My apologies Mods. after this I promise to behave.

[madokie]

Subject: No since of humor

My wife left me...

I don't understand.
She told me we had to cut back on expenses - I had to give up drinking beer. I was not a big drinker, maybe a 12-pack on weekends.

Anyway, I gave it up but I noticed the other day when she came home from grocery shopping the receipt included $45 in makeup.

I said, "Wait a minute I've given up beer and you haven't given up anything!"

She said, "I buy that makeup for you, so I can look pretty for you."

I told her, "Hell, that's what the beer was for!"

I don't think she'll be back

[in_cog_ni_to]

1. LOL!

:rofl: funny!

[Skidmore]

Haaaaaaaaaaaa! madokie, you sure know how to make

a girl feel appreshiated.

[madokie]

5. please forgive me. I promise to straighten up and fly right

[SammyWinstonJack]

2. !

:yoiks:

[Inland]

3. "Honey, the beer comes in a paper bag!" nt

[Lasher]

4. Da bump!

:rofl:

[JNelson6563]

6. I don't understand

are you asking permission from the mods to let you post lounge fodder in GD?

Anyone else curious about when the GD will split? :shrug:

[ripple]

7. what split?

Lounge "fodder" or not, it's still a funny joke!


:P

[madokie]

8. Hey I don't go to the lounge and I suspect several here don't either

I wanted and did share a funny joke, everyone needs a good laugh once in a while. sheeze:shrug::hi:

[Hubert Flottz]

9. You jus need to let 'em know you kere sometime...

Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.

On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack
my life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together
like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger.
"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds.
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

[madokie]

10. Thats a good'en, I think maybe a keeper