OK, this has been bugging me.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

I was thinking about the earlier thread "How many of you could leave a pet behind in the case of an emergency?"

I share the sentiment that I hope to jeebus that I nor anyone I love is EVER faced with this choice.

Many people responded very quickly with... no, never.. not in a million years, etc. Yes, your pets mean the world to you, I get that.

However, I have been thinking about it through another set of eyes the past hour or so. I imagined a loved one making that decision. Deciding to stay behind and face possible death, starvation, suffering, injury, etc because, when given an opportunity to assure safety, they were told that they had to leave the pet behind and opted not to.

I'd be sick about it. No communication the past 5 or 6 days; wondering if my loved one was alive. Wondering if they were suffering.

So, my question to you is this: if you are a parent, a child, a grandparent, a grandchild, an aunt or uncle, a niece or nephew, a cousin, a friend, a boss, a co-worker... and someone cares about you, and would worry for a second about you - would you still make the same choice?

Just wondering...


On edit... are you a parent? And if so, is that a factor?

[short bus president]

1. my pets are highly mobile and could surely follow me

well, OK, one is highly mobile and the others are easily carried.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

3. But, in the exact circumstances we saw this past week.

If you are given the choice... get on the bus w/o the critters or stay behind?

Thinking about specific people who love YOU... and how worried sick and confused they'd be by your decision... would you get on the bus?

[LisaL]

4. If you constantly worried what people that love you would think,

there are a lot of things you couldn't do because that might worry your relatives.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

6. This is NOT about what they'd think of you, or how they'd judge you.

But... people who love you need you. My son needs me. I'd put 'being there' for him above the live of a pet. I know that much.

[hfojvt]

24. not past a certain point

I am 43 and my family is far away. My pets are my loved ones, well at least 2 out of 3 are. Of course, if I had to evacuate, I would be relying on my sister to provide transportation or housing unless a rental car was available. My sister also took the dogs when I was in the hospital for four days and my parents took them when I went to Europe and when I went to NY. So they are immensely helpful even if they are not a significant part of my life quantity-wise.

[xmas74]

26. Same for me and my daughter.

I understand what you are saying. I love my pets but I love my daughter more. She needs me. I'd have to think about what is best for her.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

27. That's my point. Not whether I value *MY* life over my pet's.... but

whether my life is more valuable to others who love me than my pet's.

I am a mother, so it is. End of story.

[short bus president]

7. I don't think so.

I mean, a certain death scenario might yield a different choice, but in the exact circumstances of your scenario, where survival is not improbable, much less impossible, I'd probably not abandon my pets. I have a duty to take care of them, ya know?

[Jamastiene]

38. I'd find a way to contact my relatives and try my best

to keep my pets. I've been in a situation where I had to make a decision involving my pets and I had them put to sleep rather than see them be abandoned and suffer. I regret it now. At the time, I had no other choice. They would have been too vulnerable to anything and everything because they had been inside pets before I became homeless. They just didn't have the street smarts to handle the alternative. I knew I couldn't take care of them in any humane way. I couldn't even take care of myself at that point. I ask for forgiveness from them every single day. I truly regret and hate myself for betraying them, but it would have been a worse betrayal to abandon them. In the end, I betrayed them because my only two choices were betrayal(the needle) and abandonment in a harsh situation.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

39. .

You should forgive yourself. You made a humane decision.

I'm sorry that you had to go though that. :hug:

[LisaL]

2. If we couldn't do anything dangerous because

relatives worry about us-well, people wouldn't be jumping from airplanes, racing cars, climbing mountains, working as police officers and doing all sorts of other things.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

5. This is very different.

Again - exact sickening circumstances as all those people on Gulf Coast. You'd still get on the bus?

I am not judging in any way, just extremely curious.

[LisaL]

8. How is that different? I can not live my life only doing things

that won't worry my relatives. Can you?

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

9. This is way different than bungee jumping or extreme cliff-diving...

This is a natural disaster of epic proportions.

I see it quite differently and would take all of my family and the people I love into consideration when making a decision.

Like I said, just wondering. By the way, someone I love agrees with you...

[LisaL]

10. Yes, it's different. When you bungee jump, you risk your life for

nothing. And yet people still do it.

[short bus president]

11. Difference here is between

"worrying relatives" and abandoning responsibilities to those relatives in favor of responsibilities to pets. Notice one of you is talking about worrying parents or grandparents, and the other is talking about a child. Differing sets of responsibilities to those different sets of relations.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

15. Or death. You could die. You and your pets could be no more.

[short bus president]

17. No way!

We'd just be pining for the fjords!

:P

[Liberalynn]

31. If I were a Mom

I know I would have to be there for my child and would have to leave the pet, but I am not a Mom so as you point out Short bus my circumstances are different. I am a daughter and a sister and a cousin but as long as I knew my Mom was cared for and my sister was would be safe, I would stay for my dog.

People who jump out of airplanes unless it's for rescue or emergency or people who race cars do it for their own personally motivated reasons. A rush or a high without considering whether their family will worry. They know the risk, that they could die leave loved ones grieving but still do it any way. People who stay after a disaster to take care of their pets are doing it out of love and compassion for another living being and I would hope other adult relatives would understand that. If you are responsible for a child that's different but I am not.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

32. I agree... and was looking to explore how life circumstances can change

the decision. In case you didn't see, someone I love dearly would stay with his pets. And I would worry sick and be angry and confused. BUT, I would understand and I do understand.

It's an extremely thought-provoking topic. I'd like to think, like so many life decisions, one that there is no 'right' or 'wrong' answer for. Situations change priorities drastically. I just was looking for further perspective from people who have some different circumstances and/or views.

I don't think that you're less of a person for the decision you'd make. And, I sure hope people wouldn't consider my decision betrayal or abuse...

[Liberalynn]

33. Cyndee

in no way do I consider that you would be betraying your animal or that it would be animal abuse. You'd be acting out of love and compassion for your child and that's a wonderful thing and totally understandable.

You are a Mom and having a child does change the situation. You have to get children out of dangerous situations and be there for them growing up.

Let's just hope we all never have to face this situation and give our heartfelt sorrow and compassion and understanding to all those who did and made the choice either way. It had to be so hard and heartbreaking.

:hug:

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

34. Thanks for that. It's the Katrina victims I worry about...

They HAD to decide. Thousands. And, given the economic conditions, I have no doubt that a sick amount of poor animals were left behind. Lots of poverty and likely a ton of single moms.

But, no one should judge those people for the decisions that they have had to make.

BTW, both terms were used today on DU on this topic.

:hug:

[hyphenate]

12. I would still make the same choice

regardless. I would make certain that I was able to make a contact with the outside world, though, insofar as I could, but my animals are my family first nowadays, and I would never abandon them, no matter what the cost.

There is something so simple about the love of an animals and for an animal. They love you in return no matter how you've treated them, and they have no voice of their own to ask for help. As long as we count them as domesticated pets, they are OUR responsibility, and one responsibility we must adhere to. They can not live without us, and frankly, I don't think many of us would or could live without them.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

14. Do you have kids?

Again... just curious as to whether that's a factor or not...

[hyphenate]

16. No. And I never intended to, either

I know the old argument about which is it gonna be, the children or the pet, but even if I had kids, they would all be in their late 20s or early thirties and long gone by now. Seeing as I helped raise my niece in California, I know that point, but there is such a time as someone has to release their hold on children and let them make the choices and decisions of their own. A pet doesn't have that luxury to "live on its own."

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

18. When discussing with my mom, she said - 'Once a parent, always a parent.'

I am 33 and still need my parents every day of my life. I love them dearly and know that they'd choose to remain there mentally and physically for their kids and grandkids over their pets... in a heartbeat. They 'let me go' years ago; but that bond transcends any with any pets.

I don't think it's an 'argument', but a point to ponder.

[liberalitch]

13. The people who love me raised me this way and....

wouldn't expect me to leave a pet behind because they wouldn't either

[Tallison]

21. Exactly

My mother recently told me, "I hope you'd never leave Charlotte and Fud behind in an emergency."

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

23. And, my mom would freak if I risked my life, potentially leaving my son

without his mom... if the decision were to get on a bus and live or stay for a pet.

[philosophie_en_rose]

19. I'd still rescue my pets first.

I feel that I have an obligation towards my pets, because they depend upon me and because they provide comfort and companionship. Therefore, I have a duty to protect them, because they cannot protect themselves.

I think my family would worry, regardless of my pets. If I really had to choose, I would save a child over a pet. However, I don't think that it's a fair question.

There is no reason that people can't be rescued with pets. None. There's no reason that the humane society shouldn't be allowed to go and rescue strays. None.

Forcing people to make a choice of leaving their pets behind or going to some unknown and frightening location exacerbates the stress and suffering.

[friesianrider]

20. My mother would stay and die with her animals.

And I love her. Not only would I support her decision, I would be right there with her. She raised me to care for my pets the same as my children, and do what it takes to save their lives the same I would any family member.

Anyone who loves or cares about me knows I would never leave my pets in an emergency. It is just who I am, and while I understand they would worry, they would know beforehand that if I can't get my pets out, I am not leaving, either. It would have to be something they had to accept.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

22. See.... I (as many others are) am a single mom. The only parent.

I'd make the safer choice - the choice that offered better chances of survivial to remain there for him.

[enigmatic]

25. I wouldn't leave them

Period. End of story. Negative. And those who love me would understand WHY I wouldn'r leave my kitty, because they are part of me.

[Pharlo]

28. As the single parent of a young child, your reactions

will always be funnelled through the 'what's best for my child?' perspective - especially while he's dependent upon you. That's how it's supposed to be - it's called parenthood.

My perspective goes through an entirely different filter. My household consists of myself, three dogs, and a cat. If they're not welcome, I'm not going.

There is a direct correlation between my emotional well being and the presence of my animals. To compound the situation, I don't know how long I could last in a shelter situation in the best of conditions...I would have EXTREME difficulty living in such close quarters with other humans. Animals don't bother me, but I find humans to be highly annoying.

The freedom of not having a child to think about allows me to consider other factors. As to how my response will affect other full grown adults - they can make their choices, I'll make mine.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

29. Yes, that's why I was trying to understand perspective.

Obviusly life circumstances are a huge factor in a decision like this. I was speaking from mine and looking to understand one different than my own. I repsect the many differing choices we all have.

Antother thing I've considered - jeebus forbid if I did have to make this decision ... I'd multiply my efforts to help animals in need. I'd like to think that I could help more pets by staying around as long as I can. :)

[mac56]

30. I would never, could never, leave my dogs.

That's it. End of story.

[Vektor]

35. I'd never leave my pets.

I'd do my best to communicate to my loved ones that I was ok. When I finally got out, they'd see I was ok, everything would be alright. If I left my pets, my loved ones could rest assured, but my pets would die. Not worth it.

If I died trying to save my pets, so be it. I have no kids, don't want kids, so they are my babies. I'd go out like that.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

36. And, beauties they are...

I repeat... gorgeous!!

[Vektor]

37. See? How could I leave them?

Answer: I couldn't.

[HuskerDU]

40. I could not leave my pets behind no matter what.

They cannot survive on their own and depend on me. Whatever good or bad comes to them lies squarely on my shoulders. I would go down with the ship rather than look at a deserter in the mirror.