Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:12 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:13 AM
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:15 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:16 AM
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:17 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:18 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:20 AM
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:24 AM
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11. Get away before I call the fucking cops!! |
SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:27 AM
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:29 AM
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XemaSab
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:14 AM
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Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."
"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.
Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"
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Heidi
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:15 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:19 AM
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Heidi
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:20 AM
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9. Well, _that_ wasn't very friendly. |
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Whatsamatter? Ya don't like that joke? :evilgrin:
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:37 AM
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I just sprayed beer all over my keyboard. :spray:
:sarcasm: :evilgrin:
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Heidi
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:39 AM
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21. Consider this sub-thread |
SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:51 AM
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25. What about the penguins? |
Heidi
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:56 AM
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All your penguin are belong to us. Tasty!
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kittykatkoffeekup
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:24 AM
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after a long evening of drinking, Jim was thrown out of the bar as usual. On his way home he spotted a nun walking down the road.
After looking at her twice he ran over and tackled her, then proceeded to beat the living sh*t out of her.
Some people passing by spotted this and called the police.
As the police were pulling him away in handcuffs he looked back and said, "I thought you'd be tougher than that, Batman."
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:25 AM
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FuzzySlippers
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:24 AM
Response to Original message |
13. An oldie but a goodie. |
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King Arthur was in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt, except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place. "This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed, "Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?"
"Ah, sire, just observe," said Merlin. He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.
"Merlin, you are a genius!" said the grateful monarch. "Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected." After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then setout upon his Quest. Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled all of his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection. Sure enough, each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them, except Sir Galahad.
"Sir Galahad," exclaimed King Arthur. "My one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!"
But, alas, Sir Galahad was speechless---
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:26 AM
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SofaKingLiberal
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:29 AM
Response to Original message |
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Edited on Sun Feb-12-06 02:29 AM by SofaKingLiberal
a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving under the influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.
The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the Designated Decoy."
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kittykatkoffeekup
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:38 AM
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20. Answer on a blonds geometry test |
leeroysphitz
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:44 AM
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22. Three guys walk into a bar, the fourth one finally ducks... n/t |
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Edited on Sun Feb-12-06 02:51 AM by leeroysphits
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Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:45 AM
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leeroysphitz
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:50 AM
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24. Wait for it... wait for it... it'll come to you n/t |
Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:51 AM
Response to Reply #24 |
Crazy Guggenheim
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Sun Feb-12-06 02:52 AM
Response to Reply #22 |
27. Now it makes more sense. |
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Edited on Sun Feb-12-06 02:53 AM by Crazy Guggenheim
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renter
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Sun Feb-12-06 06:50 AM
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29. What does Billy Graham and the Indianapolis Colts... |
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have in common? They both can make an entire stadium full of people leap to thier feet and shout "JE-SUUUUS, CHR-IIIIST.
What is the difference between the Indianapolis Colts and a dollar bill? You still get four quarters from a dollar
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DU
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Thu Apr 25th 2024, 08:25 AM
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