Who else here sucks with money?

[Darth_Kitten]

I do, for sure. I'm just going in circles every month trying to pay down my credit cards, so may see this financial trustee(?) a friend recommended to me.

There, I said it. :) The great taboo: talking about money. :(
I need to find another solution for my financially stressful life. :)

I think it's about time. :)

[HEyHEY]

1. Yo!

[Graf Orlok]

2. I do.

[tjdee]

3. I *was*, and it's coming back to bite me...

Just in terms of worry, etc. I worry I'm going to get sued for my credit cards (they've gone into collection, etc., one calls me every single day sometimes twice a day)... I was told by a lawyer not to do bankruptcy because my debt isn't high enough that it would be worth it. I was like, uhhh.... six grand is quite high enough thanks!

I'm trying to get into a credit counseling thing, but I've had some minor problems getting it started.

What is this trustee thing?

[Darth_Kitten]

4. My friend actually filed for bankruptcy....

I don't want to do that, I've got a steady job and income, but this person she recommended to me can help apparently. Maybe I can negotiate something with my creditors. :)

I'm in Canada, so I'm sure the rules/laws are different in the States.

[fujiyama]

38. Ummm $6,000?

And you want to file?

I have to agree with the lawyer. It's not worth it. Trust me. Bankruptcy isn't the easy way out (for individuals at least) that repukes may claim. It should only be used in the worst of circumstances.

BTW, did you consider debt consolidation instead? I'm not too familar with it, but that may be better. Good luck.

[tjdee]

41. I figured my credit is in the toilet anyway...that's why I wanted to file.

And I want to avoid being taken to court by the cc companies. (I guess in bankruptcy I have to go to court too, but...) I am trying debt consolidation/credit counseling, but I won't know for a few weeks, probably a month, whether my creditors will agree to that.

Thank you for your post, I was wondering if that attorney was kooky nuts to talk me out of bankruptcy. Of course, he was also telling me that his fee would be about $1000...for that much I could pay off one of my ccs.

[Nikia]

43. Don't do it

The credit card companies will settle for less. I am not sure how or why, but we were able to pay off 2 of our credit cards that way. You could end up having to only pay 30-50% of that. They might even accept that in payments with no further interest. The credit card companies would rather be paid something than nothing (if you filed bankrupcy).
Don't freak out about them calling all the time. That doesn't mean that they are taking you to court soon. It is an intimidation technique.

[tjdee]

46. But aren't the bankruptcy laws changing?

So I'd have to pay them something even if I filed? (Okay, but I'm not filing, just curious.)

I have a couple cc in collections--I'm not worried about the one that calls me every single day :eyes: but the higher ones don't have my number because I've moved. To get into the debt consolidation/credit counseling I have to track them down...and they're going to want a number so they can call me all the time, and/or an address so they can serve me... :scared:

I am very good at worrying. I think I could win an award in it.
Anyway, why didn't you do debt consolidation/credit counseling? I'm a bit wary of giving someone *else* money, but it seems on the up and up so far--and the collection agency that calls every day won't take less than huge chunks (like, paying the entire balance right now).

[Nikia]

47. Well

The credit card companies sort of made offers on their own which turned out to be a relief.
With collection agencies, tell them that you cannot pay the whole amount but that you will send a certain amount by a certain day and that you will pay a certain amount every month. I believe that they cannot take action against you as long as you do that. Just be sure to make those payments on time.
If you want to go with credit counseling/debt consolidation, you probably will have less to worry about especially if you have several cards as opposed to 1 or 2. If you do this, the people helping you should be contacting the companies and telling them that you are working on making payments. They should not be taking you to court.
Once you pay off bills in collections, you will have better credit, much better than if you file bankrupcy.

[Nikia]

5. Yes, especially since I've gotten married

When I was in college, my major bill was tuition. I made sure that I had enough for that. I pretty much paid cash for everything else. If I didn't have cash, I didn't buy. I never used the ATM. I got a certain amount out of the bank at each check, more if I had to buy text books or something specific.
Now I have many bills all due at different times. I usually write checks for things like groceries and gas. My husband uses our debit card all the time. He also gets money out of the ATM. He used to take care of all the bills and stuff. Since he has gotten depressed though, he often neglects them. To make things worse, we run a slight defecit. I never know how much money we have at any given time.
When we took the marriage compatibility test, given by the pastor who was marrying us before getting married, we scored 0% on the financial section. Hmm.

[SeattleGirl]

25. So you have joint accounts?

I refused to do it, because my parents were always having trouble with it. Mom was responsible but dad wasn't. Hubby and I both have our weakensses, and have been been in trouble in the past. We have a system where he gives me a check twice a month for his part of the household bills, and I pay them from my account. Individual bills (credit cards, etc.) are the responsibility of the person who's account it is. Not that we don't help each other out, or anything, but I just could not get on board with the joint account thing.

Maybe you could talk to him about you taking over paying bills for right now, especially if he is depressed, to keep you from sliding into a big hole.

Yeah, money stuff sucks!

[Nikia]

27. Yes

We have joint accounts. It might be better to have individual accounts but I think that could lead to problems too.

[SeattleGirl]

30. It probably could.

I originally did not want joint accounts partly because like I said, I saw the problems it created with my mom and dad, but also because I had just finished paying off $20,000 in debt (mostly school loans), and my husband had debt of his own. I did not want to be legally tied in any way, shape or form to that. Not that I did not help out, but I did not want his debtors to be able to come after me -- one of us had to have a clean income. Anyway, he ended up filing Chapter 13 (he had to pay off all his bills, but did it through the arrangements of an attorney), paid everything off, and felt better for it. So we have a kind of dependent/independent relationship with our money issues.

Anyway, I hope things start turning around for you. When I was working at paying off my debts, I found a book that really helped me out: How to Get Out of Debt, Stay Out of Debt, and Live Prosperously. Sorry, cannot recall the author's name, but your local bookstore may carry it or be able to get it for you. Very down to earth and practical, and it gave me enough info to allow me to pay off that $20,000 in 2 years (and not starve in the process).

[latebloomer]

6. You are right about the great taboo!

Most people would rather tell you about their sex life than their finances.

[Darth_Kitten]

9. I just thought I would share...

it's like once you open up about things it's amazing how many other people are in the same kind of situation.

Plus, I wouldn't want to bore anyone with my ((cough cough))) sex life. ;)

[AlienGirl]

11. It's a taboo because it's how our society values people

Since we are valued in terms of our financial worth, and none of us ever feels like we can have enough, it is frightening to talk about--like revealing our soft underbellies to each other.

Tucker

[latebloomer]

12. Interesting observation

I also know some fairly conscious people who have a lot of money-- and they seem to be almost embarrassed about it. i often wonder where they got their money, but I'm afraid to ask.

[AlienGirl]

14. They are embarrassed because it makes them seem more powerful

than their friends. If you're an Alpha, but you hang around mostly with Betas or lower-ranking pack-members, you don't want to intimidate them with your status.

Tucker

[latebloomer]

20. Yes, and they are democratic-minded people

For instance, the woman is involved in anti-racist causes, and she is very concerned about not seeming like Lady Bountiful, where she is looking down on poor people, giving to them from a higher rung-- she recently approached me about a group of us "adopting" some homeless New Orleans families-- but not just giving them money or discards-- getting to know them on a personal, emotional level.

Frankly, I am too busy trying to make a living and ekeing out a bit of time for self and family to have the energy for something like that. But more power to her.

[SeattleGirl]

26. Tucker, you are so right!

During the dotcom boom, when 19 year olds (and others) were buying big houses, and anything else they could, and it seemed so many people had so much money, I told my husband if this kept going, they were probably going to kick all the not-filthy-rich people (like me) out, put a fence around Seattle, and only let millionaires in!

It's really too bad that our society seems to think the value of a person lies in the value of their bank account.

[anarch]

7. Don't know...I've never had enough of it to find out!

So I guess that would be a 'yes'.

[Guaranteed]

8. I actually feel like I'm good with money.

But, at the moment my fiancee is earning all of it, and she also has this tendency to come home with a $200 purchase just about every week.

I keep giving in to her. Eventually, I'm going to have to put my foot down, though.

[Deja Q]

10. I do too.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

13. me

[TallahasseeGrannie]

15. I sucked with money

until I started making enough of it. Now I semi suck.

It also got better when I bought a house because when I get really broke I can use the equity rather than credit cards.

I am not a very disciplined person. I don't have any easy answers for you, but there are some good books out there. One of them suggests NOT paying OFF credit cards. I suggests just paying the minimum, even though you will never catch up. It says that it keeps you from getting into even worse debt and it keeps youf credit good for house buying. Then after a few years you can refinance and pay the credit cards off with the proceeds.

[tjdee]

42. I was reading that too, to not pay off the credit cards.

Lots of conflicting info....it made sense too, the way the guy laid it out... :shrug:

[youthere]

16. I did..and I'm still not great...

but I've gotten a LOT better.

[flvegan]

17. The copycat thread is just begging...begging to be set forth...

Who else here sucks for money?

There, I said it. It's all about prepositions.

[anarch]

21. haha...or "propositions", as the case may be... n/t

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

24. Darn ye you beat me!!!!!

[TK421]

18. I'm awful with money....I'm constantly getting my account balance

because I can't keep up with all the recording of shit in my checkbook ( actually fell below with a negative balance a couple of times )

[Yavin4]

19. Here's What You Need To Start Doing

Keep a record of every penny that you spend. Track your withdrawls, your purchases, and your credit card expenditures. By laying out your spending in front of you, you will be surpried at the kind of crap that you spend money on.

I started doing this in 2000 when I was a temp, and I learned that I was spending way too much money on eating meals outside of the home. Thus, I started taking my lunch to work and cooking more meals at home. That shaved almost $250 a month off of my monthly expenditures.

Now, I track every penny that I spend through a database that I built for myself. I'm on my way to financial independence because of it. I can go 6 months without work, and I would be able to keep pace with all of my bills.

[kitten29]

45. see you got it !!!

manage your cash flow and question your expenditures... it's actually not that hard... :applause:

[Yavin4]

48. It Was An Eye-Opening Experience

Most people would be really surprised at how much money they waste on crap.

[Mizmoon]

22. I'm actually pretty good since online banking

I get paid by direct deposit
I pay the bills the same day I get paid
Live off of what remains be it hundreds or tens

Before online banking I was inept at managing my money.

[Lars39]

23. A *very* good site I recommend(it's subscription, but worth it):

And something that escaped me for years: You have to put money away for
emergencies and routine expenses in addition to paying down your debt.
Throwing everything you've got at debt leaves you with no reserves for emergencies
or for those pesky once-or-twice a year expenses like tires or whatever.
It may take a little longer to pay off the debt,
but at least you've stopped digging the hole deeper.

http://www.cheapskatemonthly.com//member_tools_rdrpdemo.asp

[WCGreen]

28. All that is behind me now....

I took control of what I bought, how I paid for it, and got rid of all my credit cards except the one in the drawer in case of emergency

[New Earth]

29. me

:( i spend way too much on shit i don't need to buy. i order out a lot, stop at WaWa for food instead of cooking.....

and i spend a lot of money on traveling to see bands :blush:

i try to keep up with the bills i have, i do ok, but i could do better :(

[driver8]

31. Go see a financial advisor. My wife and I went to one a few years

ago and the results have been amazing. Our guy went over our income/debt/obligations with a fine toothed comb and set up a plan that is really working for us. I was horrible at saving money, but now it is done for me. The money goes into a brokerage account, IRAs, and our life insurance automatically -- we never have to think about it and have adjusted our budget based on this.

I definitely recommend getting help from someone.

[Wapsie B]

32. Sounds good.

Where did you find yours? The guidance is what I'm needing.

[driver8]

33. We found our guy where we had our taxes done...

I work at Warner Bros. studios in Burbank and half the people I work with get their taxes done by the same firm. Our taxes were getting complicated so my wife and I decided to have them done. They offered a free consultation with one of their financial advisors and we really liked him. He is a "no bullshit" kind of guy which is what I needed.

Talk to some friends...maybe check out a couple in the phone book...see if you can get a free consultation. You can get a pretty good feel about how someone is going to handle your money from a first meeting.

Good luck!!

[Wapsie B]

34. Thanks for the info.

I just need someone who works for themself and not some insurance agent masquerading as a financial advisor twisting my arm to buy his products.

[driver8]

36. Exactly!! That is how I felt.

We did purchase life insurance, but I have asked a couple of my college friends who are in the financial biz and they told me what I bought was smart. Also, I am not a risk taker when it comes to money and our advisor takes that into consideration when investing our money.

I have another friend who goes to our guy and he told him, "Bob, I don't want to have to think about this shit...it drives me crazy. Take care of my money, would you?"

I don't know if I could do that but my friend is happy with the results!

[CanuckAmok]

35. Me.

I'm 38. I really need to grow-up, financially.

[gulfcoastliberal]

37. I finally got my GF to to file a Chap 7 before it's too late

She got laid off and had to have emergency surgery, but also had a lot of dumb CC charges like maxed out; victoria secret, other CCs, etc. I added it all up off her credit reports and I think it was around 30K. So she's filed and got a good bankruptcy attorney.

That said, I suck with money too, but it's cuz I'm unemployed and have a lot of family things going on preventing me from working which puts me in the awkward situation of bumming money off the 'rents. But they know the deal and help.

I have a Bachelor degree but I plan to go into a trade that pays well. Just wish I went into this trade right after HS or at least after college. It's a job that can't be outsourced, tons of baby boomers in it are retiring and not enough younger folks going into it, and it's a service people always need and always need maintaining. It's dangerous if you're not careful but I'm anal about doing a job as perfectly as I possibly can.

[patricia92243]

39. I have ALL my expenses taken out of my account automatically.

Everything from electric bill to insurance on house. Somehow by the money NOT going through my hands, the bills get paid and I am FORCED to live on what is left. Works like a charm for me.

[Wcross]

40. I am excellent with my finances.

My advice to you Darth_Kitten is to cut the cards up. If you can not cut them all up, save one and put it in a bowl of water. Place it in your freezer. You will have a long time waiting for it to thaw out to reconsider your purchase.
Paying off the cards is easy if you do not continue to add to the balance.
It sounds as if your income does not match your out-go. The solution is to decrease your expenses or increase your income.

Check this guy out. He is a fundy conservative but he does have some great ideas and plans to get out of debt. (desperation makes for strange bedfellows)
http://www.daveramsey.com/

[kitten29]

44. it's all about cash flow & ego

do you really need all that which results in your current financial situation... i believe and have seen so many folks get trapped just to feed their ego's... saving $$$ is easy, living with your wants and desires is another story... personally i don't care what people think, buy what i need and invest the rest... i'm very comfortable with me...

every time ya take out your wallet ask yourself do i really need it, also i recommend ya kill the credit cards and go on a cash basis till you have a handle on your $$$$ situation...

[Yavin4]

49. It's The Every Day Spending That Really Trips People Up

People get into spending habits, and they spend money without even knowing it. For me, I use to eat all of my meals out because my schedule was really busy, but I found that if I brought my lunch and ate dinner at home, then I didn't have to work additional overtime hours.

[Darth_Kitten]

51. Great point!

:)

[kitten29]

53. absolutely

this was one thing my father advised me on early in my life, brown bag it and bank the $$$... this one little piece of advice results in quite a savings over the course of a year... not to mention that ya'll be eating better food anyway... with the advent of the microwave ovens, the possibilities of brown bag menu's is infinite...

[entanglement]

50. I read 'who else here sucks FOR money'

and wondered why that made your life financially stressful

:evilgrin:

:hide: :hide:

[renate]

52. you can probably find a good class at a community college

One of the best classes I ever took in college was something like Personal Finances 101.

Since you get 12-24 hours of information in small chunks, it's a great and cost-effective way to get a financial education. Much better than $100-300 an hour from a financial planner (which might be worth it for people with complicated financial situations but not necessarily for most of us).

[Jamastiene]

54. I use a straw. Don't want my money to get sticky from the soft drink.

I couldn't resist. I had to say that. :evilgrin: