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Mass_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:45 PM
Original message
Relationship/Dating question
Edited on Sun Sep-18-05 05:46 PM by Mass_Liberal
How long do you have to wait after a woman has had a breakup for you to ask her out without being sleazy? I have feelings for this girl, and get the feeling that a breakup for her might be imminent (her relationship has just become really, reeeallly long distance).

Note: this question sounds sleazier than it really is.
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:46 PM
Response to Original message
1. Pounce as soon as you can....
The weekness will be exposed....

Take advantage....

No, just wait a little while....

But don't hang around too much or she might think you are "Freinds"
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Mass_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:47 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. uh?
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:51 PM
Response to Reply #1
7. I was trying to be a caveman....
Guess it didn't translate...

Just be cool....

Don't insert yourself too much or she will think of you as a freind...
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johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:47 PM
Response to Original message
3. In my experience
Guys don't give a shit if the woman is in a relationship, go for it now. :(
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Mass_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:49 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. well
I give a shit.
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johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:52 PM
Response to Reply #4
9. Good for you
That is a lot more respectable than I have dealt with.
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:50 PM
Response to Original message
5. The time it takes to grieve a relationship differs for everyone
and truly, the fact that her SO has moved in no way implies that they aren't still deeply involved with one another.

Just be as aware as possible of what the situation might really be, and if the time seems right to put yourself forward, then by all means do.
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Mass_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:52 PM
Response to Reply #5
8. well
he's moved across the atlantic for several years, and she isn't following. Then again, they are having a fairly serious relationship at the moment.
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petronius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:51 PM
Response to Original message
6. For me, it's always been a week longer than the other guy
so don't wait - ask, and she'll tell you if she wants more time.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
10. after my ex-wife filed for divorce...
I was dating within a week (and more than 1 woman)... but, it did take me a little while before I actually got a B/J and then actually had sex. Probably another few weeks for the bj and another few weeks for sex.

But, things has been going downhill in our marriage within a few weeks of us saying "I do" and this was another almost year before the actual filing of divorce.

So, it was actually kind of freeing. Well, not kind of, it really was freeing. I dated more in the next 18 months than I did in the previous 18 years!!

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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 05:58 PM
Response to Original message
11. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
Mass_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 06:05 PM
Response to Original message
12. anyone else
want to venture their opinion in the public arena?
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 06:08 PM
Response to Original message
13. Just be honest
about your intentions. You don't have to be sleazy or petty about it.

If there is something going on there still, she'll let you know. If not, have a nice time.
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jmm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-18-05 06:35 PM
Response to Original message
14. It may be long distance but how do you know it is ending?
Sometimes those relationship actually work. I was in one once, albeit not quit as distant or for as long as them, and if anything that made us stay together longer.
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