I've had five posts in the last 48 hours

[ChickMagic]

and I killed every last thread. I am Queen Threadkiller!!!! Worship me!

[tjwmason]

1. This presents a conundrum

If we all post saying how much we worship you as Queen Threadkiller this thread will stay kicked for ages, which will prevent you from killing it.

[ChickMagic]

2. Oh yeah?

Watch me! :P

[tjwmason]

3. I'm watching.

and I'm guessing that once I post this, the thread will jump to the top of the listing page. :P

[billyskank]

5. A paradox!

Ruth.
When you had left our pirate fold,
We tried to raise our spirits faint,
According to our custom old,
With quip and quibble quaint.
But all in vain the quips we heard,
We lay and sobbed upon the rocks,
Until to somebody occurred
A startling paradox.

Frederic.
A paradox?
Ruth. (laughing)
A most ingenious paradox!
We’ve quips and quibbles heard in flocks,
But none to beat this paradox!

All.
A paradox, a paradox,
A most ingenious paradox.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
This paradox.

King.
We knew your taste for curious quips,
For cranks and contradictions queer;
And with the laughter on our lips,
We wished you there to hear.
We said, "If we could tell it him,
How Frederic would the joke enjoy!"
And so we’ve risked both life and limb
To tell it to our boy.
Frederic. (interested)
A paradox?

King. (laughing)
That most ingenious paradox!
We’ve quips and quibbles heard in flocks,
But none to beat that paradox!

All.
A paradox, a paradox,
A most ingenious paradox.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
That paradox.

CHANT
King.
For some ridiculous reason, to which, however, I’ve no desire to be disloyal,
Some person in authority, I don’t know who, very likely the Astronomer Royal,
Has decided that, although for such a beastly month as February,
twenty-eight days as a rule are plenty,
One year in every four his days shall be reckoned as nine and twenty.
Through some singular coincidence – I shouldn’t be surprised if it were owing to the
agency of an ill-natured fairy –
You are the victim of this clumsy arrangement, having been born in leap-year,
on the twenty-ninth of February;
And so, by a simple arithmetical process, you’ll easily discover,
That though you’ve lived twenty-one years, yet, if we go by birthdays,
you’re only five and a little bit over!

Ruth & King.
Ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha!
Ho! ho! ho! ho!

Frederic.
Dear me!
Let’s see! (counting on fingers)
Yes, yes; with yours my figures do agree!

Ruth & King.
Ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha! ha!

Frederic. (more amused than any)
How quaint the ways of Paradox!
At common sense she gaily mocks!
Though counting in the usual way,
Years twenty-one I’ve been alive.
Yet, reckoning by my natal day,
Yet, reckoning by my natal day,
I am a little boy of five!

Ruth & King.
He is a little boy of five!

All.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
A paradox, a paradox,
A most ingenious paradox.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
A paradox.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
A curious paradox,
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
A most ingenious paradox.

RUTH and KING throw themselves back on seats, exhausted with laughter.

[tjwmason]

6. YAYS the Pirates of Penzance.

Pure and unadulterated nonsense, mixed with ultra trashy music - but 110% fun. :bounce:

[ChickMagic]

8. I have a paradox!

One has monkeys on it and the other has bananas! Oh, wait...

[miss_kitty]

14. ...

Pair o Docs

[redwitch]

4. Settle down now, settle down.

My 8th grade English teacher said that to us every five minutes or so, every class, all year. It didn't work, but he tried. In his honor I post this Queen Threadkiller. I bow down before your majesty's greatness. May this thread never end. All hail, yada, yada, yada.

[ChickMagic]

7. That's better!

This thread doesn't count anyway, because I started it. The others were replies. You may sit by my right side redwitch!

[redwitch]

12. Am I the vice queen?

Cool, I like vice! :-)

[ChickMagic]

15. Vice is always nice!

Of course! You can even be co-queen!

[redwitch]

17. ginbarn you are very generous.

It must be that noblesse oblige thing.

[ChickMagic]

18. I'd just rather keep my head!

I'd be an awful monarch - I'd give everything away to people who need it.

[tjwmason]

13. It does count now.

Because you've replied to it. Whatever the origin of the thread, if you truly are Queen Threadkiller your replies to it would obliterate it. :P

[Michigander4Dean]

9. This is my first | nt

[ChickMagic]

10. Welcome to DU!

Hope you're having fun! :bounce:

[Michigander4Dean]

11. Well, I've been here for 2 1/2 years

I just don't post often.

[ChickMagic]

16. Ah, I see!

But are you having fun? :bounce: