Pick your favorite 2008 Republican candidate for president!

[midnight armadillo]

Notes on each candidate:

- Dick Cheney: A cyborg existing to promote wealth for the few and misery for the many. Heart replaced by mechanical pump and blood by hydraulic fluid.
- Rick Santorum: Monstrous bigot and one of the stupidest fucking people alive.
- Mitt Romney: do-nothing flip-flopping gover of MA. Possesses excellent hair & teeth.
- Jeb Bush: the meaner, smarter, more corrupt, more craven older brother
- Condoleeza Rice: the living embodiment of the Peter Principle
- Brundlefly: half-man. half-fly, given to fits of homicidal rage
- Cthulu: amoral being asleep under the South Pacific with a 'fearsome and unnatural malignancy.'

[MN ChimpH8R]

1. Just picking a nit, but it's "Cthulhu"

Maybe the Idiot God Azathoth, described by Lovecraft as "that last amorphous blight of nethermost confusion which blasphemies and bubbles at the center of all infinity—the boundless daemon sultan Azathoth, whose name no lips dare speak aloud, and who gnaws hungrily in inconceivable, unlighted chambers beyond time amidst the muffled, maddening beating of vile drums and the thin monotonous whine of accursed flutes." Wait a minute, that's DicKKK Cheney.

[BlueIris]

2. I get that this is kind of a joke poll, but: Santorum.

We could take him even with out weakest candidate and he or she owould undoubtedly SHRED him. That would be fun.

[Initech]

3. I've got to go with the Chultlu on this one.

Definately seems like the perfect fit for the rethugs.

[jane_pippin]

4. I'm going with Rick because I think it would be funny

to watch him self destruct on the campaign trail. No, not funny.
HI-larious.
Plus, I think we could use a landslide, don't you?

[StraightMaleNurse]

5. This is all conjecture, of course, based on whether or not

Voldemort's human form is complete by then.

Whether or not the Emperor can convince Anakin that he the only one who can save Amidala.

Whether or not Mason Verger is able to carry out his horrifying revenge.

Whether or not Rorshaach can deduce who killed the Comedian.

Take your pick.