I married a passive-aggressive @#$#

[Ellen Forradalom]

"What's the problem?"
"Oh....." (moping) "...there's never a problem."
"WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?"
"There's no problem. I don't have a problem. Do you have a problem?" he asks our son.

"Don't mind me, I'll put all the dishes away. Don't mind me, I'll throw the garbage out."

I told I could not get to CA fast enough because he is a passive-aggressive %#$%.

[hobo_baggins]

1. thats not good...dump his ass

[Divameow77]

2. I feel your pain

[ScreamingMeemie]

3. Are you leaving him behind?

I'm so sorry you are suffering. MrG and I go through spells like that, but we always manage to work them out. But my ex was another story. :hug:

[Ellen Forradalom]

5. It's tough, isn't it?

He's a decent human being, a peach of a guy, responsible, all that stuff, but a MASTER of passive aggression. He turned into a complete "Oh, nothing's the matter" mope from the day before I left to interview in California. It took him nearly a week for him to tell me he was proud of me for going and getting the job--that after a week of hassling me.

GAWD DAMN!

:rant:

[Karenina]

8. Be Aware Ellen

I was married to a passive-aggressive Minnesotan. (They got a LOCK on finnessing that shit). The SABOTAGE became unbearable. "Oh yeah, you had a gig. I just FORGOT!"

[ScreamingMeemie]

9. Yes it is. They can be mega game players...and somehow always

manage to turn us into "the bad guy". :hug:

My heart goes out to you.

On the plus side, if you are moving to So Cal, my brothers live out there and maybe we can meet someday! :)

[LeftyMom]

4. OMG, does LeftyKid's Dad have a twin?

I'm sorry. Putting up with that kind of self-pitying shit was absolutely maddening and I woudn't wish it on anybody.

Best of luck with your move. :)

[mopinko]

6. from my experience,

what may be happening is the war between love and fear. when my dh and i finally found the trust, the love just bubbled up. it was always there, it was just tangled up in fear. and especially when things get bad, the fear of abandonment that we all have, (some more than others) can really take over, and make things impossible.
good luck, ellen. for your little one's sake, i hope that you can at least find a way to be decent to each other. unfortunately, when you have a kid, divorce can be only the beginning of the REAL rotten times. it sucks that he tries to pull the kid in. a real sign of desperation, imho.

[henslee]

7. Are you my sister, Jenna? I swear I had the convesaton with her

about her boyfriend.

[Nikia]

10. My husband's passive agressive too

Which is hard for me to deal with because no one in my family was passive aggressive. The few friends who I had that were passive aggressive usually involved periods of time when I ignored them while they exhibited what was puzzling behavior to me.
My husband learned passive aggressive behavior from his mother who I have managed to accidently anger because I wasn't playing her game.

[Ellen Forradalom]

11. Exactly the same here

You can get onto my MIL's shitlist in a heartbeat and over nothing. Even my sister-in-law, who is damned near perfect, finds herself on it. I basically like my MIL but she's a real Heather, most unattractive in a woman her age.