Post your favorite band here

[no name no slogan]

And I will tell you why they suck.
:patriot:

[flvegan]

1. The Beastie Boys

[no name no slogan]

3. Stupid-ass, unclever, white-boy wannabee suburban asshats

how's that?

[flvegan]

12. An opinion well expressed.

[MiniMandaRuth]

2. Ladytron, the Clash, The Who, and The Caesars.

I think that's pretty good for a kid my age.

[no name no slogan]

10. Here goes

Ladytron: Got their band name from cool Roxy Music song. Which does not make them cool.

The Clash: Sorry-ass worn-out pub-rockers who smelled the chance to make a buck off English teens, so they spraypainted a couple slogans on their secondhand clothes and sped up their tunes onehundredfold. Unoriginal, shrill, annoying, useless.

The Who: See the Clash, but replace "punks" with "mods"

The Caesars: Never heard of 'em, so they must suckity-suck-suck

:popcorn:

[MiniMandaRuth]

56. ....

Got some butter?

[JuniperLea]

177. Love the Clash!

Got burned out on The Who...

There are about a bajillion bands called The Caesars... which one is this?

[MiniMandaRuth]

209. They've done a song called Jerk it Out.

I also like 'You Don't mean A Thing To Me'

[LaCrosseDem]

329. the only band that matters...

The Clash

[Guava Jelly]

4. greenday cake weezer sublime

Hole the beatles bob marley and many many more

[no name no slogan]

15. okay

Hole: "whiney-ass-skank-bitch-making-money-by-fucking-my-dead-husband's-corpse rock does not a career make. Go back to acting, since it's easier to ignore movies.

Greenday: A lamer, more American version of Slaughter and the Dogs, but without the cleverness and musicianship. Go listen to your Jam records and tell me when you learn how to be original.

Weezer: Oh great, just what the world needs, more whiney white boy college music. Fuck yeah. Like one R.E.M. isn't bad enough.

Sublime: Ska is cool. White guys from L.A. trying to play Ska is not.

Bob Marley: Say what mon you asay sumt'ing? You hear one reggae song, you heard 'em all. Ras Tafari, ganja, africa, yadda yadda yadda. It makes gangsta rap sound original.

The Beatles: Oh for fucks sake, are you serious?

:D

[Guava Jelly]

37. oh get bent will ya

Hole ........live through this was a great album..I happen to love early hole music..

Greenday I have been a fan of greenday for many many years ..They A fun talented band Who I knew wasn't over after dookie..Seen them twice they kicked @$$

Weezer...Be serious I am 39 years old Weezer is much more then a collage band..Allso seen them twice..They rocked as hard as anyone
Sublime..now i know you either have not listened to good music or you are totally tone death .
Yes I am serious The beatles Fathered half the stuff you hear today

I think your snobby elitism is rude and uncalled for.
There are many bands posted here that i think suck ass but do i rip people new assholes over it?

[no name no slogan]

41. oh for fucks sake, it's a goddamn JOKE

lighten the fuck up, please.

[Guava Jelly]

46. If it was a joke then Im sorry

been in a mood lately..
Peace my brotha

[no name no slogan]

52. s'aright man

I'm a HUGE music junkie (about 60gb of mp3s, not to mention a few hundred vinyl) and I've heard quite a bit. In fact I actually like most of the stuff posted here. But once in a while it's fun to slay a few sacred cows. :silly:

[Guava Jelly]

60. After reading the rest of the post here

I feel like a retard.
Sorry again..

it must have the evil wicked Gopsux who responded..

[JuniperLea]

179. Hole? EW!

N/T!!!

[no name no slogan]

190. Heya, laya offa da Hole

I saw them back in '95 opening for Marilyn Manson and NIN, and they blow both of those pompous windbags off the stage.

[JuniperLea]

201. PFT!

Set the standard a little higher if you want to say they are better than someone... shit is better than shit? Come on...



Hole sucks your mothers socks in hell....

[hobo_baggins]

5. Elton John!

[no name no slogan]

16. Hey, Paul Schaffer's tailor called

He wants his dead leopard back.

A whiter, whinier, Englisher Ray Charles, but without any of the humor. Plus he can't write his own words. Lame-Oh.

[Guy Fawkes]

245. Real name: Reginald.

MWHAHAHAH.

[peekaloo]

6. The Shaggs.

[no name no slogan]

17. Never heard of 'em, so they suck by default

[peekaloo]

59. Oh Shirley you can do better than that.

Only suck-dilly-icious Iron Maiden fans are that narrow.

:evilgrin:

[no name no slogan]

138. No, I really can't

Somebody got "Number of the Beast" jammed in my 8-track tape deck again
:patriot:

[NoSheep]

7. hmmmm What a fabulous thread topic!!! Picking a favorite is really hard.

BAND.....I have too many decades to choose from. OKay.....Radiohead!
GO!

[no name no slogan]

19. All bands suck-- it's axiomatic

Radiohead: WTF is "OK Computer"? There's no "OK" button on my muthafucking Commodore 64's keyboard. Making a career out of fucking the rotting corpse of 80s alterna-rock == not cool.

[NoSheep]

26. that was pretty good!

[no name no slogan]

36. I'm an asshole, it comes naturally

:silly:

[NoSheep]

51. And one that admits it. I like that in an asshole.

:D

[jschurchin]

8. The best 3 person band ever.......

Rush!!!!!!!!

[no name no slogan]

22. Rash!!!!

Like Yes or Emerson Lake and Palmer, but without the clever musicianship or lyrics. Like Led Zeppelin, if a cat going through a meatgrinder were the lead singer instead of Robert Plant, but without any clever songs about Lemons.

And for fucks sake, Neil, NO MORE FUCKING DRUM SOLOS UNTIL YOU LEARN TO WRITE SOME GODDAMN DECENT LYRICS!

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

100. Cheers to that.

:toast:

[JuniperLea]

181. You will die and go straight to hell for dissing Led Zeppelin!

Heh!


I've been a Led Head for over 35 years.... can't get enough... my b/f collects a lot of bootlegs and he has tons of their stuff so I have an almost endless supply of "new" Zep to listen to.

[LaCrosseDem]

330. the whole Ayn Rand thing was pretty lame

"Look we're philosophers!"

[NoSheep]

24. I'll take this one. Rush is and always was irrelevant. Screeching,

warbling Geddy Lee and the most banal, math-rockish time changes ever. I am embarrassed for them every time I hear their crap on the radio. So many bands need good bass players. Rush should have never formed and Geddy could have kept his mouth shut and supported some really creative folks.

[JuniperLea]

178. Rush rules!

Don't judge them by what is played on the radio... they are consistently excellent live too.

Geddy Lee is a bassist's bassist!

[Sugar Smack]

9. Avalon. B52's. Dad thread. Bittersweet stimphony. Bleaugh.

:rofl:

[no name no slogan]

11. Sucks. Suck. Kicks llama's ass. Sucks. Blows.

Next question... :7

[Sugar Smack]

21. Phooey. Bleaugh. Spits Phlegm. Whalesaredying.

WaddayaWaddaya. I didn't vouch for'im. Did you call my friend a faggot. I Wanna Sponsor. LifeIsLikeABoxOfChocolatesYouNeverKnowWhatYou'reGonnaGet. Bubba Scrimp.



:rofl:

[no name no slogan]

25. Yeah, I'm talking to YOU

:*

[bridgit]

128. Dance This Mess Around...

Remember when you held my hand
Remember when you were my man
Walk talk in the name of love
Before you break my heart
Think it over, think it over
Roll it over in your mind

Why don't you dance with me
I'm not no Limburger
Just a limburger

Dance this mess around
Dance this mess around 'round 'round

Everybody goes to parties
They dance this mess around
They do the Shu-ga-loo
Do the Shy Tuna
Do the Camel Walk
Do the Hip-o-crit

Ah---Hippy Hippy forward Hippy Hippy
Hippy Shake, Hippy Shake

Oh---it's time to do 'em right
Hey now, don't that make you feel you a whole lot better?
Huh?
I say, don't that make you a whole lot better?

What you say?
I'm just askin'

Shake-Bake-Shake-Bake

Everybody goes to parties
They dance this mess around
They do all 16 dances
Do the Coo-ca-choo
Do the Aqua-velva
Do the Dirty dog
Do the Escalator

Ah---Hippy Hippy forward Hippy Hippy
Hippy Shake, Hippy Shake

It's time to do 'em right
Hey! Fred, now don't that make you feel a whole lot better now?
Huh?

Say, don't that make you feel a whole lot better?

What you say?
I'm just askin'

Yeah, yeah, yeah...
Stop!
Dance on over
Yeah, yeah

Dance, dance, dance the mess around
Dance this mess around

Shake, shake-a-bake shake
Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
Dance this mess around
Yeah, yeah, yeah......

[no name no slogan]

195. Well, try this

Tongue-tied, (I'm) short of breath, don't even try
Try a little harder
Something's wrong, you're not naive, you must be strong
Ooh, baby, try
Hey girl, move a little closer.
You're

CHORUS:
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush

Modern medicine falls short of your complaints
Ooh, try a little harder
You're moving in circles, won't you dilate
Baby try
Hey girl, move a little closer
'Cause, you're

(Chorus)

[TheFriendlyAnarchist]

13. Dave Matthews Band

Mostly pre Stand Up, but I like a few songs on there

[no name no slogan]

23. Nah, that's too easy

:D

[ghostsofgiants]

14. The Mars Volta

[no name no slogan]

27. Like a shitty Marillion, but shittier

If it's possible to get shittier than Marillion :P

[ghostsofgiants]

71. What the hell is a Marillion?

One thousandth of a Brazillion?

[flvegan]

73. Didn't he/it/they do the theme for "The Never Ending Story" with

the spiky blond hair and the wankfest soft lyrics?

[ghostsofgiants]

75. Haven't seen that movie since I was a wee one.

So I have no idea.

[no name no slogan]

91. That was Limahl from Kajagoogoo

And yes, they both suck, too.

[no name no slogan]

89. Another crappy neo-prog band

who's singer sounded like Peter Gabriel but looked like a Yeti. Yeah, they suck. And blow.

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

106. The only thing I know about Marillion

is that they have an album called Fugazi.

...and that all the Berkley grads I know think they're AMAZING. :puke:

[ghostsofgiants]

121. Haha...

All I have to say is "ouch" for Ian MacKaye.

[name not needed]

299. I doubt he would care now

He hasn't been the same since his "incident" with the cast of Friends.

[Initech]

18. The Doors

:popcorn:

[NoSheep]

28. You must admit...Morrison was a bit melodramatic.

But the music was KILLER! :D

[Initech]

44. Just like Dream Theater

A bunch of insanely talented musicians with a lead singer who didnt quite fit in with the band's music.

[NoSheep]

49. yes. you're right.

[no name no slogan]

30. Pseudo-intellectual wank-rock

played by a bunch of fuckstained acid-headed grad school dropouts who don't know a tune from their asses.

Just because you've read poetry doesn't mean you're a poet. :eyes:

[Spider Jerusalem]

20. Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds

[no name no slogan]

32. Second-rate "goff-rock" by Australian poseurs

everybody knows Austrialians are only known for three things: alcoholism, Crocodile Dundee and shitty frat-rock bands like INXS. Nick Cave ain't no Johnny Cash.

[asthmaticeog]

29. Lungfish

[no name no slogan]

33. gezhundheit

:popcorn:

[Inspired]

31. Radiohead/Nine Inch Nails/Beck

[no name no slogan]

34. NIN: whiny failed Kajagoogoo wannabe shares "his pain"

(whatever the fuck kind of torture a 20-something kid from the suburbs can "suffer") fakey-ass badboy crotch-rock for the "alternative" crowd who think they're badasses because they maxed out Mom's Visa on keggers and philosophy textbooks.

NIN == the Styx of the 1990s

Radiohead: did upthread

Beck: Dead 70s shite-rock corpse-fucker extraordinaire. "Loozer" bordered on clever, but even a stopped clock is still right twice a day.

[kid a]

98. ANother RADIOHEAD fanatic here!!!

[Throd]

35. Velvet Underground, Bob Dylan, Radiohead

[no name no slogan]

39. awright!

VU: what happens when semi-employed "experimental" musicians are left to their own devices. Had these guys actually passed the Monkees audition, we may have been spared the agony of Nico's atrocious warble and the 20+ minute earache known as "Sister Ray".

[Ariana Celeste]

38. Alice in Chains & Pink Floyd.

[no name no slogan]

48. Ew.

Alice in Chains: proof positive that Seattle in the late 80s was the shitmagnet of America. AiC had all the annoying bits of Heavy Metal (obnoxious singer, boring obtuse guitar racket), but none of the fun lyrics about elves and/or shagging. It's a bit like eating a delicious steak dinner, but having to puke it up afterward.

Pink Floyd (post-Barrett, of course): noodly, pointless obtuse "art rock" for those who find the Doors "too deep". Wanky, annoying solos, "clever" lyrics (if you've never taken a college-level English Lit. class, that is) that only sounds good if you're too fucking stoned to realize that the 8-track player is jammed.

Ever hear the joke about the two Floyd fans who sobered up? One said "gee, this sucks, wanna get something to eat?"

[Ariana Celeste]

50. LOL!

Nice! :toast:

[Benfea]

40. Grim Faeries

Not actually my favorite, although I really like them, I just thought I'd try to stump you.

[no name no slogan]

137. Color me stumped

are they related to the 70s UK band Pink Faries?

[Tikki]

42. X.........

yes, I do love Ramones music....
My favorite band to see and hear is X....



Tikki

[driver8]

58. One of my favorites to see live, too. Always an experience. n/t

[no name no slogan]

94. Y?

What, the Germs weren't enough to prove how lame the L.A. Punk scene was?

[BamaLefty]

43. Dashboard Confessionals n/t

[no name no slogan]

217. Never hearda them, either. So they probably eat ass.

:P

[Omphaloskepsis]

45. Fifteen..

Let me save you some trouble..
http://www.skatedork.org/fifteen/fifteen.htm

[no name no slogan]

171. Sorry, I can't count past fourteen

[Initech]

47. Iron Maiden

:popcorn:

[no name no slogan]

53. MAIDEN ROCKS!!!

Sorry, can't do it. :D

(Plus my pizza's here. Gotta eat!)

[Initech]

55. Agreed!

:headbang:

[Throd]

61. Don't weasel out!

Every bass line sounds lifted from "Bonanza"

[no name no slogan]

97. I didn't-- I was being sarcastic

Oh well, at least Steve Harrison could always get a job playing Dio's "Holy Diver" in a pinch.

Bum-badda-bum-badda-bum-badda BUM-BUM-BUM-BAHHH!!!
(repeat a brazillion times, and congratulations! You're written Maiden's next top 10 hit!)

[RetroLounge]

54. Oasis

:hide:

RL

[no name no slogan]

92. Greatest. Band. Ever.

Score one brazillion for Oasis

[Initech]

57. The Cure

[no name no slogan]

118. The only band that makes Joy Division look like the Osmonds

Boring, two chord dirges for those dumbass kids in highschool who smoked clove cigarrettes, wore black every day and spent their weekends drinking shitty coffee at the all-nite diner while they discussed how horrible their stupid suburban existence was. The perfect soundtrack for getting a colonostomy or undergoing a root canal (sans anesthesia, of course).

[lady raven]

220. The Cure here too.

[ismnotwasm]

62. Metallica

Go for it, everybody else does....

[no name no slogan]

136. Nah, too easy

See Dave Mathews Band

[name not needed]

63. The Clash

[ghostsofgiants]

79. He already did The Clash.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=4721132&mesg_id=4721154

[jpgray]

64. '67-'69 Soft Machine--but I already know why they suck

I like them anyway. :P

[no name no slogan]

156. Yeah, I like them too

but they still suck :P

[RevolutionaryActs]

65. I would post, but then I would get angry when you replied

and I would be forced to kill you. So I won't tell you my favorite band since I'm sure you enjoy living, and I don't really want to go to jail. :7

[sasquatch]

66. Motorhead

*Taps foot patiently*
:D

[no name no slogan]

67. Lemmy shoulda stayed in Hawkwind

and spared us the agony of meeting "Philthy" Animal Taylor.
The only thing "Fast" about Fast Eddie Clark was how quickly his sound went from kinda-sorta-okay to absolute shite. Must have been a land speed record of some sort.

And Lemmy? Too got-damn easy. :P

[sasquatch]

78. You're just begging for an assbeating

:spank:

[JuniperLea]

183. I have a picture of Lemmy grabbing my boob!

And my picture is on their website... neener neener~


hahahaha!

[sasquatch]

215. Could you post it or PM to me, PLESE!?!?

I'm soooo jealous right now.

[JuniperLea]

279. I'll find the disc

with the .jpg... their site has flipped about and the only one I see of me there is standing between Lemmy and Phil with a copy of my 'zine. Can we PM .jpg attachments? I don't use photobucket or other photo hosting... too many of my best shots have been nabbed:(

I'll get it to you somehow:)

[sasquatch]

288. YAY!!

:bounce:

[no name no slogan]

216. I have a picture of ME grabbing my b00b

[JuniperLea]

280. EW!

Perhaps you should refrain from putting 'em on the glass!

heh

[no name no slogan]

68. ALL YOUR FAVORITE BANDS SUCK (even mine)

and once you admit that, life will be much MUCH simpler.

[RevolutionaryActs]

69. Well actually that's kind of true.

Because no matter who you love, there is someone out there who hates them. So yeah, in a way all bands do suck. :o

[elshiva]

86. "All professors who teach at Johns Hopkins are lame in some way."

No one's perfect. Even the better groups can't always write a good song.

[LynneSin]

70. Ted Nugent - just love the guy

[RevolutionaryActs]

72. GAHHHHH!

My eyes! THEY BURN!!!!! :cry:

[LynneSin]

76. What, you think I was going to let him bash Led Zeppelin

NEVER!!!

[RevolutionaryActs]

77. But really, you should have put a warning on that.

Children post here. :o

[LynneSin]

80. And we know how Ted Nugent liked the young girls

Wait - so did Jimmy Page

:crazy:

[RevolutionaryActs]

81. You are an evil, evil woman

:puke:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

102. You aren't, but I am. HEY NO NAME NO SLOGAN! LED ZEPPELIN! -nt

[no name no slogan]

117. Zeppelin picks the corn out of my...

But I mean that in the best possible way.

If you like the sound of dork-fingered guitar, wankadoodley drumming, and the sound of a cat going through a meatgrinder, then Zeppelin is for you! They take all those shitty blooze records cranked out by dime-a-dozen mumbly guys from the delta in the 1940s, turn them up to eleven, and then add lyrics about elves and/or shagging so the slackjawed doobie-smoking set has something to listen to while they bake up and raid mom's refrigerator.

:yoiks: (as he seals his own death warrant)

[JuniperLea]

186. You a BOC fan, LynneSin?

Did we talk about this before? How Donald "Buck Dharma" Roeser is a RW conservative?




I think he needs waaaaaay more cowbell! ;)

[no name no slogan]

90. What happens when ego > talent

the worst example of aural masturbation ever committed to record-- with the exception of Zep's "Presence", of course.

[JuniperLea]

184. EGADS!

Even if I liked his music, I'd hate him for his RW BS!

[rbnyc]

74. I dare you!!!

Throwing Muses

[no name no slogan]

96. Tossing Cookies

proving once again that the best thing to ever come out of Boston is the Charles River-- which ain't saying much. More whiney self-centered kollidge dropout music for the fratboy set who toss this on to prove to their sorority sister girlfriends that they're "hep" and not Neanderthals, like the prove every weekend.

:hi:

[rbnyc]

105. LMAO

If it weren't so funny, I'd be pissed.

:hi:

[no name no slogan]

116. *whew* off the hook again

Heh, it is all meant in good fun. I actually like the Muses, as well as most of the other groups posted here, too.

Except for Oasis. They just plain suck. :P

[rbnyc]

120. Agreed.

;-)

[LSK]

82. The Corrs

Lets see, they look great, they play their own music, and they write their own songs.

[no name no slogan]

132. The Beer, or the shitty new wave band from Boston?

Either way, both blow goats
:patriot:

[stpalm]

83. Bomb the Music Industry! (nt)

They rule, though... they don't suck.

[no name no slogan]

270. Oh, they're a band?

Cloyingly annoying name. Almost as stupid as "Mr. K's Dream" if that's possible.

I got a better idea for a name: "Clive Davis Can Lick The Sweat Off My Nutz". Guaranteed top 40 hit.

[tarkus]

84. Does Simon and Garfunkel count as a band?

I bet you will have a pretty hard time trying to point out a flaw in Simon and Garfunkel, what with them being flawless and all...

[no name no slogan]

99. "hep" music for those who think the Kingston Trio "sold out"

bland, middle-class NYC background music for the self-obsessed navel-gazing baby-boom generation. What passes for "folk music" to those who are "intimidated" by Woodie Guthrie and Pete Seeger.

[TInCanCommunications]

85. Sufjan Stevens?

Don't know.
My favorite band just quit (Guided By Voices)

Waiting for a new band to sweep me off my feet.

Sufjan Stevens' stuff is pretty amazing.

[Susang]

109. I dig him too, so I'll second that nomination

Sufjan Steven! Sufjan Stevens! :D

[no name no slogan]

153. Don't know 'em

But GBV makes me wish I was tone-deaf. Yet more "clever" poorly-dressed drunken frat-boy midwestern wank-rock for those who spend their days stealing wi-fi in coffee shops and their nights in newly "fashionable" dive bars ironically listening to Lynyrd Skynyrd and REO Speedwagon on the jukebox while drinking Old Milwaukee out of plastic cups.

[TInCanCommunications]

231. You have no fucking clue what GBV is all about

Frat boys?
Guided by Voices and Gentrification do not belong in the same paragraph.

[no name no slogan]

268. Yes I do

Robert Pollard should stick to drinking. It's one of the few things he's actually good at. GBV is for middle-class kollidge dropouts who wear clunky plastic-rimmed glasses and show their working-class "cred" by wearing Dickies clothes going to "townie" dive bars and playing Hank Williams on the jukebox.

[TInCanCommunications]

272. Much better!

They fucking RULE!

[no name no slogan]

282. Agreed

I actually dig them myself. Sad to see them hang it up, but you just know that there will be reunions every once in awhile. When you've been playing with the same group of people for 20 years, it's pretty hard to completely abandon them. I've now been playing off and on with the same drummer for 18 years (half my life), and I really can't imagine playing in a group that didn't have him on the throne (or playing drums for that matter).

[MrScorpio]

87. Zero7 Featuring Sia Furler

:shrug:

[no name no slogan]

162. Yet more proof that I need to pirate more MP3s

:D

[DBoon]

88. The Minutemen

[no name no slogan]

154. Dresses like CCR, sounds like pre-rehab Stooges on crack

The band who proved that "anybody can do it", yet proved that NOT "anybody can do it". Spastic seizure-like music that only smarmy elitist music snobs could find enjoyable. The one good thing about The Minutemen: they're one of the few bands I can put on that make Throbbing Gristle sound listenable to the average human.

[tigereye]

160. wow, skewering the Minutemen and Throbbing Gristle in one

post.

You are the master.

[no name no slogan]

163. You are too kind. but I'm a bigger asshole than a master

unless you mean master....

oh never mind

[DBoon]

167. An army of aging punkers and indie youth has declared war on you

You are being burned in effigy as we speak - or at least your avatar is being burned in effigy (it is a very small fire)

[no name no slogan]

194. Hey, as long as Mike Watt doesn't plug in

if I have to hear yet another wanktastic bass solo that makes me yearn for the subtlety of Les Claypool, I will surely slash my wrists!!!

:silly:

[DBoon]

203. We are evil

but not that evil

[tigereye]

161. is that the Minutemen documentary?

is it out to purchase?

That is the youngest pic of them I have ever seen.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

93. Pavement

[no name no slogan]

158. Makes Guided by Voices look practiced and well-rehearsed

and yet another reason why Stockton, CA should be obliterated and paved over. More pretentious college wank-rock for those who think Michael Stipe is "clever" and U2 is not holier-than-thou enough. Malkmus should go back to working behind the counter at Starbucks.

[TInCanCommunications]

233. Dude, you're fucking music critiques suck ass

Pavement had some kick-ass records.
And Malkmus' solo stuff is even better.

BTW, he never worked at Starbucks.

[no name no slogan]

246. Yeah, and Steve Malkmus gave handjobs to Lester Bangs

Pavement not only sucks, they blow. Okay, maybe Malkmus never worked at Starbucks, but he spent a hell of a lot of time as a the "helpful hardware guy" at Ace Hardware in Stockton.

Maybe he can get his old job back, now that nobody but his loyal fanbase of 427 gives a damn about him anymore.

:silly:

[Ron Mexico]

95. Queensryche (n/t)

[noonwitch]

113. They started to suck when DeGarmo left the band

I really pissed off a boyfriend once by comparing Queensryche to Styx (concept albums, a lead vocalist with a classically trained voice, etc.). I told him in 10 years, we'll be seeing Tate playing Pontius Pilate in a travelling production of "Jesus Christ, Superstar", too.

Seriously, I actually really like their music through "Empire". After that is when DeGarmo left the band and they never really put out a good cd since. Tate's voice is really at it's best on "Operation: Mindcrime".

[Ron Mexico]

114. I agree with you entirely, although I did like

the album after Empire (the one with "I am I" on it). It certainly wasn't as good as the three albums that came before it, but taken on its own it I thought it was pretty good. They lost me with "Q2K."

Your remark about Tate playing Pontius Pilate almost made me spit coffee, BTW.

[no name no slogan]

134. Good Call! Queensryche == Styx

overblown, pretentious guitar wankery who figured out it paid better to emulate Styx than it did to emulate Iron Maiden. Like most "serious" metal, it only sounds good if you're a 14-year-old acne-pocked suburban male who thinks Yngwe Malmsteen (sp?) is "serious" music. Bleh.

[progmom]

101. Nominated

....and bookmarked. :patriot:

[no name no slogan]

244. Never heard of 'em. So they suck by default

:P

[XNASA]

103. Ministry

[no name no slogan]

168. Schizophrenic-istry

WTF are you, raging hard-on death metal with dumbass samples or an even more vapid Kajagoogoo? Either way, I don't get it. It's like an in-joke that only the really dumb kids at school find funny. Go back to 1,000 Homo DJs Al, at least you were in shittier company with Reznor et. al.

[WeRQ4U]

104. HUM

Go at it.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

119. Wow!

Someone from outside of Champaign-Urbana who's heard of Hum.

I fondly remember when they and the Poster Children and Menthol were the monarchs of my college music scene.

[ghostsofgiants]

123. They're not THAT obscure...

"You'd Prefer An Astronaut" is a great album.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

126. Maybe it just seems that way since I was living there at the time

They were all over the "local" radio, but I knew people up in Chicago who'd never heard of them before.

Nice to know that they were heard and liked outside of our state.

[WeRQ4U]

131. They're known.

Definitely not "well known", but known. "I'd like your hair long" gives me goose bumps every time I hear it.

They actually had a couple mainstream songs that hit the radio. "Stars" from "You'd prefer an astronaut" and one that I once heard played at.......wait for it.........Abercrombie and Fitch was "Green to Me" off of the "Downward is Heavenward" album.

It's a pity they had to split up. If you're interested, check out the bands created from the former members:

Tim Lash created "Glifted"
Matt Talbot created "Centaur"

Neither sound anything like HUM, but I just thought I'd let you know.

[asthmaticeog]

166. Hey, I'm a big fan too.

Never missed a Hum show within a two hour drive.

And I even remember when Menthol were called "Mother".

[WeRQ4U]

297. My buddy followed that band EVERYWHERE.

You wouldn't miss a show within 2 hours....he drove to Bellevue Washington TWICE and at least 4 times to Champagne to listen to them. At the time he lived on the Eastern edge of NOrth Dakota. He was nuts. He saw them so often that he had dinner with them at least once. Once, when his car was towed in Minneapolis, Matt gave him cab fare. Lol.

[no name no slogan]

169. Lemme guess, you were an English major

and ended up working at Starbucks after you graduated right? I only ask because only obtuse English majors could appreciate the aural dreck of Hum. Hum. Hum. Okay we get it. They're tone deaf.

[kwassa]

107. Kassav'

Zouk la sé sèl médikaman nou ni.

but you knew that.

[no name no slogan]

135. Gezhundheit

I no mi Ingles

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

108. Elvis Costello.

Looks like I should take a number....

[no name no slogan]

145. Angry British wuss-rock that only other angry wusses could like

Also named himself after The King of Rock and/or Roll ® and the fat idiot from the "Who's on First" standup team. Tried to make "angry white nerdboy with guitar and smart mouth" interesting, but failed miserably.

[Susang]

110. The Decemberists

Take your best shot, I have faith in you. :D

[no name no slogan]

172. I am a pathetic piece of crap

I actually have not heard them (yet), but judging by the name their either a bunch of Commie-Loving America-Hating College Dropout Marxist Trustafarians who've never had to work a day in their lives and own every Morrissey B-side (and have duplicates of the crappy ones-- i.e., all but "Last of the Famous International Playboys").

:P

[Initech]

111. Tool

:popcorn:

[no name no slogan]

140. Tools

braindead fist-band-mania sludge rock for adolescent males that makes me appreciate the finer points of Alice In Chains. That's pretty fucking sad.

[Ariana Celeste]

164. ooh, burned again!

:D

[T_i_B]

112. Arctic Monkeys!

[no name no slogan]

263. Just glad they don't migrate

STAY THE FUCK UP THERE!!! WE DON'T WANT YOU DOWN HERE!

[T_i_B]

296. Careful now

I'm from Sheffield too you know. (And they even namecheck the area of town where I grew up in on Fake tales of San Francisco!)

[Beware the Beast Man]

115. Kyuss

[no name no slogan]

173. for those who think Hawkwind "knew" their instruments too well.

What happens when you let D&D dorks have guitars and free time, after they quit their jobs at the comic book store. Their dungeonmaster should be ashamed of him/herself.

[RandomKoolzip]

122. The 8th Grade

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

125. Haywood Yards

[RandomKoolzip]

127. That's not a valid reason.

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

129. What genre is

"That's Not a Valid Reason?" I haven't heard of them.

[RandomKoolzip]

133. Post-ambient IDM glitch hop/country.

Plus, they dress like mods.

[no name no slogan]

142. Yeah, I see that storming up the charts

in the next, oh I don't know, TEN MILLENIA or so.

Aging clueless hepsters who think that writing catchy, memorable songs that people actually LIKE to listen to is "too commercial". They'd be truly crestfallen to have a top ten hit, because it would mean they'd have to move out of mom's basement and start doing their own laundry for a change.

:P

[RandomKoolzip]

144. Actually, my mom lives in my basement and I do HER laundry.

But apart from that, a reasonable assessment. Thanks, NNNS!

[no name no slogan]

149. Anytime

I've done a decade's worth of hard time in bands just like that. :hi:

[martymar64]

124. Jethro Tull

Ian Anderson is arguably the BEST flautist in the world.

[no name no slogan]

130. Ian Anderson is an over-rated putz who should stick to goatherdin

If Ian Anderson is the best flautist in the world, then Ronnie James Dio is the best operatic tenor on earth.

Yet another lameoid British "prog-rock" band with too instrumental ability but not enough sense to write a decent melody. Ponderous, pretensious lyrics that only a sophomore English major would find interesting, plus a drummer who kicked the bucket because of advanced TOOTH DECAY.

Having lived in the UK briefly, I know that the English don't like their dentists, but to die because you wouldn't get a rotten tooth checked out? Hello, the 15th century called, it wants its diseases back.

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

139. Hey, I said Elvis Costello and I want him to be insulted.

:taps foot impatiently:

[no name no slogan]

141. DAMMIT I'm working on it

sorry, he's a little harder to insult. How's this for starters:

Lost the 1979 Grammy for "Best New Artist" to A Taste Of Honey

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

146. Say no more. Perfect.

[alarcojon]

187. Why the fuck is he so hard to insult?

I'm soooooooo disappointed

edited to add: we all have our sacred cows.

[no name no slogan]

221. Sorry, I had a case of the runs

and had to make tracks before I created an even bigger mess

[no name no slogan]

271. The best thing about sacred cows is barbecuing them

preferably over coals, slathered in a rich sauce made from molasses, ketchup (catsup is for wusses), brown sugar, mustard and maybe a pinch of cayenne.

[atomic-fly]

143. Robyn Hitchcock and the Egyptions

[no name no slogan]

150. "Globe of Frogs"? How about SNAKES ON A MUTHAFUCKIN PLANE

Pretending you're strange and actually being strange are two different things-- neither of which is interesting to ANYBODY over the age of 22. At least that other loozer from that other pointless obscure college-rock band he was in cowrote "Walking on Sunshine", possibly the greatest pop record of all time (right after "The Rodeo Song" of course).

[atomic-fly]

151. hehehe...but "walking on sunshine"....puke!

[no name no slogan]

152. SNAKES!

ON A MUTHAFUCKIN PLANE, BITCHES!


And Katrina & The Waves == Greatest band since the Beatles (but not as great as Oasis)

[Initech]

147. Bob Marley & The Wailers

:popcorn:

[no name no slogan]

155. See #15

still true and valid today

[Popol Vuh]

148. Pink Floyd

n/t

[JuniperLea]

202. Love love love the Floyd!

The last two albs are iffy... but damn... They hit my all time fav list after Knebworth!

[PittPoliSci]

157. Darkest Hour

Who?

[no name no slogan]

159. Turn on a light-- then it won't be so damne dark

:P

[bridgit]

165. rammstein, ekova, talvin singh, john mayer trio, ian van dahl...

the list goes just like the beat ~

[JuniperLea]

189. GAWD I love Rammstein!

[bridgit]

193. really, cool, pick up their live DVD it's tear your face off shit...

their work in lynch's 'lost highway' is spot-on as well :headbang:

[JuniperLea]

200. Live aus Berlin?

Or is there another?

Live Aus Berlin is an alltime fav... love the S&M, the massive spewing penis, etc. And the boat ride thru the crowd rules!

[bridgit]

204. that's the one...

:hi:

[Sugar Smack]

170. The Chicago Philharmonic Orchestra *blows smoke from pistol*

Sissies, right? :D

[bridgit]

174. but honey...

an orchestra is not 'a band', unless you're talk'n like "alexander's rag time band" or some such maybe :shrug:
otherwise let's get all down mit der klassic' ja!

[Sugar Smack]

180. I need you to show me!

Guide me to what is real!!:cry: Dammit, I can't do this on my own, Grandmaster!

[bridgit]

182. now you're just being mean...why...

:yoiks:

[Sugar Smack]

191. No I'm not! I love you, silly!

The OP is not paying any attantion to me (feh) and I wanted some sister-comfort. I love you to pieces, and you know what? I may just get up right now & make some pepperoni lasagna! Care to join me?

:loveya:

[bridgit]

198. weeeee, that's better...

http://www.threebrain.com/weeeeee.shtml cause of all the kinks over here if you suggested that i eat shit & die i would consider it :loveya:

[no name no slogan]

188. Pure Poseurs

The London Symphony Orchestra could kick their asses even after a night at the pub.

[HEAVYHEART]

175. System of a Down

Best band ever.

[no name no slogan]

223. System of a Wank

One Jane's Addiction is bad enough. Just because you can use drop-D tuning doesn't make you cool, or even as entertaining as, say,... Poison.

[JuniperLea]

176. Turbonegro

Supersuckers


Masters of Reality


The Piss Drunks


The Cramps


Hellacopters


The Tea Party


The Brain Surgeons







No need to mention Black Sabbath, Stones or Led Zeppelin... the greatest bands of all time... oh yeah, and the first incarnation of The Blue Oyster Cult... with the Bouchard brothers;)

[no name no slogan]

196. Any band who has to shill on "Viva La Bam" must blow chunks

n/t

[JuniperLea]

199. Hahahahhaha!

Man, you remind me of this guy who wrote a book on a bunch of 70's bands... trashed almost all of them and it was funnier than hell...

So, to which are you referring with your chunk blowing?

[no name no slogan]

205. Turbonegro

I think it was on season 2 when Bam and crew had them on. IIRC they flew to Europe to see them. It was a cool ep, and the band was alright.

[JuniperLea]

208. I find their...

homo-erotic punk metal extremely entertaining... anyone who can create a rockin' tune about a pizza joint... and then extol the pleasures of an erection or anal sex all on one album...

Truthfully, I'm still waiting for them to do another "Age of Paparius"... but Hank, EuroBoy, et al are pretty freaking weird and damn good rockers, imho.


What about the rest of my list? Come on! Beat me up! heh!

[JuniperLea]

278. Robert Christgau

That's his name... funnier than hell! He is quite possibly the only person I know of who has actually listened to more rock 'n roll than I have;)

[no name no slogan]

281. YES! Christgau was a GOD of rockcrits in the 70s and 80s

His stuff for Creem used to be golden. I was also a fan of Lester Bangs when I was younger (in college), but now that I'm nearing 40 I find a lot of his stuff pedestrian; unreadable even.

Kind of like the majority of so-called "indie-rock" that's come out over the last decade. :hide:

[JuniperLea]

185. The Hidden Hand

[no name no slogan]

262. So hidden, only esoteric fans of obscure stoner rock "get them"

Yet more proof that no matter how much weed you smoke, some things never get better.

[JuniperLea]

277. BWAAHAHA!

Good 'un;)

[alarcojon]

192. Norah Jones

[JuniperLea]

210. Yawn....

My daughter loves this emo crap though, so you get one point:)

Do you like Rilo Kiley too? EGADS! BARF!!! That's ok though... it takes all kinds... and this stuff is a winsome juxtaposition to the grinding, throbbing metal I like. Takes all kinds:)

[alarcojon]

225. What, are you taking over for nonamenoslogan?

Thanks for sharing B-)

[JuniperLea]

241. I co-wrote a fanzine for many, many years

VoxMetalluM... a publication of the Headbangers SIG of American Mensa... the poison is in my bloodstream, poison's in my brain... can't stop myself...

[no name no slogan]

247. Aw, Jeebus, an ex- MUSIC CRITIC

that fucking well explains EVERYTHING!

You know the old saying: "Those who can, play. Those who can't, CRITIQUE!"
:hi:

[JuniperLea]

276. Explains everything?

Yes, yes it does...

I guess that's why you are critiquing here:) *rim-shot*


For your info, I spent 20 years on stage in musical theatre, and another 10 as a studio vocalist. I "can do" just fine, thank you. Thank you very much;)

There came a time when I decided it wasn't fair for my three kids to "grow up backstage"... literally. And when they grew up and needed college tuition... I had to make a decision. I needed a lot of money, so I used my other talents. I work for a PR firm now and my middle kid is in a band, playing the clubs on the Sunset Strip where I misspent my youth:)

I'm good with it. I have awesome memories and a photo album most rockers would kill for. My picture with Rob Halford, Ozzy Osbourne, Motorhead... so on and so forth, ad nauseum.

One correction, though. Heh... I know enough to critique and don't plan on ever stopping;) Just on a hiatus... going to get Vox MetalluM up online! Woooooot! \m/

[no name no slogan]

230. Gen X's answer to Anne Murray, but not nearly as cutting edge

yet another whiny chick who thinks the rest of the planet actually gives a shit about her complicated little life.

[Dees]

197. 1910 Fruit Gum Company

[no name no slogan]

213. Archies wannabees

A good reason why Osama bin Laden should declare a fatwa against rock music.

[0007]

206. Has anyone here ever heard of Spike Jones?

[no name no slogan]

265. Yeah, but all jazz sucks

Jellyroll Morton should've joined the Merchant Marine instead of playing piano. Then we would've been spared the likes of Kenny G.

[libnnc]

207. Chryssie Hynde and the Pretenders

[no name no slogan]

212. Poor man's Kinks, yet not as musically "tight"

a good reason why British boys should not be allowed to own electric guitars and listen to 60s mod (and hang around with American expats from Akron). Just because you can write songs in 7/4 does not mean you should play them for other people.

[JuniperLea]

211. My boyfriend has a t-shirt that sez....

"Your Favorite Band Sucks"








Yous should get one:)


\m/

[no name no slogan]

214. I've seen that one

and was going to get it to wear onstage with my band. I only fear nobody would "get it", though :(

[cynatnite]

218. Linkin Park and Godsmack n/t

[no name no slogan]

219. Too easy. NEXT!

[cynatnite]

222. What? Don't have anything sucky to say about them?

:rofl:

[no name no slogan]

224. I don't want to overload the new DU servers

:7

[Throd]

319. Primus

[atomic-fly]

226. the Stranglers

[no name no slogan]

227. Male chauvanist pigs who make "Eddie and the Hot Rods"

look like the bleeping Beatles. Unfortunately they were lumped in with Punk, but actually just another lame-ass pub-rock band who have more in common with the atrocious Nick Lowe and pre-Clash Joe Strummer. The perfect music for hitting on your best friend's underage little sister or your own first cousin.

:P

[atomic-fly]

240. dang...you are good.

[musical_soul]

228. Aerosmith will always be my thing.

I don't care if they are out.

[no name no slogan]

264. Just get a prescription from a doctor, you'll get cured

Plus you won't have Steve Tyler's ugly-ass wannabee Mich Jagger mug staring you in the face. If the stones hadn't spent the 70s and 80s in rehab, Steve Tyler would just be known as "that dude whose hot daughter played that elf chick in Lord of the Rings". Joe Perry would be a part-time pot dealer and work part-time in accessories at Guitar Center.

[HuskerDU]

229. 2 fav bands: the Minutemen and the New York Dolls.

They always go back and forth between 1 and 2.

[HuskerDU]

234. Here goes:

The New York Dolls- a retroactive rip-off of Winger/Warrant/Slaughter/Brittney Fox.

[DBoon]

235. The Dolls: The Rolling Stones with bad makeup

nt

[johnfunk]

237. ... and better songs

[no name no slogan]

249. but not as good junkies

RIP Johnny Thunders and all their drummers

[HuskerDU]

250. no name- thanks for some good laughs.

I thought I was fairly knowledgable about a lot of bands, but whoa, you take the cake.

And yeah, you don't wanna drum for Spinal Tap, or the Dolls. BTW, your disses remind me of the Spinal Tap/ Mighty Wind guys. They were extremely funny AND dissed the intended targets. Yet they also were somewhat endearing to them as well. Well done!

[no name no slogan]

252. Thanks, you are too kind!

I only diss 'em if I know 'em. And if I know 'em, I probably own something of theirs, too. And if I own it, chances are I listen to it, too. It's a vicious circle. If I had a quarter for every song by these groups that I've heard or owned, I would have enough to do laundry for the next several centuries.
:)

[HuskerDU]

253. I could tell that you really liked most of the bands you were

dissing. I mean, how would you know so much about the Minutemen if you didn't like 'em?

Turnabout is fair play however. So what is your favorite band so that the rest of us may return the favor?

[no name no slogan]

254. heh heh heh heh heh

stay tuned... I will soon be posting a new thread about that... :evilgrin:

[no name no slogan]

256. And uglier, if at all possible (n/t)

[zone]

232. KC and the Sunshine Band

[no name no slogan]

255. Pure Pop Genius

that is, if you are a facking masochist.

Yet another white boy ripping off brown people (Afro-Cubans in this case) and getting rich offa their pioneering work. If KC were dead, he'd be up in heaven with Col. Tom Parker and Elvis, smoking cigars and sipping sherry in Ye Olde White Mans Exclusive Private Club, laughing their asses off while an unsuspecting public kept lining their dead pockets.

[johnfunk]

236. Teenage Jesus & the Jerks

Legendary NYC downtown band infamous for their 10-minute sets and incomprehensible wall of noise, fronted by performance artist Lydia Lunch. They made the Sex Pistols sound like the Cowsills...

[no name no slogan]

257. Heh! Right on brutha!!

Makes me want become a Band of Susans groupie. Or sit through several hours of Glen Branca's guitar "symphonies". Yeeeesh. Yet more proof that it's not southern Cali that should sink into the ocean, but DT NYC.

:yoiks:

[u4ic]

238. Mr K's Dream

:rofl:

[Sugar Smack]

239. NICE one!

I want to hear the answer to this, esp. if the word "wankers" is involved.


:rofl:

[no name no slogan]

243. Mr. K's Nightmare is more like it

schizophrenic, derivative wanky-doodle-doo mope-pop from a group of ex-English majors who should have never quit their dayjobs. Thank god for smokey coffee shops near college campuses, or else the likes of these guys would never have gainful employment. Worse than getting earwormed with "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" for 30 years.

Here's proof of their utter shite-ness:
Oceans and Crapways
Call In Shitty
Blind (but wish I was deaf)
(Hope You Get The Clap for) Valentines Day
Suzanne (run away from these sick f*cks as far as you can)
(They'll Still Suck In) November
Completely Batshit Crazy
Pass Gas
Puking After Midnight
Nasty Case of the Runs
All Fall Down (the crapper)
One Hand Clapping (kiss my fat hairy white Zen Butt)

Ah-weeemah-wuh Ah-weemah-wuh Ah-weemah-wuh Ah-weemah-wuh

[Sugar Smack]

248. You forgot "Listening to these guys is more fun than

being poked in the eye with a sharp stick, but not by much".

:rofl:

[no name no slogan]

261. Or crapping out broken glass

while you've got a nasty case of the 'roids. :D

[SaveElmer]

242. Great Big Sea...nt

[no name no slogan]

266. A good reason to drain the oceans

and make the deserts bloom. Yeesh. Great Big Dump is more like it.

[Maestro]

251. Hey this thread is hilarious!

I will play.

I really can't say that I have a favorite band but some stuff currently getting heavy airplay in MaestroLand are:

1) Mastodon
2) SOAD
3) Depeche Mode
4) The Cure
5) Sherly Crow
6) Duncan Sheik
7) The Wiggles

[no name no slogan]

260. Duncan Sheik-- proof that imitating Nick Drake

can get you laid in the short-term, but is not a solid career move if you plan on doing something besides working behind the counter at Guitar Center in ten years. Kind of like a gravely-voiced Michael Penn, but without the talented spouse (Aimee Mann, for those keeping score) or tunes that keep my interest past the :59 mark.

The best thing I can say about Duncan Sheik is that my ex-wife got his CDs in the divorce settlement, and I was spared the hassle of moving them to my new place.

[Initech]

258. Depeche Mode

:popcorn:

[no name no slogan]

259. There are two kinds of working-class English teenagers

Those who want to be football stars, and those who get beaten up by those who want to be football stars.

Depeche Mode falls firmly in the latter camp. Preeny, bleepy, annoying pseudo-pop that sounds like R2D2 getting a handjob from C3PO. Unlistenable, unless you're a dreary mopey pockscarred teenager who likes Emily Dickenson poetry and staying out of the sunlight. Only made more ridiculous by the Dave Gahan's attempt to look like a "bad boy" by wearing a leather jacket and trousers.

[Initech]

267. Do the Red Hot Chili Peppers next.

[no name no slogan]

269. Makeout music for aspiring date-rapists

Flea is possibly the most annoying bass player in the world, except for Geddy Lee. At least Flea doesn't try to sing, though. Overrated, talentless, hackneyed, but possibly the only reason suburban teenagers would even know who Stevie Wonder is.

[enigmatic]

273. Uncle Tupelo

[no name no slogan]

283. Just because you listen to the Eagles and "Sweetheart of the Rodeo"

Does NOT mean you're any good. Yet another excuse why the sale of electric guitars should be banned to white teenagers. Crappy Hank Williams tributes to clueless indie-rock snobs who think they "know" country because their daddy played them Johnny Cash and CCR records while they were snotnosed brats spitting up pureed peach cobbler.

[enigmatic]

291. Oh, that's good

Kudos to you, my friend:)

[opiate69]

274. Black Sabbath

[no name no slogan]

286. Doing bad Zeppelin impressions does not a career make

Take a shitty blooze record, slow it down, turn it up to eleven, slow it down some more, then crank it up to twelve, throw in references to Crowley and/or Satan and/or spacemen and/or fairies, slow it down more, and put a yowling hyaena on vocals, and you've got Sabbath.

If Sabbath had never existed, Tony Iommi would still be a lousy unemployed auto mechanic in Burmingham, Ozzy would be a homeless twisted sot, and the world would have been spared the likes of Soundgarden -- which would be punishable by death in more civilized countries, like Taliban-era Afghanistan or Peter The Great-era Russia.

[opiate69]

289. Ouch! Lol.

well played, old man. :P

[leeroysphitz]

275. Dee-Lite featuring Towa Tai and Lady Miss Kier...

[no name no slogan]

284. I can't BELIEVE you posted this. Dee-CRAP is more like it

House music for Kollidge Kidz, which ain't saying a whole lot, especially since house music sounds like R2D2 getting raped with a cricket bat by Giorgio Moroder. Here's my impression of them:

Cue "sampled" (i.e., ripped off, because we're too lame to actually LEARN HOW TO PLAY AN INSTRUMENT) tired-ass drum-n-bass riff

Blip-blop, blip-bloop, stolen Disco sample, "groovey groovey farts, ahha ahahahhh"
Lameass pennywhistle won at county fair ring toss game

:puke:

I also hold these poseurs ultimately responsible for the sick 70s fashion revival that started in the early 90s and continued unabated today. Why the hell do teenagers think it's cool to dress like pimps and/or whores from old Starsky & Hutch episodes?

[datsafact]

285. favorite

Sir Douglas Quintet

[no name no slogan]

316. I have not heard them actually

but I'll say they suck anyway, just to be safe. :silly:

[malachibk]

287. Placebo & The Smashig Pumpkins (tie)

n/t

[no name no slogan]

290. Are you sure you want me to go thru with this?

Smashing Pumpkins are the REO Speedwagon of the 1990s. I always wished Chris Cornell would have kicked Billy Corgan's weenie ass when he had the chance-- at least that would have given that upper-middle-class writing school dropout a reason to be such a whiny little bitch. "Dangerous" music for those whose idea of "daring" is to go slumming at downtown rock clubs.

Placebo: damn, this is getting too easy. Let's just say that David Bowie (king of the pop sychophantic ass-kissers and rip-off artiste extraordinaire) invited them to play at his 50th birthday party. Does the music world really need a cross-dressing Nirvana? All signs point to HELL NO.

[malachibk]

295. You undermine your whole argument by dissing Bowie (though I'm sure

you'd disagree). I never though SP were particularly "dangerous" and, as much as I love Nirvana, see no connection at all between them and Placebo.

But I did ask for it.

[no name no slogan]

298. Bowie also sucks-- tremendously

Everybody knows if it weren't for Mick Ronson (RIP), Bowie would be doing his Anthony Newley impressions for the Sunday Matinee dinner theater crowd. Thank Allah for navel-gazing baby boomers, who keep him on the payroll.

Bowie is the biggest dilletante/rip-off artist in the world. First he's Lou Reed, then he's Iggy Pop, then he's Ethel Merman. He should have quit while he was ahead (i.e., 1973, after Alladin Sane).

[AccessGranted]

292. Nickelback

???

[no name no slogan]

313. Talentless, post-Nirvana drop-D-tuning loozers

that fact that you can crank your Marshall stack up to 11 does not make up for the fact that you are a talentless hack who is making money by slowly fucking the rotting corpse of Pearl Jam (what, PJ's not dead? Couldda fooled me!). These guys are so shitty, they make me long for the glory days of master wannabees Stone Pimple Toilets-- er, I mean Stone Temple Pilots.

[Burma Jones]

293. Camper van Beethoven

[no name no slogan]

312. A smarmier, even less talented Grateful Dead

Crappy lame-oid hippy-ass alterna-rock for people who think Kollidge Radio is the greatest invention since the portable four-track tape recorder. "Take the Skinheads Bowling"? Yeah, and then the Skinheads'll kick your longhaired punkass back to the freshman dorm, you Milwaukee's Best-swilling psych-major daddy's-BMW-driving weenie.

[Initech]

294. Queens Of The Stone Age

[no name no slogan]

315. Make Lemmy Kilminster look like Justin Timberlake

I haven't heard them, but I've seen the pictures. If Dubya was looking for weapons of mass destruction, he should have invaded them and confiscated their photos. They didn't git hit with the ugly stick, they got run over by the ugly steamroller.

[Common Sense Party]

300. Jayhawks. Old 97s.

Thought I'd throw you some softballs.

[no name no slogan]

301. Jayhawks? Oh Jesus, Gary Louris used to be my neighbor

Seriously. He lived two blocks away, and I'd he him and his little son at the neighborhood coffee shop all the time. He's a very nice guy IRL and a doting father, too.

But then I sold my house and moved, because he drove my freaking property values right into the sewer. I'm lucky I got out with a little bit of my ass remaining.

They Jayhawks are like Uncle Tupelo, but even worse, because they come from Minneapolis and really should know better. Second-rate Kuntry-Rawk for those who were too young to see Poco on the first go-round, but who are "too cool" to go see the Eagles reunion shows.

I'd rather sit through a month of Creedence Clearwater Revisited shows than one minute of a Jayhawks gig.

[Common Sense Party]

302. So the real question is: are there ANY good bands?

Who do you approve of?

I mean, besides the Wiggles.

[no name no slogan]

304. No, absolutely none. They all suckity-suck-suck

Even my own-- waitaminute, ESPECIALLY my own. Lamest bunch o' poseurs ever. They make me long for Kajagoogoo. :P

[Common Sense Party]

306. Or the Wiggles.

[Common Sense Party]

303. Cheap Trick.

[no name no slogan]

309. "Yr mamma's alright, yr daddy's alright, but we really suck the big one"

Uninspired midwestern power-pop. The only thing remotely interesting about CT is Rick Nielsen's ugly sweaters and even uglier guitars. These guys sound like every crappy bar band you can hear opening up for The Guess Who or BTO at every two-bit county fair and/or pole shed across the country. Somebody should call the Dream Police and have these idiots arrested.

[Tom Kitten]

305. The Fall

I have 45 cds by them...at the moment!

[no name no slogan]

310. More proof that the cream rises to the top

and the Fall slides to the bottom with the rest of the dreck. Pretentious, mumbly Manco-Punk that is not nearly as clever or tunefull as the Buzzcocks-- unless, of course, you're a second-year namedropping philosophy student at the local university.

[Maddy McCall]

307. Old 97s.

Nothing sucks about them. :D

[no name no slogan]

314. Haven't heard them, so they probably don't suck

but they blow dead goats :D

[leftist_rebel1569]

308. The Dismemberment Plan, Bright Eyes, Slowdive

I'm expecting something good.

[no name no slogan]

311. Don't know the Dismemberment Plan, but the name sucks already

Bright Eyes: Lame-ass Emo wankery done in a crybaby Paul Westerbergish voice. At least Westerberg knew it was a joke, and let everybody else in on it. The sad part about Bright Eyes is that I think this stupid fuck is "serious". Strictly for shut-ins, friendless geeks or people who don't like leaving mom's basement.

Slowdive: "Hey look, we're lame-ass rich kids from the suburbs, have delay pedals! And we can turn them up to infinity! Whee! Now lets make some songs about getting high and floating through space! Yaaaaay! Nobody's ever thought of that!" Slowdive is the epitome of why shoegaze sucked so much-- strictly music for stoned college kids who find The Cocteau Twins "challenging". About as entertaining as a weasel getting neutered without anesthesia, but not nearly as melodic.

(ps check the link for a bunch of their MP3s including the vaunted "Live In Oslo" disk they only sold on their last US tour!)

[last_texas_dem]

317. Alright

Here's one of my favorites that hasn't been mentioned:

Soul Asylum

(Don't be too rough... :-))

[no name no slogan]

322. SoldOut Asylum

As a native Minneapolitan, I can safely say these guys were THE ABSOLUTE WORST band in town in the 1980s. The big joke was that, if you were bored on a Sunday night, you could always go catch SoldOut Asylum at the 7th Street Entry-- because they always played there on Sundays, and it was almost always EMPTY, too.

They started out playing hackneyed 2nd class hardcore and (when they figured out they couldn't make any $$ doing that) moved on to making Second-rate Arena Rock.

Like one Foreigner wasn't enough, these guys upped the ante and embarrassed the living hell out of my once-proud hometown, to boot. At least the Replacements and Husker Du had the decency to break up before they got totally unlistenable.

[last_texas_dem]

325. Well, I did say not to be *too* rough...

LOL

[LaCrosseDem]

328. goddamned fine band

Replacements fan too?

[last_texas_dem]

331. Oh yeah

They're another great band. I actually decided to check out the Replacements because I had become such a big Soul Asylum fan and often heard them compared. I just wish I could have gotten into both of them earlier; I wasn't born early enough to have been musically aware when they were putting out so many of those great albums!

[no name no slogan]

332. The 'Mats, at their peak, were amazing

if they could keep sober long enough to play a good show. When they were good, they were awesome, but when they were bad, they were terrible.

I actually saw the Minneapolis "farewell" show on their last tour (by then, only Tommy and Paul were left of the original members; Chris Mars having checked out a while before), and they still weren't too bad. Not nearly as good as they were "back in the day" but still fairly decent.

[Arugula Latte]

318. The BeeGees -- They were my favorite band when I was 12 ...

Ooooh, that Barry Gibb with his open shirt, hairy chest, gold medallion and chiclet teeth -- surely you can't think of anything negative to say about the Brothers Gibb? :evilgrin:

[no name no slogan]

323. HA!!! I saw the 1979 World Tour when I was a wee lad of 10

Yeah, the one where they wore those hideous disco jumpsuits and toted around the 30-piece orchestra with them. Talk about Schlock-N-Roll! These guys made Emerson, Lake & Palmer look like the freaking CLASH!

Over-produced coke-snortin good time music for yuppies who had nothing better to do but wank away an entire decade. How could it be possible that the same group that produced musical masterpieces like "Odessa" and "Trafalgar" got such a vapid case of happy feet? DAMN, guys, I know it's hard to pay the bills ripping off the Kingston Trio, but ripping off Giorgio Freaking MORODER instead? Yeeech!

[Arugula Latte]

326. I saw them that tour ...

Oakland Coliseum. Remember me, Barry? I was the girl with brown feathery hair up in those high seats stage right screaming at every falsetto note you hit? :rofl:

[Throd]

320. Primus

[no name no slogan]

324. Make me long for Emerson Lake and Palmer (or complete deafness)

Why don't they just get it over with and rename the band "Les Claypool's Wang"? That guy's a bigger showoff than Yngwie Fecking Malmsteen, except not nearly as entertaining. Primus is what passes for clever music to college kids who weren't around when ELP was cranking out such festering turds as "Brain Salad Surgery". The only people impressed by such wankitude are first-year bass students.

[Initech]

321. The White Stripes

:popcorn:

[no name no slogan]

335. The Brown Skidmarks

I think I liked them better the first time around when they were called PUSSY GALORE (or even HOUSE OF FREAKS). Shreiking, annoying fake-blooze made by an inbred/incestuous ex-husband-sister/brother-ex-wife who-the-fuck-cares duo who should have stuck to pissing off the neighbors each weekend in their garage instead of inflicting themselves on a gullable music-buying public. What suburban yuppies think "hep" music sounds like. Eric Clapton for 30-somethings.

[LaCrosseDem]

327. Three: Niel Young& Crazy Horse, Son Volt, The Gomers

[pointblank]

333. Audioslave

better yet...Soundgarden.

Don't even try it.

[grimble_grumble]

334. The Jam, The Small Faces...

...Ocean Colour Scene and Paul Weller's solo stuff.