For my fellow cowboy haters - ALBERTA SUCKS AND

[HEyHEY]

YOU'RE NOT REAL COWBOYS!

Here's a song I hate

Sign said 40 miles to Canada

My truck tore across Montana
Ian Tyson sang a lonesome lullaby
And so I cranked up the radio
Cause there's just a little more to go
For I'd cross the border at that Sweet Grass sign
I'm Alberta Bound

This piece of heaven that I've found
Rocky Mountains and black fertile ground
Everything I need beneath that big blue sky
Doesn't matter where I go
This place will always be my home
Yeah I've been Alberta Bound for all my life
And I'll be Alberta Bound until I die

It's a pride that's been passed down to me
Deep as coal mines, wide as farmer's fields
Yeah, I've got independence in my veins
Maybe it's my down-home redneck roots

Or these dusty 'ol Alberta boots
But like a Chinook wind keeps coming back again

Written by this tool



Look at this soft little shit, raised in Calgary I bet, probably never even ridden a horse. I wanna punch him in the stomach and give him a healthy bitch out for thinking alberta is cool

[C_eh_N_eh_D_eh]

1. Paul Brandt is a hack.

He had a couple of good songs, including a decent remix of Convoy, but mostly he's just in love with the sound of his own voice.

[AVulgarianHue]

9. His "What's Come Over You" video..

was gorgeous, at the time I thought he was gorgeous..
then
I saw another video where he is playing in a club and the women are enraptured or swooning.
I thought, keeriist, Brandt, what's come over you?...get over yourself!

[BikeWriter]

2. "Don't call them a cowboy, until you've seen them ride."

I'm a firm believer in that saying.

[tuvor]

3. I'm originally from Alberta.

Never knew anyone who wore a cowboy hat.

I thought I had at least a *tiny* bit of cool in me.

I guess not.

Better tell k.d. lang.

:cry:

[Aristus]

4. The whole "I am a cowboy, 'cause o' these here boots 'n' this

hat" thing just slays me. I'd love to counter that particular delusion with one I made up:

"I'm an astronaut!"

"Really? Have you flown in outer space?"

"Uh...no."

"Do you work for NASA, or the International Space Agency?"

"Uh...no."

"Do you have advanced degrees in orbital mechanics or astronautical engineering?"

"Um....nope."

"Then what makes you think you're an astronaut?"

"Um...I got this cool helmet, see? And these nifty blue coveralls. That makes me an astronaut!"

"...right..."

Same goes for daydream cowboys. A hat and boots don't make you a cowboy! You're not a cowboy unless you ride a horse and rope cattle for a living!

[tuvor]

5. Yeah, but...

...what if you clear brush on your "ranch" during one of your month-long vacations?

[Aristus]

6. No, that makes you the pResident.

n/t

[BikeWriter]

7. Considering "his" prop cows are leased from a neighbor...

he's not qualified.

[JVS]

8. I didn't know that KD Lang moonlighted as a country singer!

[ironflange]

10. That song really really sucks

You know I live in Alberta, but that doesn't mean I have to hang out with rednecks if I don't want to.

BTW, the other "Alberta Bound," by Gordon Lightfoot, is an all-time great.

[tjdee]

11. I'm so very glad I've never heard that song.

:scared:

[swag]

12. Alberta and Saskatchewan will be nothing but rusty pumpjacks glistening

in steaming oily brownfields a few short years from now. Enjoy kicking the shitkickers while you can, my urbane friend.