Shirley Booth's family says she would have backed Bush's

[rzemanfl]

domestic spying program. Booth, who played a domestic on TV's "Hazel" would have been "100% behind" the President's domestic spying program, had she not died in 1992 at the age of 94, a family spokesperson said today.

[tsuki]

1. And I should care what a dead person thinks, because?

[rzemanfl]

22. Any dead person is twice as smart as our Pretzeldent. n/t

[pretzel4gore]

34. the absurdity of the republicans, tsuki.....

obviously, being dead, bush and his appalling antics are about 1000th on her list of concerns...the post just highlights the ridiculousness of the supporters of bush spying operation, which bring the illegal spying itself to people's attention (by suggesting a long dead tv star supports it, people look at the spying itself, and its illegal nature then is spotlighted!)
sometimes western jokes are rather convoluted, trying to explain the joke is hard, but hopefully this helps....

[The Backlash Cometh]

62. The Republicans know what they're talking about. They even know

how dead people would have voted and make sure they don't get disenfranchised.

[rzemanfl]

66. Not necessarily, have you seen the "Homecoming" episode of

"Masters of Horror" on Showtime? If not, you should search for the threads on it from last month and then see it.

[IndyOp]

85. ...seriously!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[Saphire]

155. no, what someone THINKS a dead person would think.

[libnnc]

2. yer killing me...stop it...

:rofl:

[H2O Man]

3. Still no word

on Ma & Pa Kettle?

[dflprincess]

7. No word from the Kettles

but I bet Gladys Kravitz would have supported the spying.

[DancingBear]

29. No way on Abner, though

He was Dem all the way.

The pipe was the giveaway.

[Art_from_Ark]

40. The late Erich Mielke also gives his endorsement

Ex Stasi chief dies

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/764397.stm

[drm604]

154. Dr. Bellows definitely would.

Not to mention Mrs. Brown, Detective Brennan, and Roger Addison. (Let's see how many of those references people get.)

[hyphenate]

171. Two I know

but didn't know Roger Addison. Looked him up--I should know him, as I was a devoted fan of that show. But can't place him in my mind.

[TheUnspeakable]

142. this might be the FUNNIEST post i 've ever read!!!!!!!! n/t

[xmas74]

168. I don't know.

I think that the Kettles would have voted against * and his counterparts. All those kids need healthcare and Pa never really held down a job. They certainly could have used some help in that area. And they had a hard time finding money to send the oldest ones to college and had to hope for scholarships. Sounds like they would have been in favor of increased funding for education.
On top of all that, Pa's best friends were minorities. I don't think the views of the Repug party would have sat too well with him.

And yes-I've watched every single Ma and Pa movie. It's a guilty pleasure.

[joeybee12]

4. Ok, this is a joke, right, because she was such a snoop as Hazel,

right?

Anyway, I recommend you all go and watch "Come Back, Little Sheba." Un-fucking-believable performance!

[HeeBGBz]

24. I forgot about Hazel and her snoopiness

I used to watch her when I was a kid. She was so annoying. Her and Aint Bee.

[joeybee12]

25. I used to watch both, also...

...neither show was that funny...can't even picture Hazel's family!

[H2O Man]

35. "Come Back, Little Sheba"

was indeed a great movie. When I was a kid, I had a dog named Sheba, and so I originally watched the movie for that reason. It remains one of the very best films that I have had the pleasure to watch.

[joeybee12]

39. Saw it again not that long ago...

...it really is great, and has held up well over the years.

[H2O Man]

43. I was trying to

remember when I last saw it; I think about 3 years ago. And it's interesting you mention how well it has held up, because I remember wondering if it was as good as I remembered it as being. It was.

[joeybee12]

47. God, it was sad, though...

...poor Shirley, what a lonely, lonely woman she played!

[Kurovski]

54. Booth forlornly calling out for that little dog reminds me of Bush longing

for his lost "mandate".

Of course the dog was actually supposed to be real...

[joeybee12]

56. Poor Shirley! Being compared to that creep!

[Kurovski]

58. Oh, I knew that was comin'...

Not the great Ms. Booth, just the desperate neediness of a character she played. :-)

[H2O Man]

59. I would think

that Don Knotts did a better George W routine. "Come Home Little Sheba" is a work of art.

[Kurovski]

64. "Art, soup. Soup, art."

--Lily Tomlin.

All art is soup, all life is art.

[H2O Man]

69. I think she was

calling Norton for lunch.

[Kurovski]

72. Heheheh...

Someone was clearly out to lunch during that part of her play.:-)

[Kurovski]

44. Don Knotts is still to this day funny as Dep. Barney Fife in reruns.

I shan't hear a word otherwise! I simply SHAN'T!! :-)

[Sydnie]

46. Barney would say "Nip It. Nip it in the bud"...

He would approve. Of course, he would want to listen too.

[Richard Steele]

51. Mr. Knotts is one of the most UNDER RATED actors of all time.

How many times did DISNEY make million$
on half-assed, badly-written CRAP movies,
just by casting Don Knotts?

The man is MONEY IN THE BANK.

[HeeBGBz]

144. Didn't he play a character called The Nervous Man

On some variety show way back when?

[bunkerbuster1]

158. swooped right over my head

ok, I get it now. Good 'un, that.

[Reverend_Smitty]

163. Come Back Little Sheba was an amazing film

I think she got an Oscar nomination for it

[proud2BlibKansan]

5. And Hazels' opinion is relevant because . .

[rzemanfl]

14. She played a domestic on TV. n/t

[John Q. Citizen]

6. It was common knowledge that

Booth was placed in the TV home of her TV family to collect information on the family.

So bush couldn't have broken the law by reveling her name and job.

[Kurovski]

16. Code name: "Mista B".

[AX10]

8. is this a joke?

links? :shrug:

[rzemanfl]

19. Yes, I saw the Santa Claus and *'s dog threads and wanted to

join the fun. I think the "Pickles is for it" thread is true, but why would I care about what a woman who killed her boyfriend thinks?

[H2O Man]

53. Was his name "Sheba"?

If not, it changes everything. What doies Aunt Bea think?

[Eric J in MN]

21. It's a parody of the new story that Laura Bush supports warrantless spying

nt

[rzemanfl]

31. "Parody!" Damn! I have more class than I knew! n/t

[Nomen Tuum]

9. What about Generalissimo Francisco Franco?

Been 30 years since Chevy Chase reported on his latest musings...

[Craig3410]

10. Dead, IIRC.

:evilgrin:

[melody]

15. Odds are, still dead n/t

[Kurovski]

11. Mrs. Gladys Kravitz could have been head of operations.

Either one would do, were they not presently likewise deceased.

[DancingBear]

12. You guys are missing the big picture here!

It's not what Hazel thinks, it's what Mr. and Mrs. B, and ESPECIALLY, "Sport", think.

Bobby Buntrock is the key.

Yeesh.

[ruggerson]

13. rofl n/t

[bliss_eternal]

17. Why...?

and what is the relevance of their opinion and her 'alleged' opinion?

Not to put 'you' on the spot by any means, I'm just wondering what article this was stated in and what the article's point was? Why should anyone care if Shirley Booth (who isn't here to speak for herself btw) may have supported *'s illegal activities? ...and who are these people to speak for her?

And the biggest question is--what are we all supposed to jump up now and say well--Shirley Booth would have, of course I do now! :wtf: :mad:

I hope this isn't serious...

[Kurovski]

23. Hey, wasn't Shirley Booth on a Red list somewhere?

:mad:

It isn't. Shirley played a "Domestic". It's a silly joke, followed by our even worse jokes. :-)

We're pitiful.

[rzemanfl]

28. Of course it isn't serious. I would have thought the "played a

domestic" would have been enough to show it was a joke. There are threads on Barney the dog and Santa Claus approving the spying too.

[bliss_eternal]

32. That's a relief--

sorry--if I had been here longer I would have seen that. Just signed on this was one of the first posts I saw. Didn't realize this was a mock post and sort of a copy cat thread--didn't know that was done in GD.

[NanceGreggs]

18. This story is ...

... 'a regular doozie'!

There, I've just given my age away ...

This story reminds me of a quote from Co. Parker (of Elvis management fame). He agreed to do commercials for a wine company, saying, "Elvis never drank wine in his life. But if he HAD, THIS is the wine he would have chosen."

[DancingBear]

26. You and me both

"Wait till you see my Gidget,

you'll want her for your valentine...."

I must stop this.

I must. :)

[Kurovski]

20. Is that why Hazel kept her venetian blinds open at night?

[Sydnie]

27. I knew it all along

"Come back, little Sheba" WAS code. Damnit, maybe they will believe me now.

[rzemanfl]

30. But "joined at the roots" was just flowery language. n/t

[peekaloo]

33. LOL!

Mistah B....phone call *wink*

[SoCalDem]

36. Wow.. that has totally changed my mind..

I guess I'll have to rethink my political philosophy.. The possible opinion of a long-dead actress who played a maid on tv 45 years ago has changed my whole outlook on life :)

[Kurovski]

37. Ah, yes. The power of popular culture to show us the way...

:-)

I wonder what Dennis Miller thinks of domestic spying?

Oh, wait...he ain't popular!

[rzemanfl]

67. Or cultured. n/t

[Kurovski]

68. ...and he's only been dead two years...

[rzemanfl]

80. That's right, your beard does grow for a while after you are dead.

At least I think so.

[Kurovski]

84. Nah, the head shrinks, making it only appear to be so.

[rzemanfl]

113. I think that is what is happening to my pubic hair. n/t

[Kurovski]

118. There are medications for that now.

For the phallus issues, not death.

[rzemanfl]

123. Just kidding anyway-but are those the meds I get a hundred

e-mails a week about?

[Kurovski]

127. I'll check

your dossier at Homeland Security and get back to you on that.

[rzemanfl]

128. The people who send them almost always have weird names,

maybe furriners or sumthin.

[Kurovski]

129. Just don't send any money orders to the Ivory Coast.

And stop donating to the RNC and the 700 Club!

[rzemanfl]

131. Mine always come from Kenya where some relative of mine

died with millions in the bank and no heirs or Will. Bothers me though that the solicitor also sells Rolex timepieces.

[Kurovski]

134. It's a two-fer!

Just like the excellent deal and great value we find in the Bush/Cheney brand.

We American's pride ourselves on being smart shoppers. The whole world knows it and provides offers for our discriminating tastes and sharp sense for a good investment opportunity!

[hyphenate]

172. Mine are close by

Usually in Nigeria or South Africa. Unfortunately, I never have enough money to fund their scams.

[rzemanfl]

65. I am humbled. n/t

[stillcool]

38. Any word on Sam the butcher?...

[Kurovski]

48. He became a victim of the "Gay Agenda"

Opened a bar called "The Meat Hook".

Hazel gave up her dream. Damn Libruls.

[stillcool]

55. Oh...well, now.....

there you have it. Poor Hazel. Turned into an old hag did she? All dried up like an old prune...no wonder she approves!!!

[Kurovski]

57. It breaks my heart to say it, for I loved her so, but Hazel's bitterness

turned her into a Barbara Bush doppelganger.

So sad.

[davidinalameda]

162. that was Alice not Hazel

[CatWoman]

41. anyone see "Come Back, Little Sheba"?

Shirley was great in that movie.

Other than that, um, oh nevermind.

[H2O Man]

45. See posts

25, 25, 39 and 45 on that movie.

[CatWoman]

49. D'OH!!!!!

:hi:

[Kurovski]

50. Also "The Matchmaker" by Thornton Wilder.

She was also a great stage actress.

[Captain Hilts]

152. Was in the "Philadelphia Story" with Hepburn. nt

[Clark2008]

42. Please don't tell me this is news...

Why is this news?

:eyes:

[Kurovski]

52. Just shakin' off the fleas, that's all.

And it's FAKE news. :hi:

[rzemanfl]

73. As fake as CNN, less fake than Faux, because I am not getting

paid for this.

[Kurovski]

100. And not quite as real as The Daily Show. (nt)

[rzemanfl]

70. It is news because you live in the reality-based World, while I

create my own reality and channel the supposed views of dead people from old TV shows and get enough votes for the Greatest page.

Clayton Moore, the dead actor who played the Lone Ranger, says that a renegade Afghan will kill Osama Bin Laden with a silver bullet from an ancient Lee-Enfield rifle on July 4th 2006, the War on Terror will then end and the Chinese will forgive our debts. Wally Cox, who played Mr. Peepers, says that Wal-Mart will start paying a living wage and will pay reparations to all the family owned local businesses they wiped out.

And you will not fucking believe what Eve Arden, Zazu Pitts and Gale Storm say is going to happen...

[Catherine Vincent]

60. uh..... Okay

[tuvor]

61. "Hazel" has one hell of a loyal press agent, no? n/t

[Kurovski]

63. Well, if George can talk to God,

why can't Shirley's agent talk to Shirley?

[rzemanfl]

78. Isn't that the plot of an episode of "Friends?" n/t

[Kurovski]

104. It wouldn't surprise me.

They were on way too long.

[WLKjr]

71. WTF is Shirley Booth?

Never heard of her.

[ruggerson]

74. which probably means

you never heard of Bea Benaderet either

[rzemanfl]

75. We need little clock symbols on DU to indicate our ages so we

can communicate better. Mine is a lot closer to midnight than yours is.

[ruggerson]

79. A whole Shirley Booth thread and not one pic?

We need to rectify that.

[Kurovski]

91. Oh God, she looks so YOUNG!

I think I'm gonna be sick...

[ruggerson]

92. Kind of puts the whole time thing in perspective

doesn't it?

rofl

[Kurovski]

96. I'M SURE I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!!

I was precocious. As an infant, I watched television at a 12th grade level.

Hey, where's a picture of Bea Benaderat? I bet she looks absolutely steaming hot.

Wasn't she an early women's empowerment pioneer? Didn't she do that "mirror" thing at meetings in the Shady rest?

[H2O Man]

97. No, no ....

That was Aunt Bea from Mayberry RFD. Her mother was a pioneer with Daniel Boone. The whole show was wholesome enough for the Bush's approval.

[Kurovski]

98. "The Bushes"?

so SHE started that mirror thingy...

[ruggerson]

99. here ya go

[Kurovski]

101. Oh, yes. On a voter registration drive, I see.

[H2O Man]

103. I fully expect

that some night this week, Bill O'Reilly will be reporting on Shirley Booth's support of the president. I can't decide if that will take away from the thread, or add to it?

[Kurovski]

106. ROFL!

Oh, by all means...ADD!

[H2O Man]

108. I just don't want

to hear that sick bastard O'Reilly's fantasy about washing her back in a shower. Is nothing sacred with these republicans?

[Kurovski]

110. Sex and sponges, sex and sponges...

how they ever find time to steal elections is beyond me.

[H2O Man]

114. Sponge Bob

also supports the president's constitutional right to break the law when the urge moves him.

[Kurovski]

121. But all his arguments are full of holes.

Typical leaky Republican logic.

Bobby can just go take a soak in the River Styx.

[Cooley Hurd]

145. Are you saying that SpongeBob is...

...a Log Cabin Republican?

:rofl:

[ruggerson]

107. No, O'Reilly will report on Shirley Booth's molestation

of one of the Baxter children and the fact that she was sentenced to 30 days of ironing duty.

The judge who handed down this egregiously lenient sentence?

That's right.

Arnold Ziffel.

[H2O Man]

111. Isn't that Eb Bush?

Will he nominate Arnold for the next Supreme Court opening? Save us, Bill O'Reilly!

[ruggerson]

115. Eb Bush

hahahahah

[Kurovski]

112. Irony duty?

With all the Republican child molesters in office(s) past and present, it's odd he would go after Hazel.

She must be a Dem.

[hyphenate]

173. Think "Petticoat Junction"

for Bea Bernaderet.

http://us.imdb.com/name/nm0070153/

[H2O Man]

94. I believe that picture

was taken in 1997, only five years after her death. She looks pretty darned good, for a re-run.

[ruggerson]

95. Correct

she had just returned from delivering deli sandwiches to the House impeachment managers and was showered with gifts.

[H2O Man]

76. Booth was widely

recognized as the Mother of the Simple Rights Movement.

[Kurovski]

81. A movement created to counter

The Spleen party.

[H2O Man]

83. Many ex-

Spleens joined in watching Booth's antics.

[rzemanfl]

86. But not the ruptured ones. n/t

[Kurovski]

89. And then threw the vote to Gary Moore

in the great Nielson war of '64.

[Kurovski]

136. You know, it's a real outrage that these things are no longer taught

in schools anymore.

But I suppose loyalty oaths and forced prayer are of necessity the greater concern.

All great cultures have stressed indoctrination over education. And we do want to keep America great, Don't we? DON"T WE?!

(pssst; remember that agent Mike may be on duty tonight...)

[H2O Man]

147. Our country went to hell

the day they took the Lone Ranger out of the classrooms. Drug use, violence, theft, and Ringo's drumming replaced the wholesome culture of the Old West.

[ruggerson]

82. Didn't she give up her place in line at the butcher...

to wide national acclaim?

[H2O Man]

87. President Bush has

attempted to incorporate that in his press conferences.

[ruggerson]

90. the one he gave

while Shirley was lying in state in the rotunda?

[Kurovski]

93. There were many neighborhood "meat-ups" after that

stand at the counter.

[Kurovski]

77. C'mon, help the kid out here.

:-) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shirley_Booth

[Skip Intro]

88. "Oh Mr. B!"

I don't know.

[Steve A Play]

102. ROTFLMAO! Now there's an endorsement!

Talk about desperation! :rofl:

[H2O Man]

105. Look for ads

to run on this and the theory that VP Spiro Agnew supports Mr. Abramoff. One hand washes the other.

[rzemanfl]

109. You NATTERING NABOB OF NEGATIVISM! We, the silent

majority, curse you and your ilk. These people rise to positions where they can steal great sums of money and all you can do is criticize.

[H2O Man]

116. I'll go for Wally Cox

in the middle for the win .... oh, wait! This isn't Hollywood Squares? So how the heck did Clayton Moore get on this thread? Cox and Moore are among that Silent Majority, aren't they?

[rzemanfl]

117. Dead people all belong to that silent majority the silent majority

is HUGH!!1 and gets bigger everyday.

[H2O Man]

120. It appears that you question

the possible error in bombing innocent pre-dead people in Pakistan. Keep in mind that this was part of the war on terror. Those people are either with us or against us. The people whining about innocent people being killed only give comfort to our enemies. Hazel herself said that we can best honor dead people by finishing the mission, and killing others. It's the only way to stop them there cold-blooded terrorists.

[Kurovski]

125. ...and Barbra Streisand.

[rzemanfl]

126. Pre-dead Muslims are our enemies, we must make them post-

dead quickly and in great numbers to honor the memory of our fallen heroes.

[ruggerson]

138. I believe the first prototype of the daisy cutter

was actually a "Hazel cutter."

But Booth, modest and unassuming domestic that she was, asked them to name it after her sister instead.

[Kurovski]

141. Thank you for that research. Her place in history is secure.

There are rumors that George W. Bush is actually an early bio-genetic experiment using the cells of Hazel, Phyllis Schlafly, and a Rutabaga. (The Rutabaga is two cells away from being human. Or rather, a Republican.)

This would certainly help to explain her enormous influence over our government, which has grown even greater in death.

[H2O Man]

146. It continues.

A bit of "family tree" from the Rutabaga Clan: Daisy Cutter's name had been Daisy Duke. Before stardom, she had been married to her brother David Duke, the republican klan leader of the clan, who served as the model for Duke Cunningham in Black Sheep Squadron. Hazel got stuck cleaning up after these films were made, and the rest, as they say, is history.

An overlooked part of this wonderful story is that when George W was looking for a vice president, it came down to Lawrence Welk, Shirley Booth, and Dick Cheney. Rumor has it Dick wanted to be immoralized in re-runs of Father Knows Best.

[Kurovski]

157. Ah, yes! It all makes sense now.

It was all a brilliantly devious and impossible to understand plot, skipping throughout the space-time continuum even as it ignored the laws of life and death itself.

Hmpf!, That's such typical BFEE behaviour...

[Steve A Play]

119. Having just gone back to actually read the thread

I'm not sure what's sadder, that a reasonably intelligent person like myself could have actually believed this was true or that we've reached the point in this country that it could be considered plausible. :blush:

Rove is probably kicking himself right now for not having thought of this first. :banghead:

Oy, we need a parody tag around here.

Steven P.

[H2O Man]

122. This thread has

far more "truth" in it than 75% of what the corporate media reports. Shirley Booth or Judith Miller? Not even close!

[rzemanfl]

124. This is a parody, but the Marla Gibbs press conference thread

I just posted is true, I swear.:)

[Steve A Play]

130. Marla Gibbs press conference hosted by John Edward

I'm sure. :)

Fool me once and all! :hi:

Steven P. :kick:

[upi402]

132. Ruth Buzzy is god

deal

[rzemanfl]

133. Thanks to everyone who got involved in this thread. If we can

maintain our senses of humor we may just survive BushWorld and pass through it into that bright future of shattered alliances, crushing debt, crumbled infrastructure and intractable problems that awaits us past the exit door of BizzarroWorld.

[TheUnspeakable]

143. Thank you for this important thread-perfect way to start the day!

[Marie26]

135. lol.

Have you considered securing the backing of deceased Presidents? I'd think that'd have a lot more influence than sitcom stars. K&R - just to mess w/things. :)

[Kurovski]

137. I think that all depends...

would any of the dead presidents consider starring in an action flick with Arnold Schwarzenegger?

[H2O Man]

148. There is overwhelming evidence

that the departed souls of Richard Nixon and his trusty sidekick, Spiro Agnew, are indeed being channeled through George and Dick. The reckless piano playing and the wooden teeth for Christmas make me suspect that Jim Morrison is in there somewhere, also.

[Kurovski]

159. George looks perfect in a pinafore! If only he would wear them always,

He might then find his anemic poll numbers gaining robust ascendance .

Such a charming portrait!

Kudos to the photographer, who captures the exceptionally deranged qualities of our beloved, Christmas-loving, terror-eschewing administration.

[Contrary1]

139. Now when Moe, Larry, and Curly's families

go on record saying the same thing, I may have to
re-evaluate my entire way of thinking on this...

[H2O Man]

149. Oh my gawd!

That picture is too funny.

[Vanje]

140. Yeah?

Well , you're soaking in it now!

[rzemanfl]

151. Like this???

[Vanje]

153. Hehehehhaaa

Yes.
THANKS!

[MADem]

150. Well, those who remember the show will remember that HAZEL

WORKED for "Mr. B" (ably played by Don DeFore) and of course she was a nosy domestic, so there ya go!!

[No Exit]

156. Well, that's it for me. If Hazel says it's okay, it must be okay.

"Shirley Booth"????!?

What the heck does SHE have to do with, um, anything?

[kevinbgoode]

160. ROTFLMAO. . .that's because she played an interfering,

eavesdropping maid on television for years. . .

What exactly is the relevance of the projected opinion of Shirley Booth when she has been dead for 13 years?

[Kurovski]

161. Ah! That , sir is the great "mystery of the 160 posts"!

:-)

[rzemanfl]

174. I don't understand the mystery of the now 170 posts and I am

the mysterian, although you can be question mark if you want.

[gunsaximbo]

164. mean

I always heard that in "real life" she was a mean old biotch!

[Burma Jones]

165. LOL

[Left Is Write]

166. Ummm...why did Shirley Booth's family think this was relevant?

[LaraMN]

167. I also have it on good authority (ie: I made it up) that if he were dead,

Richard Simmon's ghost would prefer a mild, smoky gouda, to the more flavorful, full-bodied cheese options. Take that to. the. bank.

[hyphenate]

169. Ummmmmmm.....and how would they know?

Did they summon a psychic to tell them exactly what Ms. Booth would and wouldn't not support? Perhaps they should talk with Pat Robertson--he claims to talk with god or jesus or someone in the beyond--perhaps they should compare notes.

[swimboy]

170. OK, now I 've seen everything!

:eyes:

[rzemanfl]

176. Just wait, coming soon, the position of the late Zazu Pitts on

torture will be disclosed.

[EstimatedProphet]

175. Good thing she's dead.

Flame me all you want...

[Shakespeare]

177. I'm waiting for Gladys Cravitz' family to weigh in. n/t