personalities can work it out between them.