Olympic Short Program Commentating Competition

[mohinoaklawnillinois]

For all the DU'ers that give a fig about the outcome of the figure skating competitions in Torino, I found this hilarious commentary earlier today on the net. It wasn't posted in a newspaper, but on another discussion board I frequent. I did contact the original author and he gave me permission to "pass it on". I hope you enjoy, I did..

"Well, the Olympic Short Program Commentating Competition was just brutal.

Scott Hamilton was the first to talk, but the Morozov inspired commentating was overly simplistic and repetitive. He attempted to cram his talking with as many adjectives as possible in an effort to boost his component remarks, but they were of juvenile difficulty and rushed in execution. While not disastrous, they do Hamilton no favors as he has the worst basic talking skills in the group. Scott is currently in second place with a score of 25 points.

Sandra Beizic came into the event verbally outfitted in a Moskvina program. She attempted to go lip-to-lip with the veteran, Dick Button, but her elements were under-thought and downgraded to a level one, with a negative GOE. No doubt she had a packed program planned, but Dick Button's verbal games made her lose concentration, and reduced her to a blabber. This was disastrous as her interpretation was already out of sync with the program and caused her to falter through the final straight-line talkwork sequence; perhaps she was too over-ambitious. Sandra is currently in last place with a score of -39.

Dick Button, gold medalist at the 1988 Olympic Commentating Competition, made a surprise comeback for these games. However at the advanced age of 76, many questioned whether he would be in fighting form to win back the title from the scandalous co-gold medalist losers of 2002. Dick's comments were devoid of the flailing verbs of Scott Hamilton, and the elements were perfectly timed with the programs. He incorporated a variety of difficult analogies and smooth transitions, giving him a significant boost in the program component remarks. Most notable was his wit, which had a deep outside edge; Sandra's flutz and Scott's flat paled in comparison. Dick is currently in first place with a score of 47."

:rofl: :rofl: