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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 09:58 AM
Original message
Chewing gum in the workplace should be punishable by death
That is all.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
1. Chewing gum anywhere should be punishable by death
Edited on Mon Aug-15-05 10:00 AM by Rabrrrrrr
and I say that we allow "citizen's execution" in the case of chewing gum.

Stupid bovine gum chewing pieces of shit.

Do people not realize how fucking idiotic and low in intelligence they look when they're hammering away at a cud of gum?

Fuck.
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MindPilot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
2. So should eating sunflower seeds...
...slow painful death.
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SouthernDem2004 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:01 AM
Response to Original message
3. Dipping chewing tobacco... Kill 'em all.
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:08 AM
Response to Original message
4. Fine, Mr. Rulemaker - groups of people who stand right outside of
a building to smoke cigarettes, making other people run through a gauntlet of nasty smoke should be summarily shot. :P
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:09 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. if they would let us smoke in our cubes
Edited on Mon Aug-15-05 10:15 AM by matcom
you wouldn't need to run through the cloud on your way in! :D
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:13 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. I think a designated "break room" would be better.
far, far away.... :P
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:16 AM
Response to Reply #4
7. Rules?
People that dig through their coupons AFTER the cashier goes through all the stuff to see what applies should be subject to the checkout laser going full power and slicing them to pieces on the spot.

Anyone caught waiting for someone to pull out of a parking spot for more than 30 seconds should have their car picked up by the parking lot magnet crane and dropped in the crusher with them still inside it.

People that go to a chain fast food restaurant and wait all the way through the line before looking up at the suddenly foreign menu and then starting to decide what they want should be chopped up into a french fry size pieces, thrown in the deep fryer, and shipped to India as non-beef chicken fries.

Arcades that insist on using non-refundable tokens should be blown up with smart bombs.

Private airline pilots who make miraculous landings on public highways should be congratulated on their flying prowess, then locked inside their planes and burned.
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:17 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. but how do you feel about rabbit fuckers?
:D
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:17 AM
Response to Reply #8
9. Why the hell would I care?
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:24 AM
Response to Reply #7
10. People who haven't filled out one part of their check until the cashier
Edited on Mon Aug-15-05 10:33 AM by JimmyJazz
tells them the amount of the bill should be hung upside down in public.

People who stop immediately after stepping off an escalator should be pushed back down it.

People who push their shopping cart down the middle of an aisle should be forced to use only a handbasket for the rest of their lives no matter how large their order and groups of people who walk slowly side by side whether down an aisle or a sidewalk, blocking anyone who just might walk a bit faster should be shot at sunrise (without having a last cigarette)

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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:25 AM
Response to Reply #10
11. I'd go a step further with the handbasket
and surgically give them a kangaroo pouch
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MN ChimpH8R Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:33 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. Escalators
Yes indeed. What is WITH these asshats who step off escalators and stop? Do they think no one is behind them? Do they have even the dimmest, slug-like awareness of their surroundings?

And the cretins who wait for the elevator doors to open so they can charge in, trapping those trying to get out..
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:36 AM
Response to Reply #12
13. They do the same thing getting off planes, too
Which is probably why they stopped allowing machetes as carry-on baggages
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:43 AM
Response to Reply #7
15. People who pull out in front of 30 mph traffic doing 5mph
for 50 to 100 feet, who suddenly slam on their brakes, THEN use their turn indicator, then slowly make their turn should be run over with a monster truck, a tank or some kind of car crushing vehicle, not completely killed, but allowed to die slowly and painfully.
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. I wasn't going to even get into my pet peeves about driving, but
since you brought it up: What about when traffic is slowed or stopped and some jackass has to drive down the shoulder and cut into the stopped traffic? What should be done? I personally cannot fathom a punishment worthy of these individuals.


(aren't WE the compassionate liberals, today :P)
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #16
26. I often hang half my car in that lane, if I see them coming up
I become apoplectic when some fucking wuss in front lets these GDCSers in
OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

And yes, the fact that we advocate mostly death as opposed to years of torture and meals of moldy bread that has been pooped on by vermin and peed on by prison guards makes us VERY compassionate indeed. :P
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #26
27. It's not our fault they need correcting.
Would it be more compassionate to let them continue in thier heathen ways?

/Spanish Inquisition
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tjwmason Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:36 AM
Response to Original message
14. Absolutely - and we'll start with Ricky Ponting
Captain of the Australian Cricket team - every single time that I've seen him on T.V. he's been chewing away. :nuke:

It's 269-7 at the moment - with the Ozzies needing 423 to win, or to last until the end of play to draw.
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:50 AM
Response to Original message
17. somebody's in a bad mood today
:P
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:52 AM
Response to Reply #17
18. as opposed to what other day?
:o
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:53 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. he was so zen, peace & love last week
:P
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 10:58 AM
Response to Reply #19
20. Then I had someone leaning over my shoulder chewing gum
asking me the same cycle of questions over and over again, obviously not listening to the answers.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:00 AM
Response to Reply #20
21. I hate those fuckers.
And I hate the fuckers who think it's okay to eat their sandwich, or celery, or carrots, or fucking whatever, right behind me while peering over my shoulder. And of course, those subhuman scum filth are only there so that they can talk to me, so not only do I have to listen to their filth-informed chewing with their mouths open, but also their lower-class useless shitbagger paradigm of talking with their mouth full of shit.
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:03 AM
Response to Reply #20
22. was he/she snapping the gum?
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:04 AM
Response to Reply #22
23. No, no snapping, I'd be in the back of a Crown Vic if there was snapping
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sundog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:05 AM
Response to Reply #23
24. could you smell the flavor of the gum?
:nuke:
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-15-05 11:10 AM
Response to Reply #24
25. Mint
it's not even gum, it's a breaht chew thing that's about 4 hours beyond its expected lifecycle
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