(on a serious note) I am worried about our little girl

[underpants]

She is 6 months old and she is trying to speak. She will be speaking probably within the next 6 months and well is what I am concerned about.

What if it isn't English? What if she doesn't speak English?

What will we do? Have to learn a whole language on the spot like that? How will we do THAT????

I had a year of Spanish in jr.high and a year of French in high school and 6 credits of German...wow I am damned near a linguist huh? Anyway I have forgotten all that.

What if she speaks freakin' Mandarin? I know it is all the rage to have Mandarin tutors for your kids now (it really is) but hell without the letters and numbers I can hardly order the damned food let alone enjoy a Jerry Bruckheimer film.

So then there is that to worry about. Which only piles on top of my concerns that this whole "Baby hat" thing is really a conspiracy by SOME to introduce yarmulkes into their lives at an early age and basically provide them with ones to grow into. But then that is just what that flier on our screendoor said.

So then there is THAT too.

[KitchenWitch]

1. OMG you had me going there...

Fear not!

[LynneSin]

2. You haven't killed the child yet - you'll be fine

Just waits till she decides she doesn't need either of you anymore and decides to go potty on her own. Then what are you going to do with your life?

[LisaL]

3. I hate when that happens.

[matcom]

4. she might just bark like a dog

:D

[LisaL]

6. Oh meow like a cat. That's even worse then when they speak

chinese.

[AirmensMom]

5. You can't understand anything they say for a few years,

no matter what language they speak. Our grandson pronounces "truck" with an F instead of TR. And he says he wants one. :rofl:

Oh, and once they hit middle school, they speak some other language. So, really, you won't notice until she's about 25.

[sbj405]

7. I still remember my little neighbor saying

"Put all the frucks on the frass, we're cleaning out the farage."

lol

[AirmensMom]

8. Yep, somethin' like that ...

only with ours, it was, "I saw a fuck today ... I wanna fuck!" Then he fell in love with his grandpa's motorcycle and wanted a "harley dayyson". Gotta love 'em.

:loveya:

[BikeWriter]

20. When we were small we made the neighbor kid say truck...

hundreds of times a day! We were easily amused.

[zanne]

18. Walking down the street with my little nephew...

Suddenly he pointed and yelled "Big fuck! big fuck!".

[AirmensMom]

21. HAHAHA!

:rofl: Sounds like my grandson. :loveya:

[rbnyc]

9. LOL. It won't be English, it will be Baby!

You'll have to learn which Ba is for bottle and which is for bath, and which is for ball...very subtle distinctions.

You nut!

[underpants]

10. She was telling her pacifier just yesterday

Grr rrbbllll gggrrrr aaahhh

[Rosie1223]

11. Just wait til she's a teenager

All you'll hear is, "you're the worst dad in the world!! I hate you!!" followed by a resounding door slam.

--Rosie (mom to 3 teen daughters)

[Burma Jones]

12. You mean you're actually listening?????

Jeez, what kind of man are you?

[matcom]

14. he is new at this thing

give it 6 months. he will come 'round

[underpants]

15. We are inseperable

When I walk in the room she swings around no matter who is holding her (Mom, grandmas, daycare) and smiles at me. When she acts up (very rare) I take her and she sits in my lap and quiets down (I had to do something since I don't have THE BOOBIES!!)

She LOVES Pappa. You should see her and the girl cat trying to get time with me.

[Burma Jones]

16. Nevertheless

I will have to report you to the Tough American Dad police.....

[swimboy]

13. If it is Welsh or Croatian we will send vowels!

We are here to help you.

[miss_american_pie]

17. You don't want her to speak English

Trust me. It's better if you can't understand them when they start sassing you. ;)

[underpants]

19. "The sooner they talk

the sooner they talk back"

-Homer J Simpson

[AirmensMom]

22. When our daughter was three, she wanted a haggigle.

:wtf: Took us about 4 months to figure that one out. Then one day, someone rode by on a bicycle and she started yelling, "A haggigle, a haggigle!" She wanted a futnutnut, too. Can't even remember what that was.

[LaraMN]

23. I believe my son was speaking Japanese for awhile, as a toddler.

He eventually made the switch. No worries.

[StaggerLee]

24. bwahahahahha

I forwarded this to a co-worker. Her daughter's about the same age.

:thumbsup:

[Left Is Write]

25. It's even worse than that....

She will be speaking "toddler." It would be best if you studied up on that NOW so you'll be prepared later; however, there is no standard for "toddler" and you'll be re-writing the dictionary as you go along. One word you will be certain to recognize no matter the language: "No!" This will be said loudly, firmly, and often. Sometimes you will say it. Sometimes she will say it. If she says it, expect it to be accompanied by foot stamping, screaming, tears, folded arms, scowls, or complete body rigidity (this last when you are attempting to put on her any article of clothing she has suddenly and arbitrarily deemed unsuitable).

Good luck.

[underpants]

27. Thanks

Well she has started teething. Two teeth are already through the bottom, not one lost night of sleep over it. Nothing.

She had the RSV over the last week....no problem at all with the nebulizer in fact she holds it in place and breathes it by herself.

We are very lucky.KNOCKS ON WOOD

[Hugin]

26. It could be... *shudder* Valleyspeak!

Goodness!

[CatWoman]

28. you're so fucking crazy

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[underpants]

31. I'm on it

usted es tan jodiendo loco

vous êtes si baisant fou

Sie ficken so verrückt

你是这样见鬼疯狂的

[Ron Mexico]

38. Babelfish?

I don't know about the other languages at all, but the German didn't come through so well. :scared:

[kick-ass-bob]

29. I am worried about her, too.

But for very different reasons....

:yoiks:

At least your wife is (probably) sane.

:D

[underpants]

30. It was the Bruckheimer thing wasn't it?

Look we watch other movies too...like uh..... the one where God is Morgan Freeman and he explains the penguin thing...there was that one ....

[CatWoman]

32. ROFL!!!!!

UP is saner than most of us :D

[kick-ass-bob]

33. Well, that just worries me even more.

:hide:

[JVS]

34. I hope your child speaks Manx. The last native speaker died 12/27/1974

A new native speaker of Manx would be a boon to linguists

[Whoa_Nelly]

35. You may be interested in this DVD re: sign language with your baby

http://www.mybabycantalk.com/

Info:

My Baby Can TalkTM Products
My Baby Can TalkTM is a series of products developed to teach babies to talk with their hands before they can speak. Included in this series of products are DVDs and board books. The first two DVDs released by Baby Hands Productions are My Baby Can TalkTM - First Signs and Sharing Signs. We plan to produce at least three more videos with each video teaching twenty words that are most relevant for and most loved by young babies. Each video will have a corresponding board book and set of flashcards that represent the same words taught in the video. Board books and flashcards are resources that can be purchased separately and used to reinforce the signs taught in each video.

on edit:

And here's a link to many info DVDs

http://www.just-for-kids.com/BABYSIGN.HTM

[underpants]

37. Heard about that

a friend of a friend's kid went to a daycare where they teach the kids sign language. We have tried teaching her HUNGRY but basically at this point we know and the kid is either hungry, wet, or not crying.....great baby.

[jus_the_facts]

36. Oooo you had me freakin' out for a sec. sigh....adapt....overcome....

....jeeeze. :D :hug: :loveya:

[WeRQ4U]

39. What language is it where "dada" is universal for everything?

'Cause that's what my son speaks right now. I thought it was cool when he said "dada", after all, that's me. However, I soon realized that he also referred to the dogs, graham crackers, baby food, fish, the remote control, his crib, his shoes, dirty diapers, clean diapers, his teddy bear, his favorite book, utensiles, other humans etc. as "dada" as well.

[xchrom]

40. may i suggest rosseta stone dvds?