9 Things I Hate About Everyone

[jus_the_facts]

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?




2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.


3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?


4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!


5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.


6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.


8 When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?


9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

[Loonman]

1. "Look at that rain/snow, it's really coming down!"

"Well, it wouldd look pretty goddamned silly going up, wouldn't it?"

[jus_the_facts]

25. LMAO...

:rofl:

:crazy:

[SOteric]

2. In re: Number 8

Dead. Folks can do dead and so far it's much longer than life.

:hi:

[jus_the_facts]

5. That's true....

:D

:hi:

[DS1]

3. Number 4 made me snort

[jus_the_facts]

7. Yeah keep lookin'...maybe they'll find it in that parallel universe too...

:7

:hi:

[Call Me Wesley]

4. Hate leads to suffering ...

[jus_the_facts]

19. Indeed it does...

....and indeed it IS! :hi:

[redqueen]

6. pleasant

[jus_the_facts]

11. just a little humor...

....s'better than a DU pet peeve thread...I dare say! :hi:

[redqueen]

13. Eh just ignore me, I'm super grouchy today.

Yeah, it's better... but kinda the same... but not really... cause you can't argue with the person because they're not here... so... anyway.

Yeah.

[jus_the_facts]

15. I can relate....

:hug:

[redqueen]

17. Aww...

It's people like you that keep me coming back here. :)

Thank you!

[jus_the_facts]

21. You're more than welcome RQ....

...and I definitely feel the same way! :loveya:

[jus_the_facts]

22. dupe whop...dupedeeduuuwhop..DU whyyyyyy....

:evilgrin:

[ScreamingMeemie]

8. Ahem....Number 3...If you ate your cake you wouldn't have it anymore.

Duh...:P

[jus_the_facts]

9. Sure you would....in ya belly....

:D

:hi:

[ScreamingMeemie]

10. For awhile I suppose...

;) :hi:

[rbnyc]

45. Thanks.

That actually bothered me.

[no name no slogan]

12. Y'know what I hate? "FREE GIFTS"

If it's a gift, by it's very nature it is FREE. If you had to pay for it, it's not a gift, dicknose.

[jrandom421]

14. Bill Engvall said it all

"Here's your sign"

[jus_the_facts]

24. LOL....

...he's hilarious! :D

:hi:

[calico1]

16. I hate this one:

When you comment that you hate white chocolate (or whatever) and someone immediately says "you'll like this kind even if you don't like white chocolate." Um, no. I just said I don't like it. Or, when people say "try this fruitcake(or whatever). Even if you hate fruitcake (or whatever) you will love this kind!" Why do people say stuff like "even if you hate such and such you will just love this one?" Good god, I just want to smack people who do that, especially when they persist that you have some of whatever it is. :spank:

[jus_the_facts]

23. No doubt...

...that does suck! :D

:hi:

[Patiod]

18. Looking for the remote

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

I shared a beach house with 2 doofus guys, who came home one night demanding I change the channel from "Oklahoma" to the ball game. I was outvoted but wanted to see the end of Oklahoma, so I hid the remote in my cleavage.

They tore the entire place apart looking for the remote, but refused to touch the TV, so in the end, I got to see the end of my movie. All they had to do was change it manually, but that must be against the Guy Code or something...

[jus_the_facts]

20. It must be...before remotes became the norm...I'd get called....

...from my bedroom to change the channel for m'Dad...and because the knob had fallen off....had to use pliers to change it no less! :hide:

:hi:

[calico1]

27. That's kind of like people who

drive around for ages looking for a parking space close to the mall, then once they are in the mall they walk and walk and walk....

[Missy Vixen]

49. Patiod, I'm going to have to remember this one

>so I hid the remote in my cleavage.<

Now THIS is an idea... :woohoo:
Julie

[Patiod]

50. As I remember, you have more hiding room than I do...

but my memory could be off!

[Missy Vixen]

51. Somewhat less than I used to have

I'm visualizing the DISH remote at home. I'll bet Pamela Anderson could conceal that thing in her cleavage. Me? Not so sure. :scared:

Julie

[SiobhanClancy]

26. People who say,"No offense,but...."

As soon as you hear that,you know they're about to piss you off.

[calico1]

28. Or...

"I am not a racist but..." followed by a racist comment.

[jus_the_facts]

30. HEY...long time no see stranger....

:hi: :hug:

[SiobhanClancy]

33. Hi:)

Great to see you...I fondly remember our baseball discussions;) Now you guys have Johnny Damon,and that really broke my heart. :hi:

[jus_the_facts]

34. LOL...fondly?

:evilgrin:

....yeah I'm amazed at that m'self...and the weird thing is...last season I had a dream that I partied with him and his girlfiend..and now he's a Yankee?! :crazy: :D

S'truly great to see ya back!! :hi:

[JVS]

31. Oh yeah, or "Don't get angry about this, but...."

[JVS]

29. You are wrong in so many ways

1. Pointing to the watch is a handy gesture because there are deaf people out there and because usually people don't pay attention to strangers and the first asking of the time doesn't get heard but rather just gets them to turn and say "huh?" By pointing to the watch you give them a chance to quickly understand what's going on by context rather than having to ask again and take even more time.

2. These people are thinking of the future!

3. Cake realizes its meaning in the eating, yet after one is done they are cakeless. To desire to have and to eat at once is an unwillingness to accept this cosmic truth.

4. That is why it is also a cosmic truth

5. Perhaps they missed the scene because they were watching the people up front having sex.

6. Taking liberties is fun, and they are just getting you in a question answering kind of mood.

7. Obviously it means that it is both different from and superior to that which came before it.

8. The amount of time one can spend being dead dwarves the length of life. Consider Caesar, how long has he lived compared to how long he's been dead?

9. You could have arrived just as it was pulling away

[jus_the_facts]

32. Ahh thanks for all the thought...but it came from an email....

.....but I will say this...GEAUX STEELERS! :bounce:

:hi:

[britpopper]

38. Absofreakinlutley...

Big Ben and The Bus gonna run all over the prissy Colts (I'm waving my Terrible Towel)

[SpeedwayDemocrat]

46. Not this year, Absofreakinlutley...

They've had their days in the sun. I just got my Super Bowl tickets and Peyton and the Guys from Indy are going all the way this year...

[jus_the_facts]

35. kick

[Zomby Woof]

36. I'll pick just one thing: people under 30

Especially drunken quasi-repuke former frat boys and sorority girls, none of whom can handle their booze, and perform shitty karaoke to sucky INXS songs at soulless sports bars in Simi Valley.

To pick a random example of my vivid misanthropy and growing impatience with the young and the stupid.

[driver8]

39. You have a lot of those "repuke former frat boys" out there in

Simi Valley, don't you?? Most of the people I meet from Simi Valley fit that description!

[Zomby Woof]

42. Luckily I am only here on business

Home is the very blue area of L.A.!

[Starbucks Anarchist]

40. Hey, now, we're not all like that.

:)

[Zomby Woof]

43. I have been living in hotels for 9 of the past 10 weeks

So yeah, I am a bit curmudgeonly these days. :-)

Only 1 more week from tomorrow of my hotel living, then I am home! :bounce:

Then I will love everyone again. :evilgrin:

[elshiva]

37. We don't know how to change the channel without the remote

because all the TV has on it is one big on/off button.

[Montauk6]

41. That's right, and if you lose that DVD remote, you're 1000% S.O.L.

[Ellen Forradalom]

44. Oh, so you have a problem with #1, do ya?

What if we're in a noisy place? Or we don't speak the same language? I use that gesture all the time, but no one's rearranged my pretty face yet.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

47. With respect to #1...

Why doesn't anyone under 25 wear a watch?

It's no exaggeration to say that every single stranger who has asked me what time it is in the past few years has been under 25.

You can get a cheapo watch for the price of a CD, and when it breaks, you get another one. What's so hard about that?

Get a friggin' watch, and stop bothering us middle-aged people while we're concentrating on something.

[ghostsofgiants]

48. 3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".

To quote a friend fo mine: "That's like a house you can't live in...or porn you can't wank to."