Hate to be a downer, but I want to know: is man rape funny?

[Dora]

Seriously. I just don't get it. In a thread elsewhere about DeLay's new conspiracy and money laundering charges I read a post outlining DeLay's future jailhouse-rape prospects, and it was quite graphic if brief. Obviously, the poster was trying to be amusing. But I see/hear man-rape jokes all the time.

Am I the only one who thinks this is a wee bit fucked up?

You know, I've heard some women say some strange shit over the years, but I've never heard a woman joke about raping somebody else, or joke about the potential for rape. Why do men think this is okay? Is this okay for men? Do I just not understand the context?

I don't get it. Somebody please explain.

[mac56]

1. Short answer: no, it's not funny.

Somewhat longer answer: sometimes people joke about things that they themselves have "issues" about. Sort of keeping their demons at bay.

Add on edit: not presented as an excuse or justification, only a possible explanation.

[Dora]

9. I'd considered that.

But I wonder if it's really keeping them at bay or inviting them a little closer in.

[mac56]

10. either way: seeking some resolution

don't you think?

[Elidor]

2. It's funny in a figurative, abstract sense

It wouldn't be funny if were literally true.

But I wouldn't cry over it, either. He's fucked enough other people, figuratively speaking, that a bit of asshole karma is in order.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

3. no not funny

all rape is terrifying

not something i would even wish on delay

[Fenris]

4. No. No it is not.

[skoppa]

5. It depends on who you are talking about.

[ismnotwasm]

6. No nt

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

7. No I hate that kind of humor. It's as if it's an accepted idea in America

that if you go to jail, part of your "understood" punishment is to be raped.

[asthmaticeog]

8. I have no answer - and I've always wondered myself

why male-on-male prison rape is such a reflexive punchline ("don't drop the soap, hardee har har") with so many people who - quite rightly - wouldn't dream of joking about a woman being raped. It's a double-standard, certainly.

[Dora]

16. Get this:

This past summer, my husband and I visited his parents. My father-in-law gave us the update on the latest travails of a struggling grandson, X.

X isn't a bad kid, by any stretch of the imagination, but he's had some brushes with the law related to drug/alcohol charges (no criminal charges). At the time, X was just turning 18, and my FIL began telling us about the lecture he gave to X about his behavior, "gotta shape up," yadda yadda, and then began to warn him about not getting arrested again because otherwise he was going to the Big House, and then he proceeds to joke/warn/threaten about the likelihood of somebody "taking care of" X in prison!

I immediately spoke up, and said "could we please find something to talk about besides man rape?" - and the conversation was nipped in the bud, quite silently to my pleasure.

But, my god! My FIL likes to pride himself on what a civilized and erudite and self-made renaissance man he is, and he threatened his own grandson with the possibility of man rape. It made me cry to hear it.

[asthmaticeog]

21. That's awful. I hope it has a deterrent effect, but *still,* WAY weak. n/t

[ghostsofgiants]

11. No, it's not...

In the context of joking about DeLay (or any other prisoners) getting raped in prison, not exactly humourous to me.

However, my anthropology professor used it in a sort of ironic way to put an arrogant student in his place a few weeks back. He was talking about how, when all is said and done, a career criminal makes the equivalent of someone working for minumum wage, this guy piped up "does that include a room and meals in prison?" in that 'prisoners have it too easy' tone that some people have.

My professor's response:
"I don't know. How much does half a room with a roommate who fucks you in the ass regularly usually cost nowadays, anyway?" in a very sarcastic manner.

I thought that was hilarious, not in the sense that "haha, bad guys getting raped is funny" but in the sense that "haha, the arrogant jackass who probably thinks rape is funny just got put in his place."

Clearly a large difference in context.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

12. in that context..he depicted it as a bad thing

not as a thing he wished upon somebody

[ghostsofgiants]

14. Exactly, so I guess it depends on context...

In the context of wishing it on someone, not funny.

[JanMichael]

13. No. It's not nor has it ever been funny.

I get why people here say that about Delay but it's still not funny.

Beating him senseless with a rubber hose filled with jello would be fun and funny but not rape. That's never funny.

[miss_kitty]

15. No. rape of anyone is not funny

and no one deserves it.
Rape is an act of violence, and laughing about the infliction of rape upon someone is like laughing about someone being beaten with a baseball bat or being shot or knifed.

[catbert836]

17. Arrested Development

Dr. Tobias Funke was an analyst, and a therapist, so he put down on his business cards that he was an "analrapist".
No, don't get me wrong. I don't think it's really funny in the least.

[Dora]

19. That's a play on words, plus it's funny on more than one level.

I can see the defense of this as humor.

But one man joking about another man being made somebody's bitch by a violent assault - I just don't see the humor.

[catbert836]

38. That's what I meant.

n/t

[tigereye]

33. hard to believe any therapist

Freudian or not, would think that that was amusing. :shrug:

[catbert836]

37. No, you misunderstand.

It's a show on FOX ( watch it when you get a chance, its called arrested Development, and it's hilarious) where he is an exceptionally clueless psychiatrist-turned actor. He didn't get at all why he shouldn't put something like that on his business cards.

[tigereye]

43. whoops

guess I need to bone up on my reading comp. skills. ;)

Now it all makes sense. I have kind of given up on TV - except for a few PBS shows and Gilmore girls.

[Democrats_win]

18. It's ok but juvenile i.e. fart jokes. A John Waters film has a song called

"Don't drop the soap (for anyone else but me)" which should scare the heck out of Tom Delay. Maybe we should have a convict send him some flowers.

The fact that our prisons are not humane should be the real concern.

[Dora]

20. Waters is Waters, and he's incorrigible. n/t

[Ptah]

22. Personnally, I find it repugnent.

on edit:
I also find it repugnant, vile, inhumane and
a manner of expression I wish I never encountered.

:thumbsdown: :thumbsdown: :thumbsdown:


:thumbsdown: :thumbsdown: :thumbsdown:


:cry: :cry: :cry:

[CBHagman]

23. Uh, NO.

I've never been able to stomach any sort of jokes about jailhouse rape, and unfortunately even mainstream comedians get away with that sort of callous humor (such as Dennis Miller, back before he drank the Kool-Aid).

[RevCheesehead]

24. Rape is never funny.

[tinfoilinfor2005]

25. Somehow, knowing Delay's personalility, I don't think he would

be the one on the receiving end of the rape. I appreciate and agree with all of your sensitive posts on the subject, but I also agree that rape is a crime of power rather than passion, and Delay is the power bully of the century.

[spacelady]

26. Another thing: prison rape has nothing to do with homosexuality.

It is no less violent than getting stabbed or beaten.

[kanrok]

27. Yes, the short answer is it's not funny

I was a criminal prosecutor for a number of years early in my legal career. I had a conversation with a defense attorney (whom I trust) who told me a terrifying story. Understand that I cannot prove this, and I can provide absolutely no confirmation of this story. Having said that, he told me about an 18 year-old client of his who was sent to prison on a residential burglary. In my state, a conviction for res burg is a mandatory minimum of 4 years, and the people convicted of this crime are almost always sent to a minimum security prison upon conviction. This young man was processed and "mistakenly" sent to a max security prison. He was raped the first day there. I learned, through the defense attorney (again this may be apocryphal) that his client, a slight, good-looking young man, was sent to the max prison to "placate" the gang members there. In my profession, there is a gallows humor that outsiders would consider disgusting. I prosecuted sex offenders who took advantage of minors, and it was customary to joke that these defendants would "get what they deserve" once they got to "diagnostic" at the state prison. I often think of this young man when this issue comes up, and it makes me sick to my stomach that I joked about this way back when.

[swag]

28. No. Thanks for posting. And here's a good group to donate to.

http://www.spr.org

They were instrumental in getting the Prison Rape Elimination Act passed. Signing that act was one of the only good things GWB has done while in office.

[Tallison]

31. Thank you for this link

Tolerating or turning a blind eye to violence among the incarcerated is anathema to the civilization ours puports to be.

[swag]

35. You're welcome.

ACLU National Prison Project is also very good.

You can donate to ACLU and designate to the NPP.

http://www.aclu.org/Prisons/PrisonsMain.cfm

I try to support both ACLU and spr.org when I can.

[NNadir]

29. You have an excellent, cogent, point.

Rape is not acceptable. Not in prison. Not of a man. Not anywhere.

Someone tried to rape me when I was 18. I was a young man and was quite strong enough to fight that person off, but it was terrifying all the same. I could have been killed.

Tom Delay sucks as a human being, and the horrific nature of prisons owes quite a bit to his agency, but I would rather see the consequences of his actions ended than to see him experience what he had caused.

[CanuckAmok]

30. I think men fear it, and that's why "we" joke about it.

Of course man-rape isn't funny. No rape is funny.

But I agree, it's a cultural double-standard.

I was recently talking with someone on DU about this very thing; this progressive site sometimes takes some extremely "Old Testament-esque" turns when issues of crime and punishment arise.

I'm not from the "eye for an eye" school of thought. And I believe prison is ideally to rehabilite, not further dehumanise.

[crispini]

40. Now that has a ring of truth to it.

People often joke about what they fear.

[SeattleGirl]

32. Rape of anyone is not funny

One of the negative consequences of "jokes" about male rape is that it makes it even more difficult for them to report it when it happens, just like when they are victims of other types of physical abuse.

There is more of this that goes on than people realize. It's difficult enough for women to report it; can you imagine how hard it is for men, especially in THIS society?

[henslee]

34. Not funny. Neither is sexual abuse in prison.

Yet, talk shows, commercials and comedians treat it as if its a bunch of yucks. I know someone who got tossed in Rikers for a week and was anally penetrated. It could easily happen to one of the many peace activists who many of us know... a little bad luck, getting lost in the system, etc.

[Wapsie B]

36. Not funny at all.

Sex against someone's wishes is wrong, man or woman.

[Midlodemocrat]

39. Short answer: No, never.

Long answer: Those threads were removed.

[A-Schwarzenegger]

44. And thanks to you mods for that.

Some people needs some educatin' & compassionatin'.

[chaska]

41. One thing we desparately need, and will never get, in the US is...

meaningful prison reform.

I've done some reading on this recently and it is terrifying and heartbreaking. Just incredibly brutal. And those men then get out and continue to rape, mostly women and children. The cycle of violence in this country is mind boggling.

We are a violent warrior society, and we must put an end to it. Men, especially, should check out the books in my profile. They aren't about rape, but how we make a better world by being better men.

Bonus: These books explain a lot as regards the Republican party and politics in general, though that isn't the aim.

[Jara sang]

42. Hetero men who are insecure with their sexuality make jokes like that