Demeter
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Tue Sep-13-05 07:09 PM
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Just Read My False Love's Obituary |
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I loved this man as no other, yet he was too young and cocky to see the advantages to a life together. We had conceived, you see, and when he was adamant that he wanted no part of parenthood, I terminated the pregnancy with his knowledge and implied consent. Then he went off and married someone else. I was one of many played by this guy, but I had hoped that self-interest might lead him to marriage and stability.
He had a life-threatening illness, and I had money. I could have provided support, resources, etc. I did so before, getting him into college and a field that he excelled in. Instead, he ran like blazes, married someone else, fathered a child, and died at the age of 32.
I grieved for 11 years for this man, and now it is completely over. There's no false hope, no fairytale ending. I had 18 months of truly loving someone, and perhaps even a few of being truly loved, before the reality of life scared off one too young.
Rest in peace, mi amor.
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LeftyMom
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Tue Sep-13-05 07:24 PM
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That must be awful. :hugs:
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Demeter
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Tue Sep-13-05 07:37 PM
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I moved away, broke all ties with mutual acquaintances, it was too painful and humiliating, and there was nothing left there for me. I could catch a glimpse on the web into a life I couldn't share. Now perhaps healing begins. I have been afraid of putting my heart out there again, fear of another heart blow, and of jinxing a possible reconciliation.
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LeftyMom
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Tue Sep-13-05 07:47 PM
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3. I kinda had a similar relationship where I was ready and he wasn't |
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He turned out to be too immature to be an equal partner in a relationship. That doesn't mean I don't miss him sometimes, even though the relationship that got ugly and violent near it's end.
I made what could have been a very stupid mistake and jumped into another relationship in a matter of hours. Oddly enough, this one worked. Why, I have no idea. :shrug: Life is strange sometimes.
I may find myself in your place in a few years, my ex (yep, I married him) is drinking himself to death last I heard and it wouldn't surprise me if he graduates to something nastier, probably to impress somebody. I think I would have had a harder time with that if things hadn't ended the way they did, in a way the abuse at the end is a gift, it keeps me from idealizing who he was or what our relationship was like.
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DU
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Thu May 09th 2024, 11:25 AM
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