Is it normal for me (21) to be attracted to women in their 30's?

[DerekG]

Disclaimer: This is about my perception of beauty, I am not having any kind of affair with an older woman a la "The Graduate".

Ever since I was 12, I have been enamored with women who were in their late 20's, 30's and even in early 40's. The girls who were in my own age group did absolutely nothing for me.

The thing is: nothing has changed now that I'm 21. I find the women I come across in my daily routine to be far more appealing than the girls who walk around campus. When I look at magazine covers, it is women like Nicole Kidman, Jamie Lee Curtis, Julianne Moore and Laura Harring (from Lynch's Mulholland Dr.) who catch my eye.

There was only one girl my age I fell head over heels for. She was intelligent, witty and compassionate. I was about to profess my love to her when I found out that she was engaged. She was the only one.

I'm asking male DUers if this is a quirk found among certain people, or if there could be something abnormal about this attraction?

P.S. Nothing lewd, please.

[pmbryant]

1. Yes (n/t)

[7th_Sephiroth]

40. yeah, its totally normal

i actually dated a 35 year old mother of 4 last year

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

2. Sure it's normal!

I really think people's attractions are what they are unless they venture into the fetish area where they can border on obsessive or unhealthy.

Is it just the physical attraction or do you also better enjoy the company of a woman a decade older than you?

(not that I'm asking for any reason..:D)

[DerekG]

14. It's really both...

I think there is something sublimely lovely about a woman who radiates intelligence and world-experience (such as actress Jessica Lange). I also have had many immersive, meaningful conversations with older women, whereas with younger girls, it seems that the dialogue is an interim until she can get into another round of cell-phone chatter or partying.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

17. Good for you!

Keep on enjoying your life and the women you choose to be with in the manner you choose to be with. :D

[AquariDem]

3. I am the exact same way

I'm not male, but I just thought I'd post here anyway. I've always had crushes on women who were older than me, and I'm also 21. I never even looked at any of the other girls when I was in junior high, because--let's face it--they were pretty mean and shallow. So no, you are not the only one.

[Padraig18]

4. May-December romance...

... is much more common than we like to acknowledge. You're perfectly normal. :hi:

[caledesi]

42. Absolutely. My husband is 5 years younger than me and we are

doing fine! We have been together 11 years.

[lefty_mcduff]

5. Absolutely.

I have always been a fan of older women.

[Forkboy]

6. I'm attracted to "older" women as well

for many reasons,chief among them they are smarter than your average bear and don't get worked up over things like a toothpaste cap not being put back on.They have their priorities in better order.*

*disclaimer-these are general statements and will not apply to all mature or younger women.

I have other reasons but you asked not to get lewd :)

I dont think it's abnormal....but I could definately be the wrong person to judge normality (he says placing his Pig Destroyer CD in the stereo).

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

7. BTW..now that I am headed toward "older woman" status (being 45)

I really DO like reading this thread :D

[WeirdSceneGoldmine]

44. With age comes wisdom

I'll take wisdom any day over shallow physical temporary youth and arrogance.

[Terwilliger]

8. if you're truly evolved

women from 17 to 90 are attractive

[Maple]

9. Yes, quite normal

You like 'women' as opposed to 'girls'

[TennesseeWalker]

10. Without a shadow of a doubt.

Older women have got it going on! :) I like the intellectual stimulation as much as the other kind, too. :) Enjoy!

[izzie]

11. Gee but Ido not know. But....

I went back to college in my late 30's and would get passes all the time. I was sort of a young looking women as I had to show my ID into my 30's to get a drink but I figured it was young men just like friendly women who could talk to them. They were really lots of fun and I would go to lunch with then and just generally hang out. Oh I was in an art sachool and art students are pretty crazy and free thinking, so it may have been that.Or maybe not as I had a friend just my age and she was in the same place with men but in the eng. school.We were both very open minded people.Our kids are still kidding us where we used to take them.

[Frangible]

12. Hmm, yes

I'm 24 and I do find somewhat older women to in general be more attractive than somewhat younger women... as long as they're cute, it's all secondary to their intellect and personality though for me.

[It was not a pretzel]

13. sure

n/t

I'm attracted to both older and younger women.

[arcane1]

15. hell yes it's normal!

the 30's RULE!!! :loveya:

[mlawson]

16. Who can say, what is 'normal'???

It's your business, don't worry about it.

[Darth_Kitten]

18. Bless you Child....

:D ;) :evilgrin:

[Amaya]

19. Sure it is

I was recently asked out by a 21 year old. I'm 31.. Needless to say I said no, but that a whole other story. I was flattered though.

[pmbryant]

23. 'Needless to say'?

Thankfully the woman I am with did not give me the same answer when I was 21 and she was 30.

:-)

--Peter

[SOteric]

45. Amaya has a sweetie on these boards.

I don't think she declined her young suitor just because he was young.

[Hell Hath No Fury]

37. When I was 29...

I dated a 19 year old. One of the more wonderful dating experiences I ever had. Unfortuntaley, he went off to college in Oregon.

[populistmom]

20. We all have preferences. It's okay.

I've always been attracted to men who were a little older than me. That's never been an issue in society. Why should it be for the reverse?

(And us 30-somethings get very flattered when those cute, young guys like us too, even those of us who do like older men.)

[Suspicious]

21. I don't see how it would be considered abnormal...

and I don't know about anyone else, but this thread has done wonders for my faltering self-confidence...I have been ready to go into hiding over the fact that my 35th is rapidly approaching (then comes the guilt over being so shallow)...

Thanks! :)

[KaraokeKarlton]

30. I don't get "older"...

I get BETTER! ;)

[pansypoo53219]

22. my uncle had a long relationship

with an older woman.WITH 2 KIDS no less, for years. and is now married to a woman 5 years older.
My grandparents don't count. granma was only 5 months older.

[Kamika]

24. No it's not normal at all

Normal (as in what everyone else does) is that you like girls your own age.

This is a fetish

[absyntheNsugar]

27. I assume you are joking

Because otherwise that statement is just plain mean.

[Kamika]

33. how?

Just how is it mean? I'm just totally honest.

It's not like I'm saying it's bad or anything.

[absyntheNsugar]

38. Well...

Saying someone's preference is not normal is a judgement statement. Let's just say I were to say "Whites dating Blacks is not normal." That statement would, besides being racist, also be predjudiced.

[WeirdSceneGoldmine]

25. It's not only normal it's appreciated

Many thirty some+ women have a strong desire to hang with youthful males. I was fortunate enough at 18 to be enamoured by such a fate.
Aside from being raised by sisters only it was yet another twist of fate that helped me get through the troubled years without the burden of having to be the peter of the pact.

[Runesong]

26. Perfectly understandable.

Psychologically, you may be attracted to them because they are older, strong, and more self-confident. They are secure, and they know what they want. They promise an adventure and learning.

Having children often changes a woman's body in very very appealing ways. Fuller hips and breasts, a nice belly. Basically the kind of body seen in classical paintings. Beautiful.

I have been married for 13 years, and watched my 21 year old bride blossom into the absolutely stunning 34 year old GODDESS she is today.

I understand perfectly. :)

[KaraokeKarlton]

28. Well, I am an almost 38 year old woman

My last boyfriend was over 10 years younger than I am. In fact, I find that I am more often approached and pursued by men who are much younger than I am. In fact, a 20 year old I work with is constantly hitting on me.

So, it's a lot more common and normal than you are thinking. I prefer the younger guys, too, so I'm all for it, lol.

[absyntheNsugar]

29. Hey I'm 32 and I know what you mean

30-something women are at their peak. Pretty much in every way. Theyre daring enough to try something new, smart enough to stay away from something stupid, utterly beautiful, and they KNOW WHAT THEY WANT!

Trust me, the best thing you can find in a partner is someone who knows what they want.

Oh, and women in their 30's can acheive athletic perfection as well. Notice most fitness competitors are in their 30's?

[Kahuna]

31. Yes! Women are gorgeous at 30.

I know I was. :eyes:

[KCDem]

32. I hope so!

I'm a 32-y-old woman, and I often find younger men checking me out. I imagine being the subject of "Stacey's Mom", lol. :evilgrin:

[NightTrain]

34. When I was 21, I was attracted to women in their mid to late 40s

Not exclusively, y'understand, but a woman who looks good is a woman who looks good, her age be damned!

[Sting]

35. i'm 21...

and i'm attracted to women who are in their 40s! such as, heather locklear and the like

[Hell Hath No Fury]

36. Perfectly normal...

I know many younger men who feel as you do -- heck, I've dated them!

I have tended to date guys anywhere from 5-10 years younger than myself. From what my men have told me, they appreciate a woman who is a little more comfortable with guys in general.

Hey, if you're happy and she's happy, it's ALL good. :)

[BiggJawn]

39. I was with a 38-y-o when I was 22...

and a 29-y-o, a 36-y-o, in fact, I have only been with 2 younger women in my whole life.

I think you're normal and healthy and you should try an affair with an older woman. They're WONDERFUL!

[DerekG]

41. Wow...

The feedback is much more positive than I expected it to be.

Thanks, all!!

[SOteric]

43. A Frenchman of my acquaintance always used to say,

"A woman doesn't even begin to get interesting until 30 years of age."

I vote 'normal.'

[hertopos]

46. My husband is 16 years younger...

I am always attracted to younger men rather than men at my age or older. Typically, men at my age are too boring or too sexist for me.

I do look awefully young. When I met my husband for the first time, he was worried if I were too young for him

Hertopos

[4323Lopez]

47. Yes, in fact its very fashionable right now