What's the dumbest patriotic song of the past 5 years?

[brainshrub]

Is there a patriotic song that has been popular among Republicans but is so stupid that you want to vomit?

[WritingIsMyReligion]

1. There are some real stupid ones out there...

Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA" comes to mind.... :puke:

[Left Is Write]

7. That song's pretty old, though.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

8. Yeah, but it's still wicked annoying.

:D

[Left Is Write]

13. Agreed. I just thought the OP was looking for newer songs...

"Bush Era" songs, you might call them.

I used to get requests for "God Bless The USA" a LOT when I did my all-request hour at a country radio station. One more request for that one or "Fishin' In The Dark" might have sent me over the edge.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

20. ...

:D

[Ariana Celeste]

31. those two drive me up the wall

i just cant do country at all anymore. when i was a little girl i loved it. but the same few songs get played over and over and over, years after theyve been done- those two especially

if it means anything, i dont listen to the radio at all because of this; everyone else does it too

last 4th of july we went to a local town celebration at the park, firework show with music. of course it wasnt live music. "god bless the usa" was played every 4-5 songs. i would have left if the firework show wasnt so badass

[TheMightyFavog]

42. He wrote it for the '84 GOP convention, IIRC

End of Line.

[brainshrub]

17. That's pretty old. (I actually like that song.)

The song is over-used, but I like it.

[Initech]

28. You're forgetting the 9/11 remix!

Reminds me of a David Cross bit - "And I will surely STAND UP next to you and defend her still today! Well, here's your chance, asshole!"

[Dukkha]

21. ummm...all of them?

that's my pick

[tuvor]

That Toby Keith "boot up yer ass" number, without a doubt.

Although I'm sure half of America would object to its being called "patriotic".

[Reverend_Smitty]

2. What's that Toby Keith song...

the one he put out right after 9/11...that one sucked bad!

[deadparrot]

3. Well, the one with about sticking a boot up Iraq's ass

was particularly charming. :eyes:

"Proud to Be an American" has been around longer than five years, but it tends to drive me up a wall as well.

[Maru Kitteh]

46. How about everything by Toby Keith. Every. Single. Thing.

Thank God he'll probably die early from all those suasages and other "manly" food.

From a Keith interview with Blender: "I was raised a southern Democrat, and my dad and granddad would roll over in their graves if they knew I voted Republican. My dad used to say, 'We don't have enough money to be Republicans.' Well, I do have enough."

[miss_american_pie]

4. That Daryl Worley nausea-inducing blech

[Catch22Dem]

25. I'll second that

At least the Toby Keith one, as gawd awful as it is, has a hint of a hook to it.

[last_texas_dem]

43. I agree

"Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue" may be, lyrically, over-the-top, jingoistic garbage, but it is at least somewhat catchy and the delivery is passionate.

"Have You Forgotten" is just exploitative country-pop at its most boring musically, with lyrics based on false information. I'm surprised Dick Cheney wasn't its co-writer.

[LSK]

48. yeah that one - basically saying invade Iraq because of 9/11

[Hosnon]

65. Agree. nt

[LeftyMom]

5. that boot up yoru ass song by Toby Kieth

Last thing I want to do is look up the lyrics to find the name. :eyes:

Does anybody else think that guy acts like such an ass because he got picked on as a kid? I mean, his name is Toby, fer chrisake, and he used to have a perm (see early album covers) so I'm guessing he got teased about his sexuality a lot in school. :shrug:

[ghostsofgiants]

6. "Iraq and Roll" by Clint Black is pretty fucking dumb, haha.

[Hissyspit]

29. That was my first thought. n/t

[Initech]

9. Toby Keith - Courtesy Of The Red White & Blue

That goes right along with the "patriotic" comedy of Larry The Cable Guy. :puke:

[WritingIsMyReligion]

10. That one takes the cake, I think.

The xenophobic Keith, I mean. What shite! :grr:

[tuvor]

16. Went to private school and grew up in Palm Beach.

Fake accent, too.

I think the joke's on his fans.

[Left Is Write]

24. According to every bio I've seen, he's from Oklahoma.

[tuvor]

26. Toby or Larry?

I'm going from a wikipedia entry for Larry the Cable Guy.

Sorry, I wasn't specific.

(As far as Toby trivia's concerned, he considers himself a Democrat!!)

[Left Is Write]

52. Yes, I was referring to Toby.

[zone]

11. Oops...

...I did it again.

[zone]

15. Oops I did it again

A duet by Big George and his son Boy George.

[Atmashine]

12. Team America - 'Freedom isn't Free'

Especially since they have no sense of sarcasm.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

18. That one's puke-worthy, too.

:puke:

[Initech]

41. You know that song was supposed to be a spoof of Toby Keith, right?

[elshiva]

14. "Let The Eagle Soar" by John Ashcroft

AND SUNG BY ASHCROFT ICKKK!

[WritingIsMyReligion]

19. ...

:rofl:

[boobooday]

32. No, no, this one is great

It's a classic. He'll NEVER live that down.

:rofl:

[elshiva]

33. Yes he will NEVER live it down because of F9/11

That was one of the most hilarious parts of a depressing movie.

[boobooday]

38. I miss him

He was really good at drawing attention to the utter absurdity of this administration.

He was like a little red flag waving all the time: "we're whackjobs! we're whackjobs!"

[Rabrrrrrr]

22. Every fuckin goddamn one of them. All patriotic songs are dumb.

At least, the republican ones.

Cash's song about the flag is awesome.

But, in terms of me, all patriotic songs are dumb. And what amazes me is that so many of the assholes who get teary eyed at the patriotic songs are people who call themselves Christians. You can't have it both ways, assholes - it's either Christ is your Lord, or America is. Not both. Dumbass unfaithful ignorant fuckbags.

[XemaSab]

36. Jim Wallis makes the same point in the book

"God's Politics," specifically that GW confuses the role of God and the role of America.

Good stuff...

[Jeffersons Ghost]

23. here's one for his followers

It's called the Neo-National Anthem

Oh dutiful, your tyrant lies

and acts like he's insane

his purple jour-nal-ism spys

will warp your little brain

oh dutiful

oh dutiful

why do you buy his crap

oh dutiful

oh dutiful

awaken from your nap


Okay, you guys better put some money in this wandering minstrels hat... do you think ghost-writers work free?

[EstimatedProphet]

27. "Taliban on the run" by Bob Rivers

Typically stupid crap from a group that thinks foreigners starving to death is funny. also "Red white and Blue" by what is left of Lynard Skynard, which actually includes the line "If they don't like it they can just get the hell out"

[boobooday]

30. I heard that Lynard Skynard thing on the radio

And I had to sit there in the parking lot and listen to the whole thing.

I thought I had somehow driven through a portal into another universe. It was that stupid.

"My hair is white, my neck has always been red, and my collar's still blue . . ."

But the "get the hell out" line is what really got me. I was on my way home from a protest. I wanted to kick their asses.

[EstimatedProphet]

39. Yeah, frankly if they don't like people speaking their minds

they should just get the hell out. This is my country. I can speak my mind.

[last_texas_dem]

44. Lynyrd Skynyrd

The current lineup should at least have the courtesy to take the "Lynyrd Skynyrd" name off the stuff they're releasing these days, even if they do have a few members of the original lineup. It's much less interesting musically (from the admittedly small amount I've heard) and the right-wing blather of the current lineup must have Ronnie Van Zandt turning over in his grave.

[fishwax]

34. Have you forgotten?

I'd say Courtesy of the Red White and Blue is a close second, but Have You Forgotten edges it out because, for one thing, the toby keith song has a better musical structure, imo, and because, while the TK song is stupid and jingoistic, it is not quite the rhetorical trojan horse of the Worley song, which mimics the bullshit rhetoric of the bush administration in equating the iraq war with a reaction to 9/11. :puke:

TK's, while stupid, was meant to tap into the anger americans felt after 9/11, while Worley's was meant to manipulate our pain into the support of iraq policy. :puke:

[Hosnon]

64. I agree 100%. "Have You Forgotten" sounds like WH propoganda. nt

[elshiva]

35. "America Rocks" written by Orrin Hatch

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

37. "Osama, Yo' Mama" by Ray Stevens

Osama - Yo' Mama
(You In A Heap O' Trouble Boy)

Osama - yo' mama didn't raise you right
When you were young she must have wrapped yo' turban too tight
She should have kept you home on those arabian nights
It's plain to see - you need some therapy

Osama - yo' mama could have done a lot better
Though I bet every day you did somethin' to upset her
By the way, we got an answer to your anthrax letter
New York City's where it's from - it's called a smart bomb

Chorus

And I can hear yo' mama sayin' now, "You in a heap o' trouble son
Now just look what you've done
Saw you on TV with yo' gun
Mercy sakes, I can't do a thing wit'cha, told ya dubyah's gonna git'cha"
And I can just hear dubyah sayin', "You in a heap 'o trouble boy
And I don't think you will enjoy
Our game of search and destroy
We got your terror right here, and we gon' run it up yo' rear"

Osama - yo' mama didn't teach you how to act
You've crossed the line too far this time, there ain't no turnin' back
You're startin' to remind us of another maniac
Yeah, you know who - he started World War II

Osama - yo' mama didn't teach you to behave
Now they say you're hangin' with the bats in a cave
Well, pullin' off that sneak attack was not too brave
Kinda makes us remember - the 7th of December

Chorus

And I can hear yo' mama sayin' now, "You in a heap o' trouble son
Now just look what you've done
Saw you on TV with yo' gun
Mercy sakes, I can't do a thing wit'cha, told ya dubyah's gonna git'cha"
And I can just hear dubyah sayin', "You in a heap 'o trouble boy
And I don't think you will enjoy
Our game of search and destroy
We got your terror right here, and we gon' run it up yo' rear"

Tag Lines

Osama yo' karma's really got you in a jam
But that's just what you get - when you mess with Uncle Sam
Osama the Taliban is history
Nobody wants to see you startin' World War Three

Osama you know the al-Qaida won't last
Osama, just like you, it's future's in the past

Osama you should've read your Nostradamus
Now all your friends are sayin' "Please don't bomb us"

[last_texas_dem]

45. That one's pretty bad

I'm not surprised I missed out on hearing it on the radio!

Ray Stevens seems like a pretty interesting guy politically. I'm a fan of his late-sixties/ early-seventies "serious" stuff (yeah, I know I have odd taste in music!) ,and although he's got some other tracks that make me think he's a conservative (like his late-sixties "The Minority" which acts as if good "normal" Americans have become a minority, repressed by a bunch of extremist screamers) he's also released stuff like "Mr. Businessman", which attacks the empty life led by a man obsessed with money, and "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex (On his Television Show)" which is a great mockery of televangelists.

(I'm probably putting way too much effort into analyzing the political views of the man behind "Gitarzan" and "The Streak" but it's just interesting to try to figure out where someone is coming from politically based upon their songs.)

[MidwestMomma]

40. I don't know if popularr but Freedom by McCartney

" Talkin' about freedom
I'm talkin' 'bout freedom
I will fight
For the right
To live in freedom

Anyone tries to take it away
They'll have to answer
'Cause this is my right"

Blech :puke:

From the man with the band who preached "Let it be"

[tuvor]

49. Oh, that WAS awful, wasn't it?

I'm not sure if it's better or worse than his Christmas atrocity.

[MidwestMomma]

50. I've blocked out everything since Freedom

Refresh my memory...what was his Christams atrocity?(I hate to ask but must know)

[tuvor]

51. Okay, you asked, MM...

"Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime"

Sorry, but you forced my hand.

[Monkey see Monkey Do]

61. That's what I was going to go with -- he really should know better.

[Fox Mulder]

47. That awful one by Lee Greenwood...

sure, it's been around since the 70's or so, but after 9/11, that's all I heard! :puke:

[mikeytherat]

53. "Democrats, stop playing your block and blame game"

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/songInfo.cfm?bandID=41129&songID=1844743

If you don't already know, go and check it out -- especially if you think anybody could keep a slow, steady, 4/4 tempo. This song manages to crash and burn on all musical fronts - musicianship, lyrics, keeping a steady tempo, you name it, they crash it!

mikey_the_rat

[brainshrub]

57. It's so bad, it's good. (eom)

[texas1928]

54. You forgot this one.

http://www.americawestandasone.com/awsao.html

[ProfessorGAC]

55. All Of Them Make Me Puke

One should never wear that sort of sentiment on one's sleeve. Writing a song about it is treacly and pathetic.
The Professor

[ET Awful]

56. What about that "Bush Was Right" shitheap?

From who was it. . . Rightmarch or some bullshit like that?

[MissMillie]

59. Good God! What is it that the song pretends that he's right about?

I mean.... yikes!

[ET Awful]

60. You have to hear it . . .

:spray: It's freakin' hysterical.

It sounds like canned background music from a cheesey 80's movie.

Some sample lyrics (sounding a little like "We Didn't Start the Fire" in tempo):

"Freedom in Afghanistan, say goodbye Taliban
Free elections in Iraq, Saddam Hussein locked up
Osama’s staying underground, Al Qaida now is finding out
America won’t turn and run once the fighting has begun

Don’t you know that all this means…
Bush was right! Bush was right!"

I was mistaken, the name of the "band" is "The Right Brothers". . . . :spray:

http://thinkprogress.org/2005/11/16/bush-was-right/

[AngryAmish]

58. Walk This Way by Run-DMC

[CanuckAmok]

62. yeah, conformity run amuck and statutory rape!

It has it all.

[Hosnon]

63. Without a DOUBT: "Have You Forgotten" - It is disgustingly obvious

from the lyrics that the author had absolutely no knowledge of foreign affairs when he wrote the song.

Typical blending of 9/11 with Iraq/Saddam...

The song asks if we've forgotten. I say no and apparently YOU NEVER KNEW TO BEGIN WITH!

[DanCa]

66. Not dumb but Born in the USA because people mistook it for patriotic.

Regan killed one of the greatest anti war songs of all time.