Don't feel bad, sportsfans. Nobody's school has a worse team than mine.

[rockymountaindem]

The University of Toronto is currently working on its 5th consecutive winless season. They made a big deal out of the first game of the season, because evidently they thought we could win that one. People actually went to watch from the one stand of bleachers that sits next to the hallowed Varsity Field on Bloor and Bedford. Oh wait, what am I talking about... they haven't built a new stadium there since they tore down the old one in 1997 because nobody cares.

Anyway, we lost that game in overtime and it's been all downhill from there. The other day I was in the cafeteria with a friend of mine and his friend who I'd never met before. When I came back from the food line, they were talking about the football team. I said, "oh, are you talking about how shitty they are and that they can't win a game to save their lives?"

So the other dude said, "I'm gonna stop you right there because I'm on the team and a lot of people don't understand that this is a rebuilding year". I said, "I'm not going to retract anything I said. How many rebuilding years do you need? This is the fifth one! I think the university should save the money and disband the team." A pall hung over the table after that, but I regret nothing.

So cheer up everybody. I don't think there's a football team in the entire US with a worse record than U of T. And we don't care!!!

[rockymountaindem]

1. Kick

Come on, you know it's funny.